Narcissist, I Forgot To Tell You Something

I haven’t left you yet.

Don’t think it’s simply because I love you. It’s because I still think you love me too. I am hopelessly unaware that your heart does not hold mine.

That he couldn’t attach himself to me.

I don’t understand that I am something I acquired along the way.

I think I’m your girl, your love, your best friend.

I think you can’t live without me.

Because I can not live without you.

I still believe in you.

I do not yet understand that good and evil can exist in one person.

I choose to confuse evil with anger.

I believe your words.

Even if your actions contradict them.

I’m still trying to figure you out.

I see the best in you.

Even if you confuse me.

I did not recognize the fear, manipulation and control even though it lurked among us.

I’m too busy making your world go round so I can see it.

I don’t realize you lack confidence, my handsome wizard shows it.

I give selflessly and do not know selfishness.

I don’t feel your fantasy world because you play so well in reality.

I put you on a pedestal so there is no need to ask for praise.

I understand that you can get what you want but you confuse that with success.

I don’t think of the word empathy.

I don’t realize it’s missing.

I have yet to experience the intense anger of an emotionally abusive bully.

I know precisely the tears.

I’ve only met two different people staying in one place.

My friend, my love, my best friend.

And the stranger who looks like him.

Who can’t stick to me?

I see the contradiction.

I hurt, I mourn, I oscillate between love and abandonment.

And hide the bad deeds for your benefit.

I suppress my mind in exchange for your madness.

I see you but I don’t believe you.

Even though you keep showing me who you are.

i can’t live without you.

Because I still think you can’t live without me.

I am not giving you.

I have attached myself to your heart.

I will fight to not understand your ability to win.

I will foolishly ask for your attention.

I will remind you…

I am your girl, your love, your best friend.

I will root for you.

I will continue to see the best in you.

I will believe in the impossible.

I’ll sacrifice everything, and then some.

because i love you.

Until I realize that you can’t love me again.