Let’s be honest: everyone lies.
So take a deep breath. If your man lies once or twice, it doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy – he’s just human.
However, no matter how small or believable the lies are, no one likes being lied to!
It’s still best to keep our relationships as honest as possible. The first step is to be aware of when someone is lying so you can confront them head-on.
Want to know when a man is lying to you?
Here are 9 phrases to watch out for.
1) “Anyway…”
He’s talking about something important, and then you notice him tense up.
His body language clearly tells him he’s lying, so you roll your eyes because you know you need to look deeper, “Um… wait a minute… something’s not right.”
But then he acts like everything is fine and says “Anyway…” hoping you’ll forget what you just noticed.
The funny thing is that he was talking about something completely random!
For example, he would say “Well, my ex was there but she didn’t see me”… and then he would say “Anyway, what did you have for lunch?” or “Anyway, let’s talk about Bali, we’ve been planning for months! Let’s do it!”
It’s weird that he had to change the subject so suddenly. He must be lying and hiding something from you.
2) “I’m not sure…”
“She took $1000 or $2000. I’m not sure…”
“She hugged me and I think she kissed me on the cheek but I was really drunk, I’m not sure…”
But the thing is, his body language shows that he is already sure. He breaks eye contact and moves.
He doesn’t want you to know that he knows what he did because he’s afraid of being judged and held accountable for his actions.
Pay attention to how many times he uses this phrase to lie to you.
Ask yourself this: is he really someone who has forgotten? If the answer is “no,” there’s a chance he’s actually lying to you when he says, “I’m not sure…”
3) “Oh… I misunderstood.”
You told him something he told you weeks ago.
Maybe he promised you he’d stop playing video games. And when you say, “Hey, you said you’d stop playing.”
He’ll say, “What? I never said that. Maybe I misunderstood.”
Or maybe he told you that your sister was ignoring him and when you confronted your sister, she told you that it never happened.
He’ll say, “Huh? I misunderstood. I said I was worried that your sister might be ignoring me because she’s busy.”
Of course, there’s a chance that you both really misunderstood each other — or that you heard something different — but sometimes, this line can be used as an excuse to lie.
4) “So you’re saying I’m a liar?”
Liars love to make people feel guilty just because they suspect they might be lying.
They’ll do this when they know you have a big heart — like if you’re a highly sensitive person.
You see, when you hear these words, it’s hard not to feel bad.
So you’re likely to step back and say, “No, I’m not saying that. I’m sorry if you feel that way. Of course I believe you.”
And you’ll pretty much fool yourself and start believing whatever lies they’re telling you.
The next time a guy uses these phrases on you, take a deep breath but don’t back down.
Instead, say, “I want to understand you and get your side. I’m asking a question, not starting a fight.”
If they keep nagging you to avoid the conversation, that’s definitely a warning sign.
While a guy may say this phrase reactively when provoked, once he realizes it, a good guy will choose to respond calmly and avoid misunderstandings.
5) “Who told you?!”
Confront him about something he said or did (he doesn’t want you to find out), and at first he’ll deny it to death.
He’ll say, “What?!” This is crazy!”
Then seconds later, after a long pause, he’ll say, “Who told you?”
What’s a sign he’s lying is that when you tell him who, the character assassination begins.
He’ll say, “What a traitor!” and count all the times this person has lied, cheated, etc. He’ll even say, “Don’t talk to them again!”
He might even exaggerate and say, “I can’t believe you trust them more than me!”
The problem is, the person who told you is a long-time trusted friend. He’s just mad that he “betrayed” him by telling you.
A truly innocent person wouldn’t be that mad. He might even encourage you both to talk to that person to clear things up.
6) “What? Did I say that?!”
Say hello to the “forgetful” liar. He uses his “forgetfulness” to get away with lies once you catch him.
It’s frustrating to deal with this type of person. You wish you had a voice recorder every time you have a conversation with him because it’s become his habit.
And even worse when he says “What? But that’s what you said!”
He’ll make you feel like there’s something wrong with you for not even remembering the things you said.
It’s confusing, isn’t it?
Either he forgot (because he can’t remember what he said) or… he has a good memory because he remembers everything you said!
But the thing is, he’ll pick and choose what suits him to get what he wants – whether that means acting stupid or having a perfect memory.
Be careful. This guy can be dangerous.
He could be a manipulative narcissist who could ruin your life.
7) “Really? Do you want to start another drama?”
Women are more in touch with their emotions…and that’s great. But then some men shame them by calling them “dramatic.”
Instead of listening, making space, or making time for a real conversation, they avoid it by making you feel ashamed of your feelings and creating anxiety.
So if you suspect a man is lying—and use that phrase—he’s probably just upset because the topic is really sensitive.
He may not even be aware of why he’s so upset and is subconsciously doing whatever it takes to avoid it.
8) “Why do you have to know everything?”
When a man says this—and you’re not a creep or a suspicious person—he’s probably hiding something.
To a guilty man, even a simple question like “Who was at the party?” will sound like “Who were you kissing?”
The truth is, women don’t want to know everything unless they feel there’s a reason to know.
And a man who’s interested in the relationship, who has nothing to hide, will answer questions just because that’s what’s good for the relationship.
And it’s easy to do—just tell the truth.
The fact that he flipped out when you simply asked him a few questions means that these questions made him uncomfortable. And there may be a reason for that…
9) “Nothing!”
Ask him for details on something and he’ll be very vague.
He’ll make it seem like it’s no big deal even if it is because…well, he may be hiding something.
The truth is, if it’s really “nothing,” then talking about it shouldn’t be a problem, but why the strong feelings?
Well, maybe he’s already lied and doesn’t want to lie anymore, or he can’t come up with any new excuses.
So, he’ll say, “I don’t want to talk about it. It’s not important.”
Or, “Nothing out of the ordinary happened.”
He’ll shut you down and make you feel bad if you ask another question.
If he reacts strongly and tells you it’s nothing, trust me — it’s nothing. There’s something up and you need to dig into it.
Final Thoughts
Here’s what to remember: There’s no single statement here that 100% indicates that a guy isn’t being honest with you.
You need to know the context, you need to dig deep, and you need to have a heart-to-heart conversation before you conclude that he’s a lying, scheming psychopath.
These phrases are meant to guide you to parts of the conversation (and your relationship) that could be more meaningful.
And if you realize that he’s lying to you over and over again, it’s time to start thinking about ways to protect yourself!
He’s probably a pathological liar, and trust me—it’s better to be single than in a relationship with one.
