As we age, romance doesn’t have to fade. In fact, it can become better, richer, and more fulfilling. But sometimes, our behaviors can get in the way.
Letting go of certain habits can open up the space for love and intimacy to flourish. And trust me, it’s not about becoming someone else, it’s about letting go of the things that don’t serve us.
In this article, I’ll help you identify and remove the obstacles that may be holding back your romance.
Let’s start reigniting that spark.
1) Stop Living in the Past
As we age, it’s all too easy to get caught up in nostalgia and “what ifs.” But here’s the thing: dwelling on the past can keep us from fully enjoying the present.
Dwelling on past relationships, past mistakes, or past glories can blind us to the potential romance happening right before our eyes. It can hinder our ability to connect with our partner on a deeper level.
Romance thrives in the present moment. It’s about fully engaging with your partner, appreciating them for who they are now, not who they were or who you wish they were.
If you want more romance as you age, make a conscious effort to live in the present. It’s not about forgetting your past, but rather not letting it control your present.
It’s never too late to create new memories and experiences. And who knows, maybe the best ones are yet to come.
2) Get Rid of the “Perfect Partner” Image
We all have this image in our minds of what our ideal partner should look like. I used to have a checklist of sorts myself—everything from their appearance to their career to their hobbies.
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But over time, I’ve realized that this “perfect partner” image can get in the way of true romance.
Why? Because we’re so busy measuring our partners up against this ideal that we forget to appreciate them for who they are.
I remember one day, while my partner was making breakfast (which he does every morning), I found myself critiquing his cooking style in my head. Then it occurred to me that instead of appreciating his gesture of love, I was comparing him to my “ideal partner,” who in my mind was a great chef.
That’s when I decided to let go of that image and started appreciating my partner for his unique qualities and quirks. And you know what? Our relationship has gotten better and more romantic ever since.
3) Stop Trying to Win Every Argument
In the heat of an argument, it’s easy to get caught up in the desire to “win.” But here’s something worth considering: A study from the University of California, Berkeley, found that couples who approach conflict as collaborators rather than competitors have longer, happier relationships.
That’s not to say you should never argue. Conflict is a natural part of any relationship. What matters is how you handle it.
If your goal in every argument is to prove that you’re right and your partner is wrong, you’re not fostering an environment of love and understanding. In fact, you’re creating a battleground.
This shift can make a huge difference in the level of intimacy and romance in your relationship.
