
What’s happening in our world today? It seems that more and more people are turning into narcissists.
Whether it’s an increasing obsession with themselves, or a desire for control—it’s there…
…and it’s very scary.
Society itself is burdened with so much responsibility, and I don’t think the world is ready to ask the questions I’m about to answer.
If you want to know why, let’s start together. However, I warn you—it’s not pretty!
Narcissist
We all know them by now, don’t we?
A narcissist is the person we all want to avoid, but some of us are drawn to them, as if pulled into a black hole.
There’s an attraction to them that seems so magical, and before we know it, we’re sucked into a deep vortex, with no clear way out in sight.
They’re infatuated with their own self-importance.
They’re always right.
And they’re also always the victim.
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They hate a challenge.
They live for validation from others.
They are insecure, extremely jealous people.
They love to stir up drama, then pretend it’s nothing to do with them.
They love to show off.
So why are these people becoming more and more prominent in today’s society?
What’s causing this narcissistic boom?
Just look at how easy it is to put yourself out there.
If narcissists want to show off, they no longer have to rely entirely on the people around them.
Suddenly, Daisy and Mike at the office can have 2,000 Instagram followers or 500 Facebook friends.
Suddenly, all they connect with are their few neighbors on platforms where they post photos of themselves and brag about them to the world.
See how easy it is?
Help: My life is awesome! Let’s tell (literally) millions of people!
Why the rise?
Well, it’s easy.
There’s nothing hard about posting online.
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There’s nothing difficult about seeing content that gets a lot of likes and followers, and trying to beat them at their own game.
There’s nothing difficult about branding yourself in all the top-rated places possible.
It’s open to anyone to explore—and more and more people are falling into the narcissistic trap.
Society: Present vs. Past
Okay, before you think I’m taking you back to prehistoric times, I want to tell you that I’m not a fossil!
However, I remember a society before our current one, and it was very different.
People talked. They listened. They didn’t see a photo opportunity at the dinner table. They just sat, looked at their companions, and ate.
There was never a need to worry about, “I have to tell people online about this moment because it will show them how wonderful, kind, gentle, and compassionate I am.”
There were certainly no filters; we pretended to people that our lives were better than everyone else’s.
At best, we had photo albums that we would take out at Christmas and show families our holidays that year.
Now?
Everything is alive.
Everything is constant.
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Nothing stops. Minds never stop thinking about what others might want to see on their pages.
This validation creeps in, creeps in.
Do You Know Someone Who Fit The Map?
There will always be someone you know who fits what I’ve already written about.
If you can’t think of anyone you know personally, just look at the wider spectrum, at celebrities, or so-called influencers.
Social Media: “Look at me!”
Is there a worse way of life than relying on what you post online to validate yourself as a person?
I don’t think so.
But here we are, in the mid-20s, and this is how millions of people live in this world. I’m absolutely amazed at what you can post, and how you can get instant responses after posting it.
Some people spend all day scrolling through comments, talking to people who liked their posts, following and getting followers, and being extremely careful to please those they know and those they don’t know.
Comparison Game
The art of comparison isn’t one I particularly enjoy, but it’s one people engage in.
It’s unfortunate to think that your life is determined by other people’s tastes and behaviors.
If you’re not up to date with society, why not?
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You don’t have the latest grooming, why not?
You didn’t get that promotion, and apparently everyone else is, why not?
You wouldn’t go on vacation here or there, why not?
Your house isn’t aesthetically pleasing, why not?
Well, you or I may not care about these things, but a narcissist needs to succeed at everything they do. They have to do everything they see others doing online because they don’t just want to keep up, they want to be the best.
They compare themselves. They have to. This is how they play the “I have it all, you don’t” game.
If someone spends a weekend in a nice city, the narcissist wants to spend two weeks there.
If a friend gets a new $40,000 car, the narcissist wants to get a $70,000 car.
Being online and following everyone’s updates on their social media accounts makes it easier to spread your bragging rights and even match them.
Likes Obsessed
If you had asked me 20 years ago if I could have predicted the dawn of narcissism, I wouldn’t have contributed to the internet.
I saw it flourish and become an online encyclopedia. I saw the possibility of downloading music or movies. I’ve seen people connect and communicate for business.
The internet still is. But now it’s a haven for likes, followers, ostentation, comparison, judgment, trolling, ridicule, criticism, ignoring, arguing, bullying—and so much more.
All of these words also fit the description of a narcissist—who, without the internet, would never have been able to publicly display their toxicity.
The internet is a wonderful place—it’s where we connect! It’s where I share my news, opinions, and topics with you. The problem with modern society is that it’s made those who can’t stand others less acceptable.
It’s made it possible for those who want to show off to large audiences. It’s turned the art of taking selfies into an obsession with attracting likes, how to look perfect, and who to show it to.
Personally, this is one of the main reasons modern society has turned into narcissists.