If you feel like a narcissist is spying on you, you’re probably right. Based on a narcissist’s need for power and control, spying isn’t impossible for them.

This behavior may shock or alarm you, and you may wonder how you can catch them. The first step is to recognize the different ways a narcissist might spy on your life.

So, if you feel like someone is watching you, it’s important to be aware of the strategies below. Knowledge is power!

How a Narcissist Spies

A narcissist has many tools in their toolbox, and they will use them when they feel the need to monitor you.

A narcissist may spy in order to maintain an advantage over you. If they know your secrets, as well as your every move, they can use them against you if necessary.

Related :Why is it so hard to say no to narcissists?

Narcissists are also quite insecure beneath the surface. So, they may spy because they think you’re secretly cheating on them.

Regardless of the specific reason for spying, narcissists believe they’re being very sneaky. They think they can get away with spying without ever getting caught.

OutsmartingNarcissists

Unfortunately for narcissists, they’re not always the smartest people in the room, even if they think they are. Once you’ve become wise to their ways, you can catch them spying.

By being aware of the tools they use to spy, you can gain an advantage over them. Pay attention to these strategies, and you’ll be wise to their tactics.

QuestioningYourFriends

When narcissists want inside information about your whereabouts, they’ll simply ask your friends. They’ll think they’re being very cunning, because they won’t ask questions like they’re spying.

Instead, they’ll pretend to be concerned about your safety. They’ll tell your friends that they’re very concerned about your lack of response lately, hoping your friends will spill the beans.

Or they’ll present themselves as very charming, simply engaging in friendly banter with your friends. As they gain your friends’ trust, they’ll step in and ask about your personal life.

Stalking on Social Media

Social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram give narcissists the opportunity to spy on you while hiding in plain sight.

Related : 9 Reasons Why You Are Still With The Narcissist

They will check your friends list, post history, and likes. They may even go as far as stalking other people’s profiles to see what photos you comment on and like.

If the narcissist is feeling particularly creepy, they may create fake profiles to check out your activities. This allows them to get all the information they want, without revealing their identity.

Monitoring Your Devices

Narcissists will use any form of technology to track your behavior and location. This can range from asking for your cell phone location, to installing trackers on your phone without your knowledge or consent.

Since the narcissist has a strong sense of entitlement, they also won’t see anything wrong with looking through your text messages, call logs, or emails on your phone or tablet.

They will also check your browser history on your computer or tablet, so they can see every website you’ve visited.

Reading Your Mail

A narcissist won’t hesitate to dig through your mail if they want to know something about you. They may intercept your mail without your knowledge, to see what you’re up to.

They’ll look at your bills, credit card statements, and even letters from close family. All of this gives them additional information about your private life.

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A narcissist may go so far as to dissect every detail of your credit card statement, linking all your transactions to where you were on a particular date.

Showing Up at Your Favorite Hangouts

Narcissists are experts at getting to know you. They’ll act like they’re really interested in your hobbies and activities.

Deep down, they don’t really care about your interests. They’re just collecting as much data about you as they can, so they can use it against you in the future.

Once they know everything you like, they’re ready for some sleuthing. They may “accidentally” show up at the coffee shop you frequent on your way to work, or “run into” you at your favorite weekend hangouts.

Physical Surveillance Techniques

This is a somewhat extreme example, but in more severe cases of spying, a narcissist may use physical surveillance techniques.

This may include installing a camera outside your home to see when you come and go, or hiding a camera inside to watch you in your home.

Related : Why Are We Attracted to Narcissists?

Keep in mind that installing surveillance equipment in someone’s home without their consent may be a crime!

Using Their Flying Monkeys

You may be familiar with the term “flying monkeys” if you have a narcissist in your life. If you’re not, flying monkeys are the narcissist’s little helpers.

They act as allies and enablers, helping the narcissist do their dirty work. When a narcissist wants to spy, they may send a flying monkey behind you.

This can involve a variety of different activities. The flying monkey may simply strike up a conversation with you, pretending to be interested in your life. Their ultimate goal is to relay information to the narcissist.

Alternatively, the narcissist may send a flying monkey to secretly spy on you, and then report it to the narcissist. The flying monkey may be hiding in the background at your workplace, your favorite restaurant, or even in your neighborhood.

How to Deal with Spying

Now that you’re aware of the specific techniques a narcissist uses to spy, you can look out for these behaviors.

You may have convinced yourself that you were imagining things, but hopefully you’ll realize that spying behavior is very common. If you feel like a narcissist is spying on you, they probably are.

Related : How do you defend yourself against a narcissist?

Keeping a close eye on you means that the narcissist can maintain power, control, and stay one step ahead of you. They feel entitled to every little detail of your personal life, and they don’t care if they have to invade your privacy to access it.

ProtectYourself

If you think the narcissist in your life is spying, there’s no need to let them get away with it. Keep a password on all your personal devices and accounts, and be careful about who you allow to follow you on social media.

You can also choose to expose their spying behavior, if you feel safe doing so. Remember, they may try to convince you that you’re imagining things.

Or they may try to say that your “bad behavior” means they should be watching you more closely. No matter what they try, don’t fall for their tricks.