Emmy Award-winning reporter Danielle Radin has some tricks on how to spot a liar in your life, especially in a relationship.
Daniel Radin has a three-step formula for identifying a liar.
After interviewing psychopaths, sociopaths, and narcissists throughout her career, she took to TikTok to share some tips on how to avoid liars, especially if their body language isn’t offering any clues.
Radin shared that experienced liars who can hide body language cues are likely to make up every day “like they’re ordering lunch,” because they “don’t care about lying to you.” So why don’t we subject the narcissist to a lie detector test?
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According to Radin, this is because “the heart rate does not increase.” And she’s right. Psychopaths and sociopaths often go undetected by lie detector tests because their bodies are not affected by their actions.
So, instead of playing truth or lying, Radin shared her tips on how to deal with these lies using a three-step formula.
- Ask your partner questions you already know the answers to.
This is a good way to get a baseline when you know what your partner looks like and sounds like when they’re telling the truth. Radin used the example of using a simple question like, “What’s the first restaurant we went to on our first date?”
If your partner can answer any of these personal and simple questions correctly, he or she has passed the first step.
Now, as Radin explained, “You have a basis for what he looks and feels like when he’s telling the truth.”
- Ask your partner a question that you know is wrong.
Now that you know what your partner looks like when he’s telling the truth, you need to ask him a question that will give you a baseline of what he looks like and sounds like when he’s lying.
This is probably a more obvious question because you need to be sure of lying. Radin used the example: “And after our first date, didn’t you go to your ex’s house that night?”
Radin explained that you should monitor answers such as “yes oh no” or if the respondent takes a long pause to think. She continued: “When a narcissist lies to you, it will be rehearsed, and they will not be surprised. They have already thought of every answer they can give.”
After that, you can ask them any question you want because now you know how they will act when lying and telling the truth
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- Ask them the question you want to ask them.
If your partner doesn’t answer the questions you ask and makes accusations, he or she is lying to you.
The biggest liars will defend themselves and trick you into believing they are a good person by presenting a good image. Radin detailed how to avoid this by listening to the words your partner says.
Narcissistic liars, as Radin described, like to “jump to assumptions” when faced with a question they don’t want to answer. Listen for phrases like “never in a million years” that they think will distract you and allow them to avoid the question.
They will also try to get rid of you by blaming you, especially on you. Listen for phrases like: “Do you think I would do something like that?” Or, if they feel backed into a corner, they’ll lash out at me, saying, “How could you ask me that question unless you’re the one cheating on me?”
Once you realize how your partner responds to right and wrong answers, if they become defensive and start making accusations or avoiding the question, you can almost bet you’re dealing with a liar.
When it comes to liars, especially good liars, it can be difficult to even use the test, but don’t despair. This is where you need to trust your gut. If you think you’re being lied to, you probably are, and the person likely to be lying has to prove otherwise.
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