It’s very easy to figure out exactly who a narcissist is and why they’re so intent on ruining your life.
I agree, it’s hard to spot the red flags until you see one. Then, you know what?
You start seeing them everywhere.
When you begin to understand and delve deeper into a narcissist, your life will change completely.
And guess what? It’s much easier than you think!
Wait Till You Get The Hate Out…
It’s been a long time coming, isn’t it?
For a while, you’ve suspected that the person you care deeply about is a narcissist.
You can see them flinch from time to time if things aren’t going their way, or if they feel threatened or jealous in a moment.
Related : Say This ONE Line To Instantly Shut Down Narcissist Manipulation
It all boils down to one detail that’s more important than you realize:
They’re not as powerful as they pretend to be.
Everything they do, from manipulating you to manipulating you and controlling every aspect of your life, is designed to make you believe they’re smarter, stronger, and more important than they actually are.
This, in turn, makes you feel weak and powerless.
But once you discover the truth, their whole game falls apart. Not just for a while, but forever.
Here’sTheProblem: Narcissists don’t want you to realize this: They need you more than you need them.
It’s a game changer, isn’t it?
The moment you realize this truth (because it is), you leave them with absolutely no power. Your mind shifts gears, and you’re faced with the harsh reality that you’ve been taken advantage of all this time.
It’s normal to feel angry. I get it. I would be too. Angry that you wasted all this time trying to win the approval and acceptance of someone who never cared about you.
Upset that you can’t get that time back, no matter how hard you try.
But the best part?
Without you, none of this would have happened.
This isn’t about blaming you. It’s not about making you feel guilty or ashamed for believing their lies.
Narcissists seek out people who are kind, compassionate, empathetic, forgiving, and like to put others before themselves.
They look for a sympathetic persona to use against them over time.
Related : 20 Things That Seriously Confuse a Narcissist
When you discover that they need you more than you need them, it will turn everything upside down.
They pretend to be in control, but without your attention, admiration, and energy, they are powerless.
Their Self Confidence Is Fake.
It’s just a show. If they could sell tickets to it, they certainly would.
Beneath any narcissist’s arrogance lies a deep-seated sense of insecurity.
They pretend they don’t need anyone, but in reality, they can’t live long without a circle of people around them for support.
They are soul thieves. They commit identity theft daily for moral reasons. And they do it in a way that makes others believe they don’t need anyone.
This is simply not true, and all this confidence you see from them is an illusion, specifically designed to make you think they are in control.
Manipulation equals fear of exposure.
That’s the crux of the matter, isn’t it? A narcissist doesn’t really care about you.
They don’t want control because they’re a good person. They don’t prove themselves and are always right because they’re kind and have your best interests at heart.
They do it because it’s the only way they can keep you under their control.
Have you ever heard a narcissist say:
Whatever happens between us stays between us.
It’s no one else’s business.
We don’t need to bother people with our problems.
Related ; 20 Things That Completely Ruins a Narcissist’s Day
I don’t want others to think there are problems between us.
I want to show that we’re strong together.
We have to work together to keep any disagreements within this house.
That’s what I thought.
Control. Manipulation. And…
Fear of exposure.
They know exactly what they’re doing, and they want to keep it under wraps to get away with it for as long as possible, but…
You don’t have to play their game.
And why should you?
This only proves that they need you more than you need them, and discovering that is the fun part.
Soon after, you’ll watch their world slowly crumble, and there’s nothing they can do to stop it.
Why The Need In The First Even?
Return to the first time you met the narcissist.
How did they treat you?
Did they nearly bring the world to a standstill to make you fall in love with them?
They certainly did. Their mission was powerful because they desperately needed someone like you.
Notice I said someone like you. It could have been anyone, as long as they possessed the same kind, compassionate, and forgiving qualities as you.
Once they had succeeded with you, they decided to break up. You were on an honest, loving journey.
You thought they might be the one. They listened to you and your problems so intently. They made promises that you truly loved.
Everything seemed to be going well.
But they needed you to feed their ego. Every time you apologized when you shouldn’t have.
Every time you asked them if they were okay because they were silently complaining at home for no reason. Every time they made you feel less valuable.
The more you give to the narcissist, the more you take from yourself.
Narcissists are incapable of giving self-love, so they steal your love.
How To Regain Control Instantly
Let’s be real here:
You have to stop justifying yourself. If that means rejection, that’s the perfect start.
Stop giving their attempts to provoke you time and choose silence instead. It’s actually their worst nightmare.
Related : Strange Things Narcissists Collect That Raise Red Flags
Start by setting firm boundaries and letting go of the guilt they impose on you.
Walk away without warning and tell them you won’t be touched anymore.
Once you realize that narcissists only have power when you give it to them, you’ll become a completely new person with new, untouchable boundaries.
This is exactly what they fear most.
