Do you have a difficult relationship with your brother? It’s not just the sibling rivalry but their attitude towards you that makes you fall apart. Here’s how to recognize the signs of a toxic brother and how to deal with a toxic brother.
Siblings aren’t always the best part of growing up, especially if they’re toxic.
When people talk about toxic family members, they are usually talking about a father they don’t get along with or a mother who is trying to destroy their lives. But toxic family members can also include siblings. And it can be incredibly annoying.
Getting along with siblings is as difficult as it gets, usually because of the well-known “sibling rivalry.”
For people who have toxic siblings, it can take a lot of work to keep the relationship going. And more often than not, you find that you don’t even really want to try.
Read : The Codependency Dance: How The Narcissist Traps The Codependent In A Toxic Tango
Here are the 7 signs of a toxic sibling relationship
- The relationship is based on abuse
Abuse comes in all kinds and forms – mental, physical, sexual, verbal, and emotional. It can get to you and leave you feeling like you can’t handle your own life.
Such was the case for the anonymous Mamamia.com poster, whose two sisters have made him feel like a complete depravity for nearly forty years. “No one can make me feel like a loser,” they wrote. “No one can make me feel like a loser.”
Although you could simply classify this as your sister’s words, it’s still offensive. The label had been carrying him for decades, never saw a change, and finally decided to cut ties. This is not always the required procedure, but it is important to respect how you feel and what is best for you.
- They give you anxiety
It’s normal to feel a little anxious around family members, especially those you don’t see often. You may have struck a nice balance between having a sibling in your life, just not so much. that’s good.
When anxiety gets out of control or becomes pervasive, problems can occur.
As Genevieve Shaw Brown noted on AbcNews.Go.com, “When you live in constant anxiety that you never know or can predict how any interaction will go, it’s time to love yourself enough to let go.”
- Your brother is too crazy to talk to
You may have an eccentric sister or an eccentric brother, and that can be very charming. But when every interaction with your sibling leaves your head spinning around, and you find yourself getting into periodic, nonsensical arguments, you’re probably heading into toxic territory.
According to Shaw Brown, “When the relationship is dominated by crazy no-win games like the silent treatment and blame games and no-win arguments going around you, there’s no point in continuing this fight.” When this is the case, it may be time to cut ties, seek therapy, or at least step back for a while.
Read : WARNING: Is Your Relationship Difficult Or Actually Dangerous?
- Rivalry is no longer pleasant
My brother and I have completely different career paths, and it’s been a point of rivalry (at least for me). However, now that we’re older, I feel so proud when I hear about his accomplishments, and he’s always happy for me, too.
But some siblings never get out of that competitive phase, and that can cause some real problems as adults.
According to Gene Mirsky Leader of the Psychology Today website, “While few adult siblings have severed their relationships completely, nearly a third describe their relationship as competing or distant. They don’t get along with their siblings or have little in common, and they spend limited time together,” They use words like “competitive,” “humiliating,” and “painful” to depict their childhood.
If your sibling goes right back to their childish ways the second they interact with you, this may be a sign of some toxicity that you don’t want to be a part of.
- They only bring bad things into your life
If you are in doubt about your relationship with your brother, think back to your history and try to remember any good they brought into your life.
If everything is somewhat neutral, you don’t have to worry about it, because not everyone has a great relationship with their siblings. But if it’s all doom and gloom, fights, and arguments, take some time to think about how important the relationship is to you.
Read : 4 Struggles Only People Who Come From Toxic Family Will Understand
- They try to destroy your relationship with other family members
It is not uncommon for family members to stir fate to make people turn against each other. Call it love drama, or call it crazy – it sucks any way you look at it.
So consider cutting ties with a sister who tries to turn your mother against you, or with a brother who doesn’t want you to visit his children. It is not healthy for anyone.
- They are selfish
In a perfect world, family members would be there to help each other no matter what. Moving? I got it. Have a wedding? No problem. However, some family members, including siblings, can become quiet at the most inopportune moment. Think about how you would feel if you had a sibling who never came to help when it was needed. The answer is, “Probably not very well.”