Narcissists are truly toxic and vicious beings who leave no stone unturned when it comes to hurting the ones they love. They will not care at all about the harm they cause others, as long as their needs are met. So, when you finally realize their toxicity and call it quits with them, you need to know how a narcissist handles a breakup so you can be prepared for whatever they throw at you.
The way a narcissist handles a breakup is not normal, and the sooner you understand that, the better for you. This will help you not fall into the trap of the manipulative tactics they use so often.
So, what do narcissists do after a breakup, or how do narcissists react to a breakup? Let’s find out, shall we?
Related: Why The Silent Treatment Never Works And 6 Ways To Communicate Better
What happens when you break up with a narcissist?
When you break up with a narcissist, you need to be prepared to take an emotional roller coaster ride. It is by no means an easy task.
You may have already looked at other sources of information on this topic such as other articles, or the advice of a trusted therapist. All of them would have told you that the best course of action is to cut ties completely.
This has consequences. The narcissist is addicted to the ego boost they receive from you and like an addict with heroin, if you cut off their supply, they will start to experience “withdrawal” symptoms. They will immediately start looking for the next fix until they take one of two paths. They will walk away without thinking about all the pain and hurt they have caused you.
Or, they will immediately come back and go after you with a single resolve until they can get you back. They can’t handle loneliness and need to have someone to check on their feelings constantly.
Separation is a threat to a narcissist
How do narcissists react to a breakup? Ugly. If you stick to your determination to cut off any form of communication, this will automatically pose a threat to the narcissist. Like wounded animal, they will lash out for doing something crazy. Oh, the things a narcissist does at the end of a relationship!
They will pretend to be the best person on earth if that is what it takes and will not hesitate to stoop to such heights as blackmailing you with threats of suicide and self-harm if nothing else works.
The narcissist will keep coming back if there is even the tiniest chance of getting a fix from you or the way you react to their actions might give them enough to keep them going.
Understand that the narcissist knows very well that they are hurting you. But they simply don’t care about anyone but themselves. Even the slightest reaction from you will make them run, so be very careful.
Don’t underestimate the narcissist’s patience. The narcissist will not mind waiting if they think they can somehow put themselves back in the place they once held. They will continue to do so until the opportunity arises and return without any apology or explanation.
They may have secured the fix elsewhere but once that runs out, they will come back to you for the kick they get from knowing they have power over someone. Your act of eliminating all bonds will shake them to the core until they pull any trick they can come back with to re-conquer you.
But if the narcissist realizes that you are playing him, he will start avoiding you just in case you decide to reveal his true face to others. They will likely stop contacting you and since they have no scruples, they will be able to move on to another victim very quickly.
The way a narcissist handles a breakup is not only morally appalling, it can make you question how low they go, to get what they want.
Related: 5 Types Of Emotional Vampires: How To Identify Them and Protect Yourself
They will bounce right back to you
Prepare for a long struggle over your decision to separate. They will not like how it affects their social standing and that they will now have to find someone else to take their place.
They will suddenly be very nice to you and pretend that they have changed. They will keep coming back to “just talk” on one pretext or another but what they’re doing is trying to slowly manipulate you into falling for them again.
Like life, breakups are a cycle
The narcissist will deal with the “down” of the breakup by creating a cycle followed by the “rise” of getting back together. This cannot be avoided if you are in a relationship with a narcissist. Even if they leave, they will return. If they hurt you, they will apologize and go to great lengths to get you back only to hurt you again.
They are well-versed in using your kindness and love to their advantage. One of the things a narcissist does at the end of a relationship is treating you like a yo-yo. The whole act of hurting you and then putting you back is like an addictive game for them and they will need to keep doing it to be satisfied.
As mentioned earlier, do not interact with any of the scams they play. Even the smallest hike from you will give them satisfaction, so stay away and don’t feed the addiction.
Remember that you are numb
No matter how long you’ve been together, the narcissist will always act like they control everything you do. No matter what lines you draw, they will cross them and simply ask for your forgiveness later.
It’s nice to believe that they keep coming back because they love you and want to be with you. But more often than not, you are just a way to feed their addiction.
Remember how the narcissist handles a breakup, next time you are tempted to take her back because you think she has changed.
