Well, well, look who just showed up with a new partner?
Your narcissistic ex!
Before you start writing that much-needed sympathy card to their new target, you might want to think about what’s already been said about you.
You’ll find yourself stuck on a wall of shame and horror for things you didn’t do.
Everything will be magnified.
You’ll be wrong.
There’s no doubt a list of information—both true and false—that the narcissist will provide to their new partner.
And I have a copy of it, just for you.
When You Think You’re Free
It’s time to wave goodbye to the narcissist in your life.
You’ve been wanting to do this for some time, and your future is finally looking bright.
It won’t be long before the narcissist meets someone else, and the cycle begins all over again with them. It’s not your problem—thankfully.
Related : 10 Things Narcissists Do When They Meet Your Family
But it becomes your problem when your name enters their mouth.
Sigh Of ReliefFlees
Before you breathe a full sigh of relief—think about the facts.
Fact 1: The narcissist hasn’t forgotten about you.
Fact 2: The narcissist wants revenge, and will punish you in any way possible.
Fact 3: You can’t control who you are when it’s transferred to their new partner.
As I said, the sigh of relief is fleeting.
New Partner
And so we move on to what the narcissist’s new partner will hear.
Remember—at this point—they’re like little bear cubs thrown into the lion’s den.
They’re vulnerable, and they’ll listen to the noise. They don’t know you, and if they did, they’d be convinced that the version they know isn’t the real you.
MyEx…
“…hurt me”
You won’t be there to defend yourself, but let it be known that you’ll be on the “wanted” list for a number of reasons. The first reason will be how you hurt your ex.
No, that won’t be true, and you’ll know it. You will be fully aware and painfully aware of the truth in reality, but that won’t stop the lies.
Related : 12 Secret Ways Narcissists Check If You’re Still Under Their Control
A narcissist knows exactly what to say to make any situation shine a light on them and not you.
They will throw you and anyone else under the moral bus if it means they are seen as the victim and therefore beyond reproach.
“…left me”
Again – this may not be true, but if you leave them, you will likely reach a tipping point and end the relationship due to its toxic nature.
No one walks away from someone they love without a good reason, but narcissists don’t. They play and exploit.
If you leave them, narcissists will erase that from their minds and turn the tables on you.
What that looks like is massive amounts of empathy. Narcissists want and need that, especially from new people they meet, who they have a clean record with.
“…crazy”
You were never crazy. You wanted to meet someone you loved, trusted, and spent time with. No part of you wanted drama, yelling, or any other kind of abuse.
The narcissist is acting with heavy intent, and that heavy intent hurts you.
Now that you’re no longer together, there’s nothing stopping the narcissist from telling his new partner that you’re the crazy one.
Related : 8 Things Narcissists Say About Their Ex-Partners
This distracts from the truth and acts as a mask that the narcissist can hide behind. If he can’t be suspected, he can get away with his game a lot longer.
”…he’s a narcissist”
Ah, that old chestnut!
It’s a narcissist favorite, because it provides an accurate personal diagnosis of you from someone who knows he’s spent a lot of time with you.
The new partner will believe them because they’re the experts on you, right? They know everything about you, and more importantly, their experiences are valid.
But you know what really happened. You know what you went through.
I know what you’re thinking.
How dare they flip the script like that? How dare they convince a new, innocent person that you’re the problem?
The thing you’ve been trying to convince yourself you’re not.
It doesn’t seem fair—but nothing about narcissists is fair.
“… I used to get so jealous”
Have you?
It’s unlikely.
The reason you’re jealous is because it can’t be pinned on the narcissist. If you show jealousy, the narcissist can’t.
Are you starting to see how this works now? You won’t be given a chance to breathe or think honestly.
The narcissist paints a picture of you that doesn’t look like you at all.
Their new partner won’t know any different.
“… Liar”
Are you? I mean, you know you’re not.
The new partner will only believe what they’re told, and you need to realize that this will never work in your favor.
Related : 13 Weird Things Narcs Do When They’re Jealous
There has to be someone lying, and the narcissist can’t be the liar.
“… He’ll do anything to get between us”
The narcissist likes to point you out as a threat for several reasons.
They want to keep believing they are wanted, so that their new partner feels lucky to have them.
They love seeing two people compete with each other.
They enjoy creating drama where there is none, just for their own amusement.
They want you to stay in their lives in some way, so they can continue to play with your emotions and bring you down.
Don’t believe it.
“…he still loves me”
Hmm…does he love me? You know what? Even if you still have feelings (and those feelings are likely to be attachments rather than feelings), it won’t matter if they are seeing someone else.
In time, you will get over whatever happened between you, and meet someone else who makes you feel loved and special.
This shouldn’t be a reason for you to play the role of someone who doesn’t love me anymore and my heart is broken.
No one deserves that.
“…he used to criticize me”
If only you could shine a light on the truth, right there. The world would be a much better place.
But you can’t.
Related : 13 Red Flag Behaviors When Narcissists Meet Your Friends
The new partner will become the ultimate victim, and over time they will realize that this, along with all the other lies told about you, is how the narcissist controls and manipulates them.
Any criticism will eventually be discovered, and you will not be held accountable or held accountable when their relationship falls apart…
…it will fall apart.
