In the modern world of dating, women are rediscovering the allure of old-school romance amidst the hustle and bustle of our fast-paced lives. Whether you take on the roles of a single parent, business owner, or high-level manager, the call to return to simpler times resonates louder than ever.
For those women dipping their toes back into the dating pool after a hiatus, the longing for a partner with timeless values that allows them to enjoy their femininity at home is palpable. But here’s a word of warning: While navigating the dating scene, it’s all too easy to confuse real, old-fashioned charm with the sinister undertones of misogyny. So, how do you know if someone is old-fashioned or misogynistic?
In this deep dive, we reveal the complex dance between traditional values and disturbing bias against women, known as misogyny. It is a journey through the vagaries and expectations of society, where perceptions of old-school romanticism intersect with the shadows of harmful beliefs.
1 – Objectification of women
One glaring manifestation of misogyny is the objectification of women. This insidious behavior reduces women to mere objects whose primary purpose, according to those who espouse misogynistic beliefs, is to aesthetically please men (or women, depending on sexual orientation). This reductionist perspective is based on the idea that a woman’s value is intrinsically linked to her physical appearance.
One often overlooked sign that someone is objectifying women can be seen frequently on dating apps. Imagine you’re chatting with someone and things seem to be going well when the other person asks you to send them more photos (please don’t do that).
A good response in this case is to simply end the dialogue at that point. If they spend time chatting with you, they can easily invite you out for coffee at the very least. Anything else is a red flag that they objectify women.
Classification of women broadly
Misogynistic individuals often indulge in the degrading practice of rating women on a numerical scale, a crude attempt to determine their worth and rank them based on perceived attractiveness. Not only does this objectify women, but it also perpetuates harmful beauty standards, fostering an environment where self-worth hinges on meeting these arbitrary standards.
Sadly, this has become a trend on social media, with the quip, “She’s 10, but [insert random trait, personality type, or behavior].
This may be a common practice in high school, but should never be accepted in dating or real-life relationship situations as adults. This is a blatant sign not only of misogyny but also of a severe lack of emotional maturity.
Insulting language
In addition to numerical labels, misogynists use derogatory language to describe women who do not meet their standards of beauty. The use of derogatory terms to describe “unattractive” women perpetuates a toxic culture that devalues individuals based on their appearance, fostering an environment in which self-esteem is closely tied to societal standards of beauty.
Another way misogynists use derogatory language against women is by calling women whores and sluts when they are trying to instill fear, trying to put a woman back “in her place,” or trying to remind her of who she is. It boils down to her private parts.
Furthermore, her female organs are all she is allowed to use, not her mind, heart, voice, or passion. So, when a misogynist calls a woman a “c**”, they’re saying: Know your worth – you’re here for no other reason than to be used by me.
Criticism of little girls
Worryingly, misogynistic attitudes extend beyond adult women to include young girls. The tendency to criticize underage girls’ appearance and bodies highlights the pervasive nature of these harmful beliefs, which affect individuals at various stages of life. This aspect of misogyny raises concerns about the wider effects on the self-esteem and mental health of young girls.
This is completely inappropriate. There’s a reason why social media has gotten a bad reputation for damaging the mental health of young girls and teens. If your partner or someone you’re dating engages in this behavior, it’s time to find an escape.
Control behaviors
Misogynists often use controlling behaviour, dictating your clothing choices, as well as how you style your hair and makeup. This goes beyond simply expressing preferences, which is a normal aspect of healthy relationships. This person may insist that you change your clothes if they do not match his desires. Their influence permeates various aspects of a relationship, including, but not limited to, your job, eating habits, clothing, hobbies, friends, and connections with family. Increased isolation often amplifies their control.
