It all starts like a fairy tale. You meet, you fall in love. You feel the luckiest woman in the world. It gives you all the attention you can. He covers you with gifts, takes you to dinner, offers you flowers, he is a real prince charming. Who would refuse such attentions? No one and you either.
You wanted to believe in love and it presented itself as the love you had been waiting for your whole life.
Everything happened very quickly. He wanted to take it to the next level and almost forced you to do the same. He blinded you so much with love and care that you thought “that’s it”, the perfect man. You thought you had finally found the person you were going to spend your entire life with.
You see, this is how their little game works. This is how they lure you into their trap. In fact, when you take away all the gifts and trips you’ve taken, all you’re left with is a narcissistic leech that empties you of everything.
When the first warning signs appeared, I chose to ignore them. You weren’t able to admit that you had fallen for such meaningless lies and gestures. He used everything he could to blind you.
So I trusted his stupid excuses. You chose to believe it because again it was very convincing. At the time, his apologies made a lot of sense. But everything was back as it was before. For a while, he treated you like a queen, making sure you trusted him again and that he could continue his unhealthy little game.
This can last for years, depending on your strength and determination. Depending on whether you are afraid of him or not. Depending on whether you have lost the desire to fight and your self-respect.
Living in these conditions is something no one should ever experience. Living under the yoke of a ruthless narcissist can completely consume and destroy you, but freeing yourself from it can give you a second chance to love someone else and receive the love you’ve always deserved.
If you’re thinking about going out with a narcissist, be very careful and watch for the following warning signs:
- They never apologize
They never apologize because they are sure they will never do anything wrong. They terribly lack empathy for other people’s feelings. For example, if they arrive late and let you stay without warning, they won’t apologize because they consider themselves the most important thing in the world, and if you have to wait for them, do so. It’s not their problem.
This can arise in many ways in your own relationship, from trivial things (like being late) to more serious things. So pay attention to this dangerous warning signal and react in time.
- They are obsessed with perfection
They like to reflect the world as they see it – an ideal world. Since you are involved in a relationship with them, they see you as a reflection of themselves. So do not be surprised if the narcissistic person tries to make you change in any way, for example your behavior or appearance. They will even try to control your thinking. They will try to impose their own definition of “good” visualization on you.
They will try to push you to fight for something they have imposed on you as an ideal. You will gradually lose your voice and identity. You will end up becoming what they want you to be, not what you dreamed you would become.
- They have a very attractive personality
This is how they “catch you”. It can be very magnetic. They have tremendous energy that consumes you. Their energy and enthusiasm will blind you. You end up only seeing what they want you to see. This all happens from the beginning.
What they really want is to get all the attention and be in the middle of the action, and what comes next.
- They create everything around them
No matter which direction the conversation takes, they will always find a way to steer it in a direction that works for them. They know exactly how to attract attention, and what they like most.