Narcissistic abuse is one of the worst types of psychological abuse a person can do to another person, but unfortunately, many people are stuck in this type of relationship.
Whether it’s an emotionally abusive child and parent, or an adult with a narcissistic partner, the effect is the same – narcissistic abuse can leave more than just emotional damage.
Because according to recent studies, neuroscientists have discovered that long-term narcissistic abuse can lead to actual physical brain damage.
(We also talk about 7 ways to deal with narcissistic abuse below.)
Long-term narcissistic abuse: effects on the brain
It is known these days that sustained emotional trauma over a long period of time can cause victims to develop PTSD and PTSD.
Because of this, anyone in a destructive relationship with a partner who cares little about the emotional safety of their family should leave immediately, especially when children are involved.
However, some people do not take this warning seriously, due to its emotional basis. What many fail to realize is that emotional and psychological distress is only one side of the coin experienced by victims of long-term narcissistic abuse.
There is also a physical aspect to brain damage, when victims of sustained emotional abuse experience shrinking of the hippocampus and swelling of the amygdala. Both of these conditions lead to devastating effects.
The hippocampus is critical to learning and developing memories, while the amygdala is where negative emotions such as shame, guilt, fear, and envy pulse.
Understanding the hippocampus
The hippocampus is the Greek word for “seahorse,” and it’s the part of the brain hidden inside each temporal lobe, visibly shaped like two seahorses.
One of the most important functions of the hippocampus is short-term memory, which is the first step towards learning. Information is first stored in short-term memory before it is converted into permanent memory.
Without short-term memory, there can be no learning.
And the damage to the hippocampus is more worrisome than scientists first thought. And in a study from Stanford University and the University of New Orleans, they found that there was a close relationship between high levels of cortisol (the stress-induced hormone) and decreased volume of the hippocampus.
The more stressed people are, the smaller their hippocampus becomes.
Understanding the amygdala
The amygdala is known as the reptilian brain, because it controls our emotions and our elementary functions, including lust, fear and hate, as well as our heart rate and breathing.
When stimulated, the amygdala is where the fight-or-flight response takes place. Narcissists keep their victims in a state where their amygdala is constantly on alert.
Eventually, these victims fall into a constant state of anxiety or fear, as the amygdala reacts to the slightest signs of abuse.
Long after the victim escapes from the destructive relationship, he or she will continue to live with symptoms of PTSD, increased phobias, and panic attacks, due to an enlarged amygdala that has become accustomed to living in a state of fear. To protect themselves from their reality, these victims often use defense mechanisms that distort reality and make it easier to deal with, such as:
Projection: Victims convince themselves that the narcissistic abuser has positive traits and intentions such as compassion and understanding, when in reality this may not be the case.
Partition: Victims focus on the positive parts of the relationship, separating them from the abusive parts and thus ignoring them.
Denial: Victims end up believing that their situation is not as bad as they feel, that it is easier to live with it than to face it.
The damaged hippocampus: paralyzing all we know
The hippocampus is perhaps the most important part of the brain when it comes to cognition and function. Everything we do, understand, read, and learn depends solely on the hippocampus functioning properly.
This is because the hippocampus is involved in the formation of new memories and is also linked to learning and emotions
But the hippocampus is damaged when the body releases cortisol, a hormone released during times of stress. Cortisol actively attacks neurons in the hippocampus, causing them to shrink.
The amygdala is then stimulated by cortisol, which shifts our thoughts and neural activity from heightened mental acuity to anxiety and stress.
When these painful feelings are pushed to the limits, our brain activity is pushed “beyond its zones of efficacy.”
But remember: prolonged periods of moderate stress can be just as harmful, if not worse, than short-term severe stress. Even if the narcissistic abuser doesn’t take it “too far”, it can still wreak havoc on the victim’s brain.
[Buddhism not only provides a spiritual outlet for many people, but it can also improve the quality of our personal relationships. Check out my new no-nonsense guide to using Buddhism for a better life here].
Rebuild your hippocampus and calm your amygdala
But there is always a way back to a normally functioning brain. Through methods such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy, or EMDR, victims who show signs of PTSD can regrow 6% of their hippocampus in just a few sessions.
EMDR can also calm the amygdala at the same time, allowing your brain to react more rationally to situations.
Some other proven methods include aromatherapy and essential oils, guided meditation, altruistic acts, and the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), which is useful for normalizing biochemical short-circuiting, which is commonly observed in chronic anxiety.
But the first step is ultimately the most important: getting out of the destructive and abusive relationship. Before any progress can be made toward recovery, the victim must acknowledge the situation and accept its reality.
So, if you are looking for ways to deal with narcissistic abuse, check out the seven tips below:
[Buddhism not only provides a spiritual outlet for many people, but it can also improve the quality of our personal relationships. Check out my new no-nonsense guide to using Buddhism for a better life here].
