Narcissists don’t play by the rules, and if you want to make them obsessed with you, you have to beat them at their own game.
How to make a narcissist obsessed with you? I’ll warn you, this is not going to be an easy task.
But if you’re willing to put in the effort, and abandon traditional romantic ideals, you can make a narcissist whine like a puppy, and eat out of the palm of your hand.
However, it’s a risky endeavor, but if you’re a risk-taker, keep going. If you want to know how to make a narcissist obsessed with you, keep reading!
How to Get a Narcissist’s Attention?
Narcissists are attracted to everything shiny, they’re very vain, and they enjoy the finer things in life. So, if you’re looking to get a narcissist’s attention, start here:
Be as Physically Attractive as Possible
Everyone wants what they can’t have, but narcissists take it to another level. They want the best partner, the best car, the best house, the best everything. They have to be number one at all times, or they won’t feel complete.
If you’re serious about how to make a narcissist obsessed with you, then looking as physically attractive as possible is essential. Make sure you look your best at all times, even if you’re just going to the grocery store.
Related : How To Make a Narcissist Addicted To You?
When a narcissist sees how much attention you’re getting, you’ll slowly start to draw them into your web of awesomeness.
IgnoreThem
Narcissists are strange characters, although they relish the attention, when you ignore them, they will chase you because you have the nerve to ignore them.
A narcissist wants to know who you think you are and because you’ve ignored them, they will start using every trick possible to get your attention. If you’re going to use this tactic… be prepared for a stage show.
ActArrogant
This trick can backfire, depending on the type of narcissist you’re dealing with, but you can try it and see what happens. Well, narcissists enjoy destroying people’s self-esteem.
They can detect low self-esteem the way a shark smells blood. This is the direction they usually go because they know it will be easy to get.
But there are some narcissists who like more of a challenge and will target the confident person because it is a victory for them when they break them. So, if you want to see a narcissist obsessed, act like you have some self-esteem.
3 Ways to Make a Narcissist Obsessed with You
If you want to know how to make a narcissist addicted to you, you may need to do some things you have never done before and play some emotional games. Here are some tips:
1 Don’t Commit
The moment you commit to a narcissist, they will turn against you. You see, they are very strategic people, and they enter into relationships with one intention.
This is to make you addicted to them so that you become a constant source of narcissism for them. There are three stages to their strategy:
- Love Bombing Stage
The love bombing stage occurs at the beginning of the relationship and they invest a lot of time and money into making their victim fall in love with them. Love bombing is the reason why narcissists have a reputation for being charming.
They will take you to nice restaurants, buy you gifts, take you on vacation, and call and text you all the time telling you how beautiful you are.
You will think you have found the man/woman of your dreams, and you will invite them to meet your friends and family who will love the narcissist just as much as you love them.
Before you know it, you have fallen into their trap. Once they know they have you, they move on to the next stage.
- Devaluation Stage
Once you become addicted to what you have been tricked into believing is their loving nature, the narcissist will turn on you so hard and so fast that you won’t know what hit you.
They will literally mess with your brain’s chemical makeup. Let me explain… Dopamine is the feel-good hormone, anytime you feel happy, the brain releases this chemical into your bloodstream.
Dopamine plays a major role in addiction, whether a person is using drugs, alcohol, or is addicted to shopping, what the individual is actually chasing is the dopamine high, they want to feel happy all the time.
When an addict has a meltdown, they feel depressed, and they go out looking for that high again. Abusive relationships work the same way, the only difference is that the addiction is a person.
The narcissist made you feel happy and giddy while they were bombarding you with love. Now, they are going to bring you down by emotionally and verbally abusing you. Let’s say it’s your 6th wedding anniversary and you’re going out for dinner.
You decide to wear the same red dress you wore on your first date. As you put on the dress, you remember how he showered you with compliments.
Related : Do Narcissists Feel Guilt?
You remember every last word, telling you how the dress suits your body shape and skin tone.
But today, when he comes to pick you up, the first thing he says when he opens the door is, “Don’t wear that dress again, it makes you look a bit chubby, and the red on your skin makes you look too pale.” Now you’re flustered, and as you change your clothes, your self-esteem is slowly dropping.
He knows you’re a bit depressed because he’s well aware that you wore that dress in anticipation of hearing the same compliments from him. Even when you show up in a new dress, he doesn’t acknowledge you.
The date is a bit inappropriate, and you spend the night worrying that he’s no longer into you. Now you start acting desperate, and that’s exactly what he wants you to do. You’ve now become the perfect source of narcissistic supply because you’re overcompensating to gain his approval.
He’ll know exactly when to start building you up again, and then he’ll tear you down again. So now you’re completely addicted to him, thrilled when he’s honest with you, and annoyed when he’s rude and mean to you.
- The Elimination Phase
Once he’s completely drained you, and you have nothing left to offer, he’ll dump you in the most cruel and cold way possible. If he moves into your house, he’ll simply pack up and leave. You’ll come home from work to an empty house.
If he moves into his house, he’ll pack your stuff while you’re at work, leave it outside the front door, and change the locks! Once you’re out of the picture, he’ll move on to the next phase.
What you don’t want is for him to go beyond the love bombing phase. He’ll lure you in to see if you’ll take it. Remember, the bait is the nasty comment or insult.
Act like what he says doesn’t bother you at all. Laugh it off, but whatever you do, don’t get into a confrontation about it.
When you don’t take the bait, he’ll keep on bombarding you with love, and every time, he’ll drop the bait to see if he can lure you in.
2 Flirt with others
When the narcissist is around, make sure to flirt with the opposite sex. Don’t overdo it, and be subtle, but obvious. For example, you can keep complimenting him, or lightly touch his arm during a conversation.
The narcissist will get angry like a naughty child, and he may even start an argument, but this will only motivate him to work harder to be the center of your world.
3 Don’t compliment them
I mean never! The moment you start complimenting a narcissist, he’ll rub his hands together in glee, thinking he’s one step closer to making you addicted to him.
Instead of complimenting the narcissist, highlight their flaws in a clever way.
Deep down, narcissists are terribly insecure. They put on a facade that they love themselves completely and that they are the best thing since toast, but it’s all just a facade.
So you can say something like, “Wow, I really like the way you wear tight shirts even though your belly is a little on the rounder side.”
Related : 8 Ways How Narcissists Treat Their Exes
Or, after you take a selfie together, look at the photo and say, “Your confidence levels are unmatched. I would never take a picture with my bad side on.”
4 Never Make Time for Them
During the love bombing phase, the narcissist will want to spend all of his time with you. His goal is to spend as much time complimenting you as possible so that you will be attracted to him as quickly as possible.
As you’ve read, once you are attracted to him, he starts to devalue you. So, the less time you spend with the narcissist, the better for you because he will continue to try to get you.
Every time the narcissist calls you to set up a meeting, tell them that you are busy on that date, and that you will call them back when you have some free time.
The narcissist will not be very happy about this, and will feel neglected and abandoned, but this will put them on alert.
How to Make a Narcissist Addicted?
By rejecting the addiction! It sounds simple, but it is not. The only way to keep the narcissist chasing you is to not give in to the love bombing phase.
It is also important to remember that you will not keep the narcissist addicted forever.
Eventually, they will go where they can get supplies. Remember, narcissism is a mental illness, and without a narcissistic source, they cannot function.
They will enjoy the chase for a moment, but in the same way that they get rid of their partners when they no longer have any use for them, they will get rid of you once they realize that you will never be a victim.
So keep that in mind as you seek to make the narcissist obsessed with you.
Can a Narcissist Become Obsessed with Someone?
Yes, but for the wrong reasons. The only way a narcissist would become obsessed with someone is if they can’t attract them.
It won’t be because they think the individual is so awesome that they want to be around them all the time. One symptom of narcissism is their lack of empathy.
Lack of empathy can manifest itself in a number of ways, one of which is that they don’t have the ability to be truly attracted to someone because of their personality.
You’ll never hear of a narcissist falling in love with someone because of their personality. So if you’re looking for someone to be obsessed with you for natural reasons, you’re not going to get that from a narcissist.
Why Making a Narcissist Obsessed With You Might Not Be a Good Idea
Well, in extreme cases, this is a dangerous game. When a narcissist becomes obsessed with you, it’s for the wrong reasons.
Related : How To Make a Narcissist Come Crawling Back?
When they can’t get past the love bombing phase, they may start using other tactics to break you down. In other words, the only reason a narcissist is obsessed with you is because they couldn’t get you addicted to them.
Your flexibility will pique their interest, and you will become a project they are determined to complete. Secondly, do you really want to waste your time and energy playing this sick emotional game?
You will never be able to be yourself around them, and you will always be on high alert trying to outsmart the narcissist. Eventually, you will burn out.
FinalThought
Getting a narcissist to love you is hard enough, not to mention obsessive! You will need to be on your best behavior at all times, and you cannot falter or your plans will fail miserably.
You see, narcissists do not live in the real world, they are constantly scheming and manipulating, so you need to be ten steps ahead of them.
Be careful, sometimes it will feel like you are fighting a losing battle because the narcissist will not budge.
But if you are relentless, in the end, you will get exactly what you want!