I bet the phrase “love bombing” sounds great to you, right? Well, it is actually a tactic that narcissists use. Yikes!
When some people talk about narcissists, the last word they use is “love.” This is because when you realize you are with a narcissist, the love you thought you had is not real at all. It’s strange because in the beginning everything was a whirlwind of adventure and excitement.
And this is how it works. The narcissist survives serious love at the beginning and your breakdown near the end of the relationship. There is a name for this.
Examples of love bombing
I could talk all day about why narcissists do the things they do, or how they feel about themselves, but does that put it in perspective? Not real.
One of the best ways to understand how they act is to talk about some examples of how they raised you only to put you down. If you can see the similarities, it might save you from this love torment.
- “I love you” comes way too soon
Saying I love you is never wrong. But saying you love someone romantically is something you should think about long and hard beforehand. Narcissists are notorious for rushing into relationships with declarations of love.
And the look on their faces makes it seem like they’re completely loyal. In a way, because they are, for the moment, in love. They are in love, not you.
- Too many compliments
Here is an example of how a narcissist might drop a love bomb. Now, we love how our boyfriends or girlfriends compliment us, right? It’s nice to hear that you’re talented or beautiful, isn’t it?
The narcissist will give you so many of these compliments, and it feels like you’re living in a dream. And guess what it is. Some things a narcissist might say are, “You have the most beautiful voice I’ve ever heard” or “I don’t know how I lived without you.”
The compliments are thick and sweet, it seems we will see them for what they are, but we are hypnotized. We hear these wonderful compliments and they make us feel good about ourselves and give us an adrenaline boost like never before. Watch out for these strong compliments.
They are not what they seem.
- It’s really about them
You may get a lot of compliments, but keep an eye on them when they get a chance to pay attention. They will quickly drop you off for an extra compliment of themselves, and this is usually from someone else.
Not only will narcissists love blowing you off, but they’ll stand under a shower of love from anyone, anywhere. Remember, it doesn’t matter where it came from. It is only important that their life is always intense.
- You’re meant to be their soul mate
Narcissists, on their journey towards absolute control, will try to convince you that you two are soulmates. From the start, that rush of hormones you get during the beginning of a relationship will be called a sign that you were meant to be together forever.
This is what a narcissist will tell you. You’ll know it’s time to run away if someone says they feel like they could marry you, and you only knew them for a week or two.
- Partners in need
You will know that you are being bombarded with love when your significant other is most needy. They’ll want your constant attention, and when you’re gone, they’ll blow up your phone with texts and calls until you come back. This may sound cute, but in fact, it is a controlled maneuver that they use to further entrap you. - Those adorable gestures
Bombing love means extravagant gifts. From the very beginning, your partner will buy you lots of cute and romantic gifts, like teddy bears, flowers, or even expensive perfumes. Guys, narcissistic ladies also exist and can afford expensive watches or cologne.
These bountiful early gifts may make you feel good at first, but over time, you’ll start to feel suffocated. Their actions will stop matching their gifts, and when you get angry, they will try to make you feel guilty for “doing so much for you.” It’s a toxic game.
This kind of “love” is heartbreaking
When it comes to love bombing, a lot of people get hurt. The worst part is, they didn’t see it coming. If you are not familiar with the tactics of this type of narcissist, you will fall in love with a fictional story. It will be one of those fairy tales that will not have a happy ending. And you won’t forget it easily either.
I was there. I’ve had a love bomb thrown at me by a narcissist before and the pain was worse than being abused by someone who was an honest idiot with a chip on their shoulder. I think losing love is sometimes harder than being loved in the first place.
