Wait… what?

I know. It seems out of this world that someone who works so hard to get you to love them actually wants you to end up hating them.

Narcissists work according to their own plan, and it’s not one that I promise emotionally healthy people will fully understand.

The hatred you end up with is part of their game, and I want to take a moment to tell you why.

When you think it can’t get any worse…

Confusing, right?

You’ve probably read countless times that all narcissists are desperate for your love.

They want your attention and validation.

They want to feed their ego with your misery and submission.

They feel good knowing that you give them everything, and leave yourself with nothing.

Have you ever considered how narcissists sometimes want you to hate them too?

Yes, it does seem confusing. It shouldn’t make sense that a toxic, controlling person would want to alienate you in some way, but trust me when I say it’s very true.

There comes a point where it is in the narcissist’s best interest for you to turn and hate them…

…But why?

It’sNotJustLove

There comes a point where narcissists know you don’t have much love to offer them.

You get them, and you realize what kind of person you are dealing with. They know you can no longer tolerate their abuse, and it’s a race against time to see who can come out the winner here.

Narcissists will always want to win – so this is when you need to be prepared for the love (or whatever you thought it was) to disappear completely.

What replaces that love when a narcissist wants to get rid of you is:

• Outright hate
• Getting rid of
• Not caring
• Hateful comments
• People turning on you
• Spreading lies about you
• Activating your triggers
• Pointing out your insecurities and throwing them out there

Narcissists do this so that you end up hating them. And they will do a really good job of hiding all of these acts of hate because they don’t want anyone else to suspect.

Related : You’ll Never Guess These Texting Tricks Narcissists Use to Control You

This is a really dangerous area to walk into.

But what happens next is even worse.

Prepare to Stand in Line

You are officially in line.

And you may be wondering, why stand in line?

Well, the game for the narcissist doesn’t stop there.

Think about it, and I really mean this, because if you dig deep, you may be one step ahead of the narcissist.

The game that is being set up is the game that you are expected to participate in, yet you may not be aware of it until it’s too late.

What Happens When You Hate It?

When a narcissist wants to get rid of you, they will make your life a living hell.

You have two options here.

Option one – you can walk away and they will cry and act like a victim because you left them. People will think you are the old, tough guy.

Option two – you can fight back, and it seems like everything the narcissist tells others about you is true. You are fierce. You are impossible. You are stubborn. You are argumentative. You are dramatic.

Do you see how none of these scenarios will work in your favor?

However, the narcissist is there, inciting you to hate him and show it to the whole world.

In this case, he will put you where he wants you, so he can make a meal out of your reactions.

What Narcissists Do With Your Hatred

See? I told you. They can’t stand me. I don’t know what I’m doing and it’s so wrong.

I’m trying my best, but I can’t seem to get it right.

These are the phrases that narcissists throw at people. Family. Friends. Strangers if they have to. Your hatred is the gift they need to give everyone.

Related : Watch Out: These Phone Habits Are Deadly Signs of a Narcissist

The people who want their sympathy, and the people who are dying to convince them that you are the problem.

If you make it clear to the world that you hate the narcissist, the narcissist will be able to come across as the good guy in return, and this plays into the victim mentality.

You are giving them exactly what they want, right? So you hate them, they deny it, and you look crazy.

Breakup? Move on? Get Rid!

Usually, the intense desire to hate the narcissist only comes when you decide to break up after a long period of time together.

This whole process can be a shock to the system when a lot of abuse has previously happened behind closed doors. Now the narcissist will take your hatred to them and tell the world.

When this happens, you may end up realizing that you are tied to the narcissist forever if you have children and/or grandchildren.

For these people, it can be tough. You don’t feel like you are getting a break from all the misery, and instead new tricks will be unleashed.

It’s not easy for a narcissist to know that they are hated so much, but by making sure that you hate them, they can do what they can to deal with these intense feelings and be the innocent party as a result.

Standing Up

You know you’re right. You know you’re a good person. All of these things start to fall into doubt when a narcissist is around simply because of the way they insist that you feel the way you do.

The hatred you feel comes from:

Resentment at the way you’ve been treated all this time

How they’ve talked to you or your friends and family

The way they’ve tried to punish you for things you didn’t do wrong

Expecting you to play by their rules

Violating your boundaries the entire time you’ve known them

The feeling that you’ve wasted so much valuable time trying to make it work with someone who is unwilling or unable to compromise

In short – you’ll never be free from a narcissist until you accept all the chaos that comes with knowing them.

Standing your ground is the only way you can make sure you don’t let their puzzles win, and don’t allow yourself to be used as their tool to gain sympathy.

Narcissists want to:

• Be the victim
• Get other people’s attention
• Look like they’ve been wronged in some way
• Watch you suffer
• Watch you go through real emotional pain

We shouldn’t take narcissism seriously, and if the narcissist you know is making sure you hate him, it’s because he has a bigger plan to make you suffer…

…so be prepared!