Let’s be honest. If a narcissist is good at something, it’s making you feel bad about yourself.

While revenge may not be the best look, giving them a taste of their own medicine feels empowering. After all, why should they have the right to make all the decisions when it comes to establishing power and control?

Let’s go over everything you need to know about how to make a narcissist miserable.

So how do you make a narcissist miserable?

To make a narcissist miserable, understand their behavior, ignore them, stick to the facts, say no to demands, respect boundaries, and focus on building your self-esteem.

You’re tired of the emotional abuse. You’re tired of questioning your feelings and feeling like your relationship is completely one-sided. You want to get back the semblance of your own life, and you don’t want to feel like a victim anymore.

Narcissists do everything they can to make life difficult for the people around them. Here are some proven ways you can get back at them.

1 Enlighten Yourself

Here’s the painful truth—narcissists want to keep you in the dark. They don’t want you to realize the depth of their cruel behavior. Instead, they expect you to tolerate their treatment without questioning it.

That’s why learning all about narcissism is one of the easiest ways to make narcissists miserable. Once you’re aware of their tactics—and can label them for what they are—you’ll begin to recognize problematic patterns in your relationship.

Growing this insight can be painful, sure. But it’s better than being naive and letting narcissists trample on your well-being. You have to know what you’re working with if you want to change things.

2 Ignore Their Narcissistic Behavior

As you know, narcissists thrive when they’re the center of attention. This rule applies even to negative attention.

Related : How To Make a Narcissist Miserable?

So, ignoring their bad behavior only hurts their already low self-esteem.

In many cases, they will act even more annoying to get your attention. But they will still lose their appeal if you can maintain a sense of the silent treatment.

3 Stick to the facts

Think about the way narcissists talk and tell stories to others. They often embellish their experiences, use high-stakes language, and emphasize their emotions and successes. It’s like a Hollywood movie where they are the undisputed star.

So, it makes the narcissist miserable when you do the exact opposite. They have less opportunity to argue with you if you just use facts.

For example, let’s say your partner comes home from the grocery store. You glance at the bags only to notice that several items are missing. You might be tempted to get emotional and say, “You didn’t buy most of the things you put on your grocery list. You only bought what you needed. That’s so selfish!”

Instead of using such emotionally charged language, you might consider saying: You didn’t buy apples, potatoes, eggs, or bread, which are at the top of the list.

Don’t expect a narcissist to suddenly apologize or admit their mistakes. In fact, they’ll likely become more confused or reactive.

But the more you detach from their emotions and stick to logic and legal evidence, the more miserable you’ll make them feel.

4 Say No

It’s amazing how two letters can shatter a narcissist’s fragile ego. Narcissists hate it when people stand up to them and when their loved ones set boundaries. So, no is a form of personal rejection.

So if you want to make a narcissist miserable, stop giving in to all their constant demands. Don’t just say yes because it makes you feel better.

5 Stick to the consequences you set

If you start setting boundaries, you need to enforce consequences. It’s not enough to say, Don’t criticize me. Instead, you need to say, If you criticize me, I’ll leave the house and come back to the conversation when I feel ready.

Then, to really make the point, you need to follow through on your intentions. Narcissists generally lack empathy for other people’s feelings, so they won’t understand where you’re coming from. That’s why it’s so important to be consistent!

The more consistent you are, the more miserable the narcissist will be. They hate feeling like they can’t get away with what they want. Your partner’s inflated ego has convinced them that they can engage in whatever spontaneous behavior they want to get their needs met.

But your boundaries prove otherwise. The more you stick to what’s appropriate and inappropriate, the less likely you are to give in to the narcissist’s ridiculous demands.

6 Being Better at Something Than Them

Let’s say you decide to try a new hobby together. You start playing tennis, knitting, or running. And let’s say you thrive at this new activity. You’re so much better than them!

In a healthy relationship, the other person wouldn’t care much about this. Even if they feel a little insecure, that feeling wouldn’t stop them from loving their partner or engaging in this new hobby.

But many narcissists simply can’t handle someone else winning. Therefore, they will try to sabotage your success (actively trying to put you down), diminish their desire to engage in the hobby (it’s stupid, and I don’t like it anyway), or withdraw from it altogether.

7 Demand Their Commitment

Want to know how to make a narcissist miserable? Just demand that they abide by your rules.

Whether it’s moving forward with buying a house together, getting married, or even adopting a dog, many narcissists struggle when they can’t define their timelines.

Of course, you should be absolutely clear about your motives before you ask them to commit. If you’re feeling sad and miserable now, those feelings will only intensify over time.

And what’s the point of fostering a relationship when you don’t want to be with them anymore?

8 Enjoy your other relationships

A narcissist wants to be the most important person in your life. They don’t want anyone else to have the power to make you happy or even make you feel miserable. In their minds, they are meeting every single need you have.

This mindset explains why narcissists tend to speak badly of other people in your life.

For example, they’ll criticize a beloved family member for being too bossy. They’ll despise your favorite coworker for being too work-obsessed.

Narcissists will work hard to convince you that other people want to hurt you, too.

Unfortunately, their efforts can be successful. If you’ve already started to isolate yourself from your loved ones, it’s time to consider how the narcissist is affecting you.

9 Build Your Self-Esteem

In healthy relationships, partners inspire each other to embrace their best selves and their true selves. You want the other person to succeed and feel happy with themselves!

But a narcissist operates by a different set of rules. In fact, if you want to make a narcissist miserable, you can do it by embracing your own self-esteem.

Narcissists feel threatened when someone in their life becomes self-confident.

They worry that they’ll lose some of the power they so covet, and they may drive themselves crazy in an attempt to bring you down.

So if you want to make a narcissist miserable, focus less on them and more on yourself.

10 Get Professional Support

Narcissists love it when you talk about them—to a point. They want you to brag about their successes and share their greatness.

Related : 11 Crazy Narcissist Lies They use to Control You

But the moment you publicly question their motives or express doubts about their character, they become unbalanced. That’s why seeking therapy is one of the quickest ways to make a narcissist miserable.

Deep down, they know that a good therapist will help you realize the full extent of their hateful egos. They also know that therapy can help you better understand the emotional needs you value in your partner.

So, you can expect them to attack you if you mention therapy. Likewise, they will likely badmouth the therapist and insist that he or she is incompetent or stupid. This is how you know the narcissist is scared!

11 Avoid Dramatic Reactions

Most people try to be polite when conflict arises. But, as you know, narcissists love chaos and arguments. They get such a thrill from making a simple issue look completely miserable.

As mentioned, narcissists love negative attention. Sometimes, they do things just to provoke others on purpose.

This is common when dealing with a malignant narcissist, but all narcissists do this to some degree.

So, if you want to make a narcissist miserable, avoid giving them this satisfaction.

Instead, act like they’re bored or completely uninterested when they use manipulation tactics. Pretend like nothing happened at all.

12 Use the Grey Rock Method as Much as Possible

If you have to maintain a relationship with a narcissist, pay close attention to how and what information you share with them.

Remember, narcissists track almost everything you say—they collect these details to use against you later.

So, if you don’t want to make a narcissist powerful, you need to stay away from sharing anything that can be twisted. The Grey Rock Method helps you deal with this.

Keep your interactions brief and boring. Respond in one word or phrase if possible. Try not to reveal too much emotion.

Basically, treat them the way you would a toddler who is having a tantrum.

Instead of engaging in drama, walk away and stay calm. In a sense, you are showing the narcissist that you don’t care at all about their drama.

13 Accept When Others Accept You

Just as narcissists don’t like to lose, they especially hate it when others celebrate your virtues and successes in front of them. This jeopardizes their ego and makes them feel miserable.

You can start by spending more time telling others about your accomplishments.

There’s no need to brag. But if you’re engaged in casual conversation and people ask you what you’re up to, don’t feel the need to lie or downplay your successes!

Keep in mind that this will only make the narcissist angry! They will likely respond by trying to outdo you (even if they have nothing to offer) or by talking to you negatively in other ways.

14 Outsmart Their Flying Monkeys

In the world of narcissism, flying monkeys are people who act on behalf of the narcissist to achieve their goals.

In simple terms, they want to validate the narcissist. To achieve this, they don’t mind doing the narcissist’s dirty work or even making themselves look bad.

Try to think of the flying monkeys in the narcissist’s life (and yes, you may be one of them). These people tend to be empathetic and quick to come to the narcissist’s rescue.

They often lack a sense of self or enjoy the drama associated with the narcissistic relationship. In many cases, they also have narcissistic traits.

Once you’ve identified these people, take proactive steps to break up with them.

Don’t tell them anything bad about the relationship (your words will get right back to the narcissist). And don’t try to befriend them (they’ll just pretend to be close to you to get bad information about you).

15 Cut Off All Communication

If you really want to know how to make a narcissist miserable, avoiding all contact with them is the best strategy.

Here’s why it works. Most narcissists rely on certain people to feed their narcissistic supply.

They need a constant stream of validation and admiration to feel important. But, of course, as you know, that’s never enough, which is why they alternate so often between intense love bombing and obnoxious devaluation.

Cutting off contact means stepping away from their manipulative games. In this way, they instantly lose a valuable source of narcissistic supply.

16 Treat Them Likewise

You can really make a narcissist miserable if you start acting like them.

Of course, you probably don’t want to resort to emotional abuse just to hurt someone else, but you can think of ways you can give them a taste of their own medicine.