There is music that the more I listen to it, the more I like it. As for narcissists, the opposite is true: the more a person is exposed to a narcissist (and their true personalities begin to emerge), the less we like them.
An article in The Scientific American talks about how popularity doesn’t last for narcissists. Narcissists have some qualities that make us love them… First of all:
They are generally attractive and care about their appearance. You will never see a narcissist wearing a stained shirt and ripped jeans.
They are always confident and sure of themselves. It’s comforting to be around someone who is sure of everything.
They know how to work with a crowd of people. They make sure they acknowledge everyone in a warm and charming way.
They have a great sense of humor. Most narcissists know how to break the ice with a joke or a funny story.
One sign of narcissists is that they are great at making a great first impression but terrible at maintaining relationships.
The problem is that narcissists also possess some unattractive traits such as:
An inflated sense of entitlement
An overwhelming need for admiration
Extreme vanity
Believing they are special
Masters of manipulation
Related: 8 Signs You’re In Love With A Narcissist Who Specializes In Deep Emotional Abuse
Once you know who a narcissist really is, you will want to stay away. They are not interested in your life and love their own voice so much that they don’t listen to anyone else (although they are very good at pretending to listen).
For narcissists, it’s all about them unless something goes wrong. Then it’s someone else’s fault.
Research conducted by psychologist Mitja Pak has shown that narcissists are more short-term, seeking immediate admiration rather than reciprocal admiration.
Narcissists are more popular when they have no acquaintances because of the charismatic signals they produce. When people first meet them, they thinly slice (make a quick decision about someone with very little information) and form an impression of the narcissist without any additional knowledge.
Related: How To Love Fearlessly After Your Heart Was Broken By A Narcissist
W. Keith Campbell, Ph.D., and Stacy Campbell have developed a new model of narcissism in which they discuss the emergent zone (which includes situations involving unfamiliar individuals, early-stage relationships, and short-term attachments) and the enduring zone (which includes situations of narcissism). People who already know each other, ongoing relationships, and long-term consequences).
It is the permanent area where narcissists’ popularity begins. As the relationship develops, more signs of a narcissist begin to appear, such as his arrogance and aggression.
Another study conducted by Mitja Pak tracked changes in narcissistic popularity over time. Research has found that narcissists have an overarching goal of maintaining a grandiose sense of self, which is supported by narcissistic admiration (assertive self-enhancement) and narcissistic rivalry (hostile self-protection).
Narcissistic admiration explained initial popularity, while decreased narcissistic admiration and increased narcissistic rivalry over time accounted for decreased popularity.
In other words, it doesn’t take long for people to find narcissists untrustworthy, and in turn, the narcissist’s instinct to exploit others (to feed their sense of entitlement) will rear its ugly, selfish head. This doesn’t exactly help make people think well of them.
Related: The 8 Stages Of Emotional Pain You Go Through When Breaking Up With A Narcissist
