Released in May 2018, Infidelity: Why Men and Women Cheat by Dr. Kenneth Rosenberg delves into the latest research on the reasons why some people are unfaithful to their partners.
Rosenberg highlights three determinants of cheating as well as seven common personality traits that increase a person’s likelihood of cheating on their significant other.
Related: 8 signs someone is trying a bit too hard to seem classy
According to a Daily Mail article, Rosenberg’s research points to cases of infidelity coming from all walks of life.
He’s noticed it in everyone, from millennials with looser sexual norms to older adults and even people from religious backgrounds who claim to be happy in their marriages. This makes him believe that sexual orientation, age, race, socioeconomic status, and even religious background have little impact on the likelihood of cheating.
Statistically, certain groups have slightly higher infidelity rates than others (I think we’ve all heard the statistic that men cheat more than women). However, in general, all groups cheat, and this may be because they possess the personality traits of a cheater.
Dr. Rosenberg says some factors make you (or your partner) more likely to cheat. Based on Dr. Rosenberg’s research over more than 20 years as a psychologist (with experience treating sexual problems), he has observed these factors that determine cheating behaviors.
Related: People with self-respect never tolerate these 10 behaviors from others
Here are the three factors that determine cheating behavior:
- Brain
More precisely, the way your brain works chemically. Dr. Rosenberg believes that this has an impact on an individual’s tendency toward cheating. It has been suggested that approximately 50% of what distinguishes a cheater from a non-cheater is biological differences in brain chemicals. Yes. What a withdrawal wink, wink.
- Psychology
The way you think depends on how you experience (or experience) the world and how you feel you fit into it. How has this developed the way you think about your romantic life?
Related: 7 subtle behaviors of self-centered people in relationships, according to psychology
- Culture
The way your cultural background (or environment as a whole) has shaped your beliefs about sex, love, and infidelity.
All three of these things boil down to the fact that the easier it is for you to cheat, the more likely you are to do it.
However, Dr. Rosenberg seems to believe that the biggest predictor of a person’s ability to cheat is the personality traits that make the individual feel entitled to cheat.
If he has any of these seven personality traits, he is most likely to cheat on you:
- Narcissism
This one is a little on the nose. People with narcissistic tendencies tend to feel as if their needs outweigh the needs of others. So, for the narcissist, you may not have met his need (you may not even know about it) so he feels entitled to meet that need elsewhere regardless of your need to not be cheated on.
- Lack of empathy
The tendency to not consider another’s point of view seems to be a huge personality trait that leads people to infidelity. A man who lacks empathy may not be able to think about how he would feel if the roles were reversed. If he seems to be having problems seeing your point of view, this could be a big problem – run away! (Just kind of kidding).
- Greatness
A man who thinks he’s so much better than he is (and probably thinks he’s so good that he can get away with cheating). This is usually rooted in a need to validate one’s sexual abilities (which need to be validated with more than one partner).
Related: 8 Tiny Warning Signs That Scream ‘Do Not Marry Him!’
- Impulsivity
This one is pretty obvious. Impulsiveness leads to not thinking things through. Therefore, instead of thinking about the consequences of an affair, they may spontaneously give into exciting situations.
- Thrill seeker
Let’s be real, monogamy is a lot of things (most of which are great, in my opinion), but it’s not always that exciting. So, those with a thrill-seeking personality trait are more likely to get bored and crave the excitement that cheating can bring.
- Avoidant attachment style
This is just the stereotypical fear of commitment. It’s a stereotype for a reason I think.
- Self-destruction (or masochism)
People with self-destructive tendencies not only always stick to bad habits related to their health and financial decisions, but they can also destroy their relationships with self-destructive cheating behaviors.
Related: 6 Signs You’re In Love With Someone Who Thinks They’re “Too Cool” For You