Showing yourself that you are loved has to be one of the best feelings, right? Not only is it nice to have someone you love show you love and affection…

… it’s also nice to know that feelings can match words.

That’s what keeps relationships healthy and lasting. People need that consistency, but that’s all the way with narcissists.

Sure, they can show you that they love you, but let’s question love here today.

Besides that – let’s question why the ways they show you that they love you are so twisted.

What is love?

Don’t ask a narcissist, that’s for sure. They won’t give you the answer you need, but they will say all the right words.

I think love is a great excuse to show someone that you love them.

If only narcissists thought this way, and weren’t so twisted.

10 Twisted Ways Narcissists Show Their Love

1. Sex

Breaking News:

Sex is not love.

Yes, it’s a beautiful and intimate way to show your deep love and care for someone. Sex is part of loving someone, but it shouldn’t be the only way to show your love.

Related : Oops Did I Marry a Narcissist?

Ultimately, it’s a physical act that makes you feel like you’re the only two people on the planet in the moment.

But being with someone that way doesn’t mean you want to be with them for the rest of your life.

When sex is over and you’re both satisfied, it doesn’t mean you’re with someone whose words match their feelings. Narcissists love sex because it’s known as an “act of love.”

But it doesn’t have to be love.

2. Dinner is expensive

Going to a five-star restaurant for a meal after waiting six weeks for a reservation isn’t love.

Narcissists believe this is because they have great emotional depth and assume that something expensive must constitute feelings.

This is not true.

But those who get involved with a narcissist will love it, as the exhaustion of eating such a lavish meal will leave them feeling eternally grateful.

This is why many victims get involved with narcissists in the first place –

Victims come from an environment where any kind of attention or affection was extremely delayed and sought after.

They had to work to earn love; any small bit of it would serve as the validation they needed to feel loved.

3. Lavish Vacations

Lavish vacations are often accompanied by photos that are all over social media. Now, look at it this way:

Narcissists want to find an excuse to splurge. If it’s a lavish vacation, they won’t want to go alone because it will look pathetic.

Instead, they drag you along to make it look like they’ve got the perfect relationship. They just want to impress with status.

You’re being taken advantage of on this vacation, and the narcissist knows that’s your only job.

This isn’t out of love.

4. “Look what I offer!”

Raise your hand to see how many of you have heard a narcissist say this?!

Of course I love you. I wouldn’t go out and work hard to provide you with the perfect home and everything that goes with it, would I?!

So what happens? Victims of narcissistic abuse assume that love is like giving.

In a healthy relationship, this would never be used as a reason to show love, and it certainly wouldn’t be used to make the other person feel bad.

Look at all I do for you, why wouldn’t you be grateful?!

Honestly, statements like this only serve to create feelings of guilt in victims. What almost always happens is unnecessary apologies.

5. Dirty Money

Money is where the narcissist loves to show off more than anything else!

Love isn’t money, but try telling them that. For them, giving you money to treat yourself to a new sweater or pair of shoes is their way of saying, “I love you, see?”

Money is easy. It’s the currency of the narcissist, because it symbolizes status.

Time, honesty, patience, and respect aren’t (according to the narcissist!)

6. Constant Texting or Calling

You can’t even get a few hours to yourself without being bombarded by a narcissist’s contact.

They think they’re showing you how much they care, but they’re actually ensuring that wherever you are, you won’t be forgotten.

Related ; Is The Narcissist You Know a Psychopath?

It stems from their deep-seated insecurity, which, frankly, isn’t your problem.

However—texting and calling will be pure art of real-time love bombing!

7. Saying it!

I love you.

I love you, have a nice day.

I love you, have a nice night.

See how that can roll off the tongue?

It is incredible to me how narcissists can say this and yet act so differently from everyone else.

Yet victims are often searching for anything to understand that they are loved. They may have spent years, perhaps their entire lives, not believing this about themselves.

Of course, these words are easy for a narcissist!

8. False Security

The security of having a roof over your head means nothing when abuse lurks beneath it.

It’s all fake. Feeling like they’re protecting you or keeping you safe from danger that doesn’t exist will leave you feeling paralyzed and dependent on them only.

You won’t want to expand into the real world because their security feels like cast iron around your heart.

Well, if that’s the case, no love can get in or out.

Something to think about.

9. Breadcrumbs

Any small show of affection will come from a narcissist when they know they need you back.

Usually, breadcrumbs come after a period of abandonment where you feel lost and unappreciated.

Breadcrumbs can be as small as a compliment, or offering you a round of toast while they’re making their meal.

They’re small, but they work when the other person’s expectations are so low that literally “anything will do.”

10. Mirroring

Mirroring is not talked about enough, but this is how narcissists make you feel like you “fit in” with them, that they “get you.”

Related : The One Phrase That Will Leave Any Narcissist Powerless!

Finishing sentences, mirroring you when you brush your hair out of your face, or simply telling you things like, “That exact thing happened to me too,” or “I feel the same way you do.”

You don’t fit in, and you don’t have everything in common, so try to avoid hearing, “It’s the same to me,” as a way for them to like you and feel lucky to know you.

It’s just a ploy for you to bond with them.

Same old tricks!