You may realize that life gets better when you leave a narcissist. But sometimes we forget, especially if we’re going through a difficult time in our lives, or if the narcissist tries to get back at us out of love.
Narcissists are adept at putting their partners, and even ex-partners, in a state of stress and emotional turmoil. They use psychological manipulation and other manipulative tactics. This can trick us into believing things were better than they actually were, and that we’re responsible for many of the difficulties they caused.
The goal of this article is to remind you why life is better without a narcissist. This will help you avoid the temptation of getting back together. If you haven’t left them yet, this article may help you gain the courage to take that step.
If you know someone who has left a narcissist, or is considering leaving, send them this message! It will help dispel their doubts. What do narcissists pick up on and exploit?
Related : How Narcissists Benefit From “The Ikea Effect”
Let’s get to the article! Here’s how life improves after breaking up with a narcissist…
stress_reduction
Narcissists are stressful to be around, especially if you spend a lot of time with them. Even when they’re being nice, they can wear you down.
Narcissists expect you to shoulder all their burdens, but they won’t do the same for you. So, you’ll experience double the stress. On top of that, narcissists’ erratic behaviors exacerbate this stress.
Narcissists often deliberately create stress and anxiety in their partners because they know that a stressed and anxious person is easier to control.
Long-term stress is harmful to your health because your body goes into fight-or-flight mode, releasing stress hormones.
These hormones are only supposed to be active for fleeting moments. Unfortunately, when you’re in a narcissistic relationship, this feeling is exacerbated more than is healthy.
Related : What Makes Narcissists Jealous?
Once you leave a narcissist, your stress levels decrease. And your overall health improves. You may even find people complimenting you on your good looks. (This literally happened to me!)
Self Confidence Boost
Narcissists often undermine their partners’ self-esteem. Usually, they do so through constant criticism and belittlement.
These attacks can be subtle or overt, depending on the narcissist and the type of relationship. But no matter the method, the repetition still affects you.
With the narcissist gone, you have a chance to rebuild your self-esteem and rediscover your self-worth. Because there’s no one to hold you back when they feel you’re getting up.
It’s Time To Do The Things You Want
Narcissists demand your time and attention, and they are extremely selfish. This leaves their partners with little time or energy to do what they want.
Once you leave a narcissist, a world of opportunities opens up for you. No one is asking you to cling to them, or to get jealous when you do something with someone else.
Narcissists expect their partners to serve them exclusively. They don’t understand why you might want to go to the gym without them, or go for a walk in nature. In their view, you should do everything for them. And if they aren’t interested in these things, then neither should you.
Narcissists Block You
Narcissists live chaotic lives and prevent their partners from living a better life.
If a narcissist has a career, they expect all resources to go to them. Even if you have a better job than them, you won’t even look.
Related : What To Expect After A Split With A Narcissist
Narcissists are notoriously reckless with money, and they often hoard their partners’ money. This makes it difficult for them to save and build a solid foundation.
With the narcissist gone, you’ll be free to grow and advance. You’ll have the time and energy to take college courses to advance your career. You can save and invest in your future, and you can build relationships with people who truly care about you.
More Time For Friends
Most narcissists don’t want their partners to have friends because they steal their time and attention. Even worse, their friends may show them how badly the narcissist treats them.
So, the narcissist stirs up trouble between you and your friends, creating divisions, or they may cause disagreements right before you go out, leaving you feeling lost. Some even go as far as isolating their partners by moving them to a new area.
With the narcissist gone, you can see your friends whenever you want, without worrying about someone misbehaving or ruining your plans. So you may feel more connected and less lonely, even if you’re single.
In fact, it’s common for partners of narcissists to feel lonely because they spend most of their time with the narcissist. Because narcissists lack emotional empathy, they don’t connect deeply with them, making you feel even more alone with them than without them.
More Time For Hobbies
Once the narcissist is gone, you have more time for hobbies. Because narcissists consume all of your time, attention, and energy, hobbies are usually the last thing on your mind.
Related : How Narcissists Make It Seem Like You Are The Problem
Once you’re free of narcissism, you’ll have more time and energy to reconnect with your old hobbies and discover new ones.
No one will stand in your way, drain your energy, or discourage you. You’re your own boss, and you can finally do what you want!
Final Thoughts
Leaving a narcissist can be scary because they burden their partners, making them feel like they can’t live without them. But it’s all a bluff.
Narcissists know they’ll be the ones who suffer without you because they require so much attention. Their chaotic nature makes it difficult for them to maintain a stable life. So, they need you to keep them stable.
But instead of being grateful, they’re looking for a guarantee. Making you believe you can’t live without them is their guarantee.
Take your feelings out of the equation and consider what the narcissist brings to the table. Then, consider all the ways they hold you back. It might help to write them down in two separate sections, then compare.
Once you think about it logically, you’ll realize how little they do for you, and how much you do for them.
The end result is that they take much more than they give. At your expense. Therefore, leaving them is an obvious choice.
