Overthinking never makes you feel good, nor does it help you in any way. Here’s how overthinking affects your life.
“A mind that is too active is not a mind at all.” – Theodore Roethke

Although overthinking is something many of us (hey! me) do, it’s important to be aware of the negative impact it can have on our lives that can be swept under the rug and normalized. Overthinking can feel like torture, and if it’s chronic, it can significantly reduce our quality of life. It can numb joy and make us feel incredibly lonely. It can cause stress in our relationships or even destroy them depending on the degree of our overthinking and presumptive ways.

What I’m going to do in this post is provide some insights and perspectives to help you become more aware of your over-analytical ways so you can kick those destructive thinking habits and work on becoming more present.

I specifically use the word “present” because “being” is on the opposite side of the overthinking spectrum. When we are “in our heads” (overthinking) we are not there at all. One of the main tools for combating overthinking is finding ways to help us be in the moment. This post is for you to discover and create ways to do just that.

4 Symptoms of overthinking: How overthinking affects you

You feel less joy
When you overthink, you are not in the present moment. This is based on the fact that you cannot be in two places at once. If you find yourself constantly forgetting details of your environment and the people in it, chances are you are preoccupied with the world you have in mind.

If your goal is to be happy, what I can say with 100% confidence is that you will not find happiness by overthinking. On the contrary, a racing mind repels happiness.

Here are the other important things for you to know. Overthinking is a bad habit and habits can be changed. I know several people I’ve worked with who think there’s nothing they can do about their overthinking because “that’s just the way it is”

Not true my friend.

You don’t think much. It is not in your control. (Unless you allow it.) It’s the opposite: Overthinking is a habit you can deal with, and while you’re doing it, your life will change for the better.

Your relationships feel disconnected
Have you ever spent time with someone who was not present? Fun, right? mix.

It can be very frustrating to be with someone who isn’t really with you because they are so caught up in the complexities of their mind.

When you’re out in life and spending time in your relationships, but not really “there,” your level of connection, presence, connectedness, authenticity, and joy, in general, is compromised.

A healthy relationship requires two people to be fully visible to play and interact with each other. This is only possible when one (or both) parties are not present.

I understand that we are not perfect beings and sometimes we may have a day when our minds are in the land of (normal) Los Angeles. However, if “out” becomes a consistent state, there is more to look at here. Your relationships will be on the line if parts of you continue to show through in your relationships.

You feel chronically tired
It takes a lot of mental energy to think. Over time, physical exhaustion is a major side effect of chronic overthinking. If you are constantly feeling exhausted without any kind of explanation as to why, it may be that your racing mind is leading you to feel so exhausted.
You can’t sleep
This point is straightforward. Your thoughts can initially prevent you from falling asleep or wake you up in the wee hours of the morning and sabotage your ability to rest peacefully. As many of us know, lack of sleep leads to many other problems.

Now that we’ve discussed some of the symptoms that appear when we’re in our heads, let’s look at 6 practices to help reshape our thought patterns.

6 practices to help reconnect our thought patterns

Interact with people who can help you rediscover your existence.
Having relationships in your life that guide you toward rediscovering your being is invaluable. Just being on the other end of someone who knows how to take advantage of the present moment will transform you over time into someone who is more present with yourself.

(Reminder: We become more like the people we choose to be around constantly. Choose wisely. Their habits will become yours over time.)

Find these people in your world, appreciate them, and hang out with them as often as you can.

Focus on facts, not stories (these are big)
This one is nice and dry. The truth is the fact that it is “what is,” for worse or better. The truth is the truth of what is happening or what happened; It’s not your assumption or your story about it. The story is your creative development and you take a stand, which is not reality. (Puff! Got that?)

Getting smarter by discerning the difference between your reaction time based on your story versus the fact of the matter will silence your tendency to overthink.

Practice the Cognitive Behavioral Technique of “Thought Stop” (while acknowledging your emotion)
Knowing when you start “down the rabbit hole” with repeating thoughts, rumination and overthinking is the key to stopping overthinking. What I do in session with my overthinking clients is model stopping by guiding them away from their unhealthy habit of creating stories.

I do this by identifying the feelings (usually anxiety or fear) that are driving their overthinking and proceeding to close the “story” they have made up, that is driving their repetitive thoughts. It’s as if I’m picking weeds from the lawn. I choose what we need to work through (the emotion) while weeding out the false story, which often causes discomfort and pain.

We usually react more from our fear and story of what might be, rather than what is actually.

Move your body
To be a healthy person, finding a way to get active and get your blood pumping is a must. There are very few things I will tell you that are essential, and this is one of them.

Through movement and breathing, we can help difficult emotions and stress “push” our system. Without movement, we become sluggish, flounder, and begin to hold on to hard feelings that can make us sick. Move your friends’ bodies. it’s huge.

Be curious / step away from what you know
Whether it is a destination trip to a different part of your city that has not been explored, a weekend trip to a new place, or traveling out of the country, please go towards the unknown.

This is important because when we are drawn into our curiosity, we are simultaneously moving away from our routine and what we know. Our existence is required when we are not aware of our surroundings, which automatically brings us out of our heads and into our lives.

Find some healthy distractions
Find ways to engage in activities that help your brain focus such as crossword puzzles, a game of chess, reading, participating in a good movie, etc. These activities are like brain exercises and help focus your mind on something that will crush the tendency to ruminate, loop, or overthink. Our brains need exercise, too.

All and all, the biggest takeaway I want you to know is that you can do something about your overthinking. If your mind is controlling you, this is not how you should go about living your life. You are not stuck. Finding relief from overthinking is a matter of finding the right “tools”. Through awareness, practice, willingness to change, and a commitment to “doing the work,” over time you will find relief from your over-analytical ways.

4 Symptoms of overthinking: How overthinking affects you

We usually react more from our fear and story of what might be, rather than what is actually.

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