People who bring you down aren’t just mean. There is a reason they do these things. But what can you do?

Have you ever been around someone who never seems happy with your accomplishments or seems mean? Well, you may not understand, and it will hurt.

On the other hand, they may insult you, and it will be clear that something is wrong. You may be experienced enough to know that the fault is not coming from you. But this is not understood by everyone.

Just know, there’s always something negative going on with someone who isn’t nice. No, you’re not perfect, and neither are we. But don’t fall into the trap of having low self-esteem just because a friend or family member seems to target you with constant criticism. Instead, try to find out the truth about their actions.

Understand the people who bring you down
When people try to put you down, it’s not your fault. But instead of getting angry, try to understand why they did it. It is important to know the truth so that you can benefit from the methods of dealing with these people.

1. A negative mindset
   Viewing life in a negative light can affect you and others around you. If someone has a negative outlook on life, once they are told the good news, they will find a way to change it.

The negative mindset has grown from a bit of negativity to a life of never believing in anything. If someone is trying to belittle your achievements with bitterness or criticism, it is because they have been doing so for a long time, and they are simply not satisfied with their lives.

2. Press down to go up
   Sometimes, people get insulted because it’s the only way they know how to make themselves look better. I know this sounds weird, but it works in a sloppy way.

It is easier to insult people than to work to improve your life. Thus, these individuals use successful people as stepping stones. If you say that you have received a promotion at work, these people may belittle this news by insulting your workplace.

3. Attract attention
   Have you noticed how young children sometimes scream for attention? You see, children understand that negative attention is just as good for them as positive attention – it gets their attention. Some adults are the same.

Believe it or not, some people put you in the gutter just to highlight themselves, as a disreputable and mean person. Yes, they are hated, but at least they don’t feel invisible.

4. Control
   Bullies at school, or in the workplace, aren’t bad scary people. They are people who put you down in order to retain a sense of control.

The truth about bullies is that they usually get bullied too. This is where they lose control of someone else’s insults. And so, when you meet someone like this, remember, they’re just trying to control how you feel in order to make you feel better.

5. It cannot be open-minded
   If you have ever witnessed a heated debate, especially a political one, you have seen a good example of how closed minded people can put others down. Some people are so unwilling to hear other people’s opinions that they resort to criticism and insults.

Instead of calmly reflecting on new ideas, they prefer to stick firmly to the way of faith and look down on opinions held by the opposition. It is not wrong to stick to your own standards and morals, but it is wrong to put people down because they do not agree with you.

6. Unable to connect
   I’ve noticed that when someone is unable to express their feelings effectively, they resort to being mean. Insulting people is easier for those who cannot speak openly about their complex emotions.

Unfortunately, this leads to hurting others rather than conveying the feeling. Once someone is offended, they often choose to break off contact. Either this develops or an argument.

How to deal with difficult people

Trying to deal with people who bring you down is not easy. Because they’ve been doing it for so long that it’s become a part of their personality.

However, in order to get along with others and influence change, it is a good idea to try to improve communication. So how did that happen?

Don’t retaliate

First of all, when someone hits you with a “cheap shot,” don’t insult them back. Think about how childish this neglect is and realize that if you do the same, you are training yourself to be like them.

Let it go, and instead, try saying something nice. It usually throws them off balance. Sometimes being nice makes them angrier, revealing the truth about their actions.

Know your worth

Understand that when someone brings you down, it is about them, not you. Don’t let someone’s criticism make you feel bad about yourself. Don’t take it personally because most of the time, their insecurities fuel the verbal attack.

Analyze the insult

When someone says something mean to you, learn to let go of the insult. Is there truth in what the person said? If so, just take those parts and learn how to improve yourself.

However, just because something they said might be true, that doesn’t give them the right to put you down. Understand and separate these things. Use criticism, but never let them judge you.

Tell them how you feel

If the insults are coming from someone you care about, such as a spouse, family member, or close friend, try telling them how you feel. Ask them how they would feel if you said the same thing.

Perhaps if you approach the situation from this angle, insults and criticism can be used to help them. This doesn’t always work out, and sometimes they may say they don’t care how you feel. If so, then just move on.

ignore them

Sometimes you just have to ignore people when they bring you down. Since some of them just want attention, they are looking for a reaction. If you don’t give them that reaction, the insults won’t work.

If you do this enough, they will stop disappointing you completely. It will be a waste of time for them.

Cut the relationships

If the people who bring you down are close to you, you probably can’t completely cut them out of your life. If they are not, you can. If you’re constantly being put down by someone you know, but who isn’t a close friend, it might be time to walk away from them for good.