Dealing with an obsessive ex is one of the most horrific experiences one can go through. What are the best ways to deal with obsessed people? What effective steps can you take when it comes to dealing with an obsessive ex? Let’s find out!
Some people cannot handle being dumped. They went crazy. They hate losing their “control” and “power” over their partners.
A dear friend of mine recently ended an abusive relationship. Fortunately, he realized that he was in a relationship with a narcissistic woman and that his only way forward was without her. Shortly after the relationship ended, he found a new partner – he was high, and was about to ride off into the sunset with his lover.
There was just one problem – his previous car had smashed its tires, so he couldn’t drive that far.
You see, my ex-girlfriend was always a toxic person and was good at manipulating and presenting herself in a different light when she was something else – extremely dangerous. She subtly enters his life again, trying to wreak havoc on his new, stable, and loving marriage.
It only took her 6 months to resurface from the bottom of the TAR hole and start spreading rumors about his new wife. She went to their children’s school and accused my friend’s new partner of terrible things: she claimed his new partner was endangering his children and spread rumors about her, like putting her in an institution.
Related: I Mistook My Covert Narcissist Husband For A Simple, Easygoing Man — The Crucial Sign I Missed
He confronted his ex-wife on numerous occasions, begging her to let them be alone and to stop using the children as a tool to get back at him. Yes, he has children from his ex-wife. However, she doesn’t want to listen – her condition is getting worse.
She contacts him frequently, even though they have agreed to communicate only by email. She’s invading his privacy – she wants to know what his plans are with his new wife, has their children spy on them, and then informs her.
His ex-wife is very devastated but she has somehow managed to survive so far. She reminds me of a lizard – a chameleon, she can adapt to any situation, knows how to blend in and portray herself as innocent, and no one would suspect her as a narcissist. But if you look closely enough, you can catch this snake by surprise.
My friend feels threatened, but at the same time he doesn’t know what to do – he has children from his ex-wife. You see, his ex doesn’t take “no” for an answer, but he doesn’t want to escalate things to the police.
He has asked her several times to stop calling him on the phone, and she still calls him. He asks her not to show up at his doorstep, so she does it anyway. She was recently caught on camera spying on their home: Her car was parked in front of his house when his new partner approached his ex-wife – and drove off.
He asked her to limit the conversation to issues related to their children only. She still sends him letters and emails asking about his private life.
Recently, she withheld children from him to “retaliate” from him, to cause problems.
#Who is the obsessive ex-partner?
Obsessive people are those who cannot let go of the past – they are unable to accept that the relationship is over. They call, visit, argue, cling – they are unable to “leave” their ex alone. These people are not well and can suffer from narcissistic, borderline, and other disorders.
They stalk, stalk, or threaten their ex. They can even vandalize their property, or escalate into violence. If left untreated, in extreme cases, tragedy can occur.
We must realize this in its early stages and take the necessary measures. At first, stalking may be harmless and include actions such as calling or texting you. However, the maniac may begin to feel more “confident” and his behavior may worsen.
They will force you into contact you don’t want.
If your ex does the following things, you may be a victim of obsession:
Text or call you when you tell them not to.
They show up on your doorstep when you ask them not to.
Giving you gifts when you asked them not to.
Connect with your family and friends and collect information about yourself.
Spreading rumors or publishing information about you and your new partner.
He refused to leave you alone when you asked them to.
Related: 7 Tiny Signs You’re Caught In A Narcissistic Abandonment Cycle With Your Partner
#How to protect yourself?
When dealing with an obsessive ex, you have multiple options on how to move forward.
Put up with it and act as if they don’t exist – block them and cut off all conversations (gray them).
Seek treatment and support from professionals.
Stand up to your ex and hope they change (which they won’t).
Keep a record of all bad and unwanted incidents and report them to the police.
Move away and start a new life.
Whatever you choose to do, try to stick with it – don’t fall into the trap of thinking that nerds might change, they may seem like they “stop” following you, but the truth is that they are just resting, waiting for you. To get comfort so that they can disrupt your life when you least expect it.
