I have a problem: I don’t love my girlfriend anymore.
But I also have a solution: I will break up with her very soon and say goodbye forever.
I want to explain what led me to make this decision and help you decide if this is the right call for you, too.
I don’t love my girlfriend anymore: 13 reasons to break up forever
1) My girlfriend is annoying and critical
The biggest reason I don’t like my girlfriend anymore is because she’s annoying and critical.
In everything I do, she chirps at me and asks me why I’m wrong or bad or stupid.
Even when I’m away from her, she somehow seems to know everything I do.
She hits me with these passive-aggressive texts that drive me crazy.
Yesterday I was at the grocery store when I got this bouncer:
“Make sure you don’t buy that cheap bread again, I know you will (wink face).” Remember, we are trying to diet.
Just…damn it, man.
I think it would be funny if you found her cute. But her attempts to pretend she’s joking when in reality she’s just pooping everywhere is so annoying!
I confronted her behavior and issues. She has to deal with them alone: they’re not my problem.
2) My girlfriend makes me feel bad about myself
The second main reason I don’t love my girlfriend anymore is because she makes me feel bad about myself.
I firmly believe that I can’t blame anyone else for how I feel about myself, and I take responsibility for my emotional state.
But at the same time, I can’t help but notice objectively that she constantly belittles me, undermines my goals, emphasizes my failures, and makes me feel like a complete loser.
I want to be a winner and I want optimistic people around me.
It’s the opposite and I’ve become an emotional parasite who takes advantage of any little piece of success and happiness I find to tell me why I’m not worth it or why I’m going to screw up soon.
All this drama made me refocus my energy…
The truth is that most of us ignore a very important element in our lives:
The relationship we have with ourselves.
I learned about this from the shaman Ruda Yande. In this real, free video about cultivating healthy relationships, he gives you the tools to plant yourself at the center of your world.
It covers some of the biggest mistakes most of us make in our relationships, such as habits of codependency and unhealthy expectations. Mistakes that most of us make without realizing it.
So why do I recommend Rhoda’s life-changing advice?
Well, he uses techniques drawn from ancient shamanic teachings but gives them his modern twist. He may be a shaman, but his experience of love was not much different from yours and mine.
Until he found a way to overcome these common issues. This is what he wants to share with you.
So, if you’re ready to make that change today and cultivate healthy, loving relationships, relationships you know you deserve, check out his simple, real advice.
Click here to watch the free video.
3) My girlfriend no longer feels any physical attraction to me
Another big reason why I no longer love my girlfriend is because she no longer makes me feel any physical attraction.
When I say anything, what I mean is…any.
I look at her and see an average-looking woman in her early 30s and…that’s all I see.
I’d be more excited to have a random model in the Sears catalog (do they still make them?)
The last time we slept together was definitely over a month ago, but the sad thing is that I don’t really care (or fully remember) when it was because I’m not eager to have sex with her.
I’ve thought about cheating (a lot) and I don’t want to be that guy who goes ahead and does it while living a fake relationship.
I admit that another part of the reason is that I don’t want to feel like her bad behavior towards me is justified, and if I cheated it would be somewhat justified.
So I keep everything. And I feel worse and worse.
Why don’t I want to have sex with my girlfriend? I know it sounds strange.
All I can say is that although she is still superficially attractive, my declining actual feelings for her have made me cold to making love to her.
I feel like she’s an annoying roommate I’m stuck with and I can’t wait to get out.
I don’t want to put my penis inside an annoying roommate: would you?
If you are in this situation, it is time to break up for good…
4) My girlfriend no longer feels any emotional attraction to me
Next is emotional attraction and connection.
It should be part of any relationship if you ask me: romantic and non-romantic.
This is especially true when you are in love and want to live with someone.
But my girlfriend no longer makes me feel any romantic attraction.
When we first met last year I found her delightful: I was charmed by her laugh, her intelligence, and the way she saw the world.
Now this makes me feel embarrassed.
She makes me very unhappy and I consider her one of the most immature and misguided people I have ever met.
“You shouldn’t be with anyone who makes you unhappy.
“Men who are people pleasers tend to stay in the relationship even if there is a reason for them to leave,” says Michelle Devaney.
“That doesn’t make these men bad at love; They just want everyone around them to be happy.
If you are a man like this, then you should think about what makes you truly happy and full of joy. “
I couldn’t have said it better myself…
I don’t expect my life to be perfect or drama-free by any means. But I expect to be with someone I want to be with.
5) My trashy girlfriend talks to me behind my back
Now we get to the bad stuff, as the series highlights the stuff on the reel.
One of the main reasons I don’t like my girlfriend anymore is because somewhere along the line she got the idea that it was okay to talk to me behind my back. This is toxic!
I’m not sure why she had that idea, but once it became clear that she was dragging me down to flirt with her friends, I got really angry.
I’m not squeamish or anything like that, but I’m not here invested in a relationship to be the butt of jokes about some busybody on Instagram.
Yes, I do fart. Sometimes it seems funny.
Yes, I sweat a lot. Maybe I have a disorder.
But my girlfriend also does some things that aren’t considered Instagram story material.
Huge, nasty hair clumps in the drain, anyone? A menstrual cycle that would put a medieval witch to shame?
I don’t joke about these things with my friends, because I’m not an idiot.
But she never misses an opportunity to belittle me behind my back. I’m lucky to have sources within her circle of friends (one in particular) who told me about this trash talk going on…
The more I hear my girlfriend talk about me when I’m not around, the more I see who she is beneath the fake surface.
6) My girlfriend falsely accuses me of cheating all the time
Among what I mentioned previously about betrayal is that my girlfriend constantly accuses me of it.
I’ve never cheated on her (yet). This I can promise you.
Like I said, I don’t want to deceive her: I’d rather break up than live a lie.
But her constant accusations are hurtful and annoying. They also made me think about cheating when I wasn’t thinking about it.
If we approach an attractive woman within 100 feet, my girlfriend starts giving me all kinds of crazy looks as if I’m the devil.
I then had to play the game of pretending that I didn’t even notice the perfect ten who were just strolling through the mall food court or entering the store we were in.
Fun times.
I know some insecurities make my girlfriend suspicious and possessive.
At first, I understood it, but now I’m sick of it.
I’m not her therapist, I’m her friend. I’m done trying to be both.
7) A big part of the reason I’m with her is because of pandemic isolation
I met my girlfriend at the beginning of the pandemic.
The relationship with her was starting to take off and I thought “Why not?”
Well, now I know why not.
I feel like I’m living in a horror movie that’s been mislabeled as a romance.
Whenever I go out with her, I want to scream to strangers to help me and call the “love police” to save me:
“Help me! I’m trapped with a psychopath and she’s trying to crush my soul!”
Of course, there is no love police.
And there is no penalty for trying to crush someone’s spirit (there should be).
“Even if you’re not in the happiest of relationships or realize that the person you’re with isn’t your forever partner, it’s understandable that part of you might want to cling to the good things for now,” says Mary. Grace Grace.
I can see how this happened and why isolation made me stick with someone who wasn’t good for me.
But now I want out.
8) My girlfriend is emotionally abusive
My girlfriend is a bully. Not only does she make fun of me in front of her friends, but she also loves to see me suffer misfortune and disappointment.
There was a job I had been trying to get for four months and found out last week that it wasn’t going to happen.
She was in the best mood I’d seen her all year.
I asked why and she said “No reason”.
Fucking ogre.
I know it sounds paranoid, but I’m pretty sure she was gloating over my bad news.
On the contrary, whenever she had a win in life, I was there to cheer her on. Or at least to be.
Now I stand back, frowning.
Then we add in all the criticism, undermining, and gaslighting, and there’s only one conclusion: My girlfriend is emotionally abusive.
9) My girlfriend is an emotionally manipulative narcissist
In addition to being emotionally abusive, one specific way my girlfriend makes my life much worse is through emotional manipulation.
When she has a bad mood I have to answer him.
Even if it’s not about me, she puts everything on me.
This started after only a few months into our relationship and he is very tired and immature.
She only cares about herself and tells me that any concern for my goals and priorities is selfish and unacceptable.
I still care about her, which is why it’s so devastating when she uses her emotional state to manipulate me.
I feel like a puppet on a string.
Because if she says to go in one direction or do one thing I feel obligated to do it.
It’s crazy, and that’s why even though sometimes I’m still in awe of her beauty and the connection we used to have, I don’t love my girlfriend anymore.
10) My girlfriend manipulates me and controls me financially
My girlfriend has a great job and loves to show it off.
I’ve struggled with the business the past few years, and never heard the end of it.
She makes fun of me, criticizes my efforts to find work, and – as I said – gloats when I fail.
It’s as if she’s saying “I told you so.”
I don’t understand how someone could act like this to someone they claim to love.
But that’s how you act.
She also controls me with her money, sometimes sarcastically asking me if I want a loan from her so I can buy more fast food during the month.
Yes, it’s all about diet again.
Life sure is hectic with her by my side, you see…
11) My friend has a good reputation that makes me feel obligated to stay with her
Part of the reason I’ve been with my girlfriend this long (over a year now), is that she has a good reputation among my family and friends.
They constantly comment on what a “fantastic catch” it is.
My male friends make less favorable comments about her very attractive appearance.
Yes, yes, I get it: I scored a hot girl and we fell in love.
But trust me, as soon as you open the gift you will find a box of poisonous snakes.
I’m willing to say that to all the social expectations and ideas that others have about my girlfriend.
I know her, they just see her sociable appearance and beauty.
There’s much worse down there, trust me.
12) My girlfriend and I disagree about a lot of basic things in life
I’m okay with a different point of view than my girlfriend’s person.
After all, romance isn’t about being some kind of high school debate team.
But that’s not what’s happening here.
My girlfriend could start a world war because of the color of the shirt I’m wearing. She doesn’t agree with me on one basic thing in terms of life and priorities.
She loves to eat so much, she is obsessed with diets and organic foods.
I think spiritual exploration is not for me, she is obsessed with Eckhart Tolle and being in the “now”.
I wish I could explain to her that I would be more in the “present” if she wasn’t in it.
Sorry, not sorry.
There’s so much unsaid yet, and I can feel it all bubbling to the surface.
Soon the separation will come. These are not empty words. I have already got a new rented apartment.
I’m just waiting to tie up some loose ends before I say goodbye.
13) The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to stop
If I was having a bad few weeks with my girlfriend, I wouldn’t be writing this article.
It’s been months now.
Truth be told, I felt like I was in a death grip after two months of being with her.
I’m not sure why I stayed at that point, but if I had to describe the experience, it would be as if you were suffering from sleep paralysis and living in a nightmare where you can’t move and someone is coming to kill you.
If this sounds overly dramatic, trust me: you haven’t met my girlfriend yet.
It takes all kinds of genres to make the world go around, but she’s the only one I can do without.
I had a strong attraction to her at first, sure, but it waned, and now I’m disgusted that I took her seriously.
I’ve stayed up countless nights stressing over her and our relationship and I’m no longer confused about this.
She’s not the girl for me.
The best thing I can do is get out as quickly and completely as possible.
A clean break is what I need.
One of the best reasons to break up for good is if you’ve thought about it long and hard.
I know I have.
I’m done thinking. Now I’m ready to work.
