Have you ever felt like someone is trying to manipulate you?
You’re not alone. Many of us have come across people who are experts at getting others to do what they want. What’s so exciting about them? We often don’t realize it until it’s too late.
So, how about putting on your detective hat and learning how to spot these scammers? By being aware of these signs, you can outsmart them and avoid falling into their traps.
Sit back and let’s delve into the world of these cunning behaviors.
1) They Always Play the Victim
Have you ever met someone who always seems to be the victim?
No matter the situation, they somehow end up being the one wronged. This is a classic tactic used by manipulators.
By playing the victim, they elicit your sympathy and manipulate your emotions, making it easier for them to influence your decisions and actions.
So, the next time you come across someone who seems to have an endless stream of sad stories, take a step back and think – is he really just unlucky or is he just trying to manipulate you?
2) They Know Exactly What to Say to Flatter You
Who doesn’t love compliments, right? But manipulators take this to a whole new level.
They have a knack for saying just the right thing to make you feel special. But don’t be fooled — this isn’t genuine admiration. It’s a calculated move to gain your trust and make you more open to their influence.
Be aware that someone always seems to be flirting with you. Genuine compliments are great, but constant flattery can be a sign of manipulation.
3) They Make You Feel Guilty for No Reason
Have you ever felt guilty without knowing exactly why? That happened to me once.
I had a friend who would often make me feel bad for not spending enough time with her. She would say things like, “You’re always so busy. I feel like you don’t value our friendship.” I would feel guilty and cancel plans just to hang out with her.
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This is a classic guilt trip, and it’s a common tactic used by manipulators. They make you feel guilty for things that aren’t your fault, or they twist situations to make you feel like you’re at fault. This way, they can more easily control your actions and decisions.
4) They rarely take responsibility for their actions
Have you noticed how some people never seem to do anything wrong?
They are experts at shifting blame and often find creative ways to pin their mistakes on others. This way, they manage to maintain a clean image and keep you off balance.
5) They often invalidate your feelings
Imagine this: You’re having a bad day, and you decide to open up to someone about how you’re feeling. But instead of listening and empathizing, they dismiss your feelings as trivial or exaggerated. That can be very hurtful, right?
Well, that’s something that manipulative people do a lot. They invalidate your feelings to make themselves seem superior or to gain control of the situation.
Keep in mind that your feelings are valid and do matter. So, when you notice that someone is constantly dismissing your feelings or making you feel small for expressing them, it could be a sign of manipulation.
Always surround yourself with people who respect your feelings and lift you, not those who tear you down.
6) They Use Your Insecurities Against You
Let me share a personal story with you. I used to be extremely self-conscious about my weight. I had a friend who knew about my insecurities. Instead of being supportive, he often used them against me.
Every time we disagreed about something, he would make a hurtful comment about my weight, which made me feel bad about myself.
This is a common trick in the manipulator’s playbook. They will use your insecurities against you to make you feel weak and more likely to give in to their demands.
It’s a low blow, but it’s effective. Be alert when someone is constantly using your vulnerabilities against you during arguments or disagreements. Because they may be trying to manipulate you.
7) They’re Master Manipulators
Let’s be real for a moment – manipulation is like living in a nightmare. You start to question your sanity. You feel like you’re losing your grip on reality. It’s that annoying feeling when someone tells you that what you just saw didn’t happen. Or the thing you remember vividly never happened.
And guess what? Manipulators love manipulation. It’s their secret weapon. They use it to confuse you, to make you question your memory, your perception, or your judgment. It’s a psychological manipulation technique that can be incredibly damaging.
Make sure to step back and evaluate the situation when someone in your life is constantly trying to make you doubt yourself or make you feel like you’re “crazy.”
Trust your instincts, believe in yourself, and don’t let anyone manipulate your reality.
8) They Always Want Something in Return
Did you know that according to Psychology Today, one of the main traits of manipulative people is that they often expect something in return for their help or kindness? Yes, with manipulators, nothing is given for free.
You might find it strange when someone who “helps” you always expects a favor in return. They make you feel like you owe them a favor, which creates a sense of obligation. In this way, they can control what you do and when you do it.
9) They Always Change the Subject
I had a coworker who was a master at changing the subject.
Every time I tried to discuss something important, especially if it was a problem or something he didn’t want to talk about, he would cleverly steer the conversation in a different direction. It was like trying to catch a fish with your bare hands—slippery and frustrating!
This is another tactic manipulators use to avoid accountability or uncomfortable topics. They evade difficult conversations and divert your attention to something else. In this way, they maintain control of the situation and avoid any blame or negative consequences.
When you notice someone constantly diverting the subject, especially in serious situations, it could be a sign of manipulation.
10) They Always Outsmart You
We all know that person who always has a story or experience that’s just a little bit better (or worse) than yours.
Did you get a new job? They have a better job. Are you having a tough week? Their week was a nightmare. It’s exhausting. This outsmarting you is another way manipulators maintain control.
They make you feel like your experiences, good or bad, are never enough. Don’t be fooled; your experiences and feelings are valid, no matter what anyone else says.
11) They Use the Silent Treatment as a Weapon
Have you ever been cold-shouldered by someone when you disagreed with them or didn’t do what they wanted?
That’s the silent treatment, and manipulators use it as a weapon. It’s their way of punishing you, making you feel guilty, and forcing you to give in to their demands just to end the uncomfortable silence.
12) They’re Too Charming… At First
Manipulators can be incredibly charming, but it’s a means to an end.
They use their charm to draw you in, gain your trust, and get you to let your guard down. But once they get what they want, the charm often wears off, and their true colors begin to emerge.
Be wary of people who are overly charming or who over-praise you right from the start—this could be a sign of manipulation.
Remember, recognizing these signs is the first step to protecting yourself from manipulation. Trust your instincts and don’t let anyone control or take advantage of you.
