You’re too sensitive!
I don’t remember it that way!
According to experts, narcissists often use the same phrases to shift blame and manipulate you. If they repeatedly use some of the following phrases, you should start to suspect they’re a narcissist.
We asked experts from our Facebook group about the phrases narcissists use and they revealed these 11 phrases narcissists use.
You’re too sensitive
This minimizes your feelings and invalidates your concerns.
When a narcissist tells you, “You’re too sensitive,” they’re effectively minimizing your feelings and dismissing your concerns, making you question your emotional responses.
They’re trying to control the narrative, making you the “problem” instead of addressing their behavior. It’s their way of evading accountability.
I don’t remember it that way
This is a typical emotional manipulation phrase designed to make you question your reality.
Just as undermining your feelings is a common tactic, manipulating your perception of past events is also a common tactic, often heard in the phrase “I don’t remember it that way.”
This phrase, full of emotional manipulation, is a tool that narcissists use to make you doubt your reality, doubt your memory, and feel insecure about your judgment.
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When you’re certain of an event, and they deny it with this phrase, it’s not about genuine forgetting.
It’s a calculated move to control the narrative. Their goal is to throw you off balance. If you’re always questioning your memories, you’re less likely to challenge their version of events.
It’s always about you, isn’t it?
They use this to divert attention from their actions or behaviors and shift the blame onto you.
Another manipulative remark that narcissists often resort to is “It’s always about you, isn’t it?” in order to shift the focus from their mistakes to your perceived selfishness.
This cunning tactic deflects attention from their actions and behaviors while placing the blame on you.
By making such a statement, they are insinuating that you are selfish or arrogant, thus diverting the conversation from their questionable behavior.
It’s a classic case of projection, where the narcissist projects their negative traits onto you. In their twisted perspective, you are the one at fault—not them.
I’m doing this for your own good
This statement is a way to justify controlling or harmful behavior.
To shift gears a bit, let’s look at the phrase “I’m doing this for your own good,” which narcissists often use to justify their controlling or harmful behavior. This is a classic manipulation tactic, where they make you believe that their actions, no matter how painful, are for your own good.
It’s a way for them to exert control while avoiding responsibility for their actions. They are not hurting you. From their perspective, they are helping you. But it’s important to remember that this is just a smokescreen.
Always trust your feelings and instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.
Nobody Else Will Put Up With You
This is used to make you feel insecure and dependent on them.
This phrase is designed to lower your self-esteem, making you believe that it’s impossible to love or tolerate them.
It’s a cruel tactic, designed to make you feel lucky to be with them, despite their negative treatment of you.
It’s a way to make you feel trapped and afraid to leave because who else would accept you? Don’t believe this lie.
You Won’t Understand
Used to dismiss your opinions or ideas, making you feel inadequate.
Often, the narcissist will dismiss your ideas or feelings, making you feel intellectually inadequate and incomplete. This tactic diminishes your perspective, ensuring that they remain the dominant voice.
It’s a way to maintain control, undermine your self-esteem, and keep you on the defensive.
It’s a clear red flag of emotional manipulation. They don’t just invalidate your thoughts. They also create a power imbalance.
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They’re trying to paint a picture where they’re the enlightened one and you’re unable to understand their “complicated” state of mind.
I’mTheBestThingThatHasEverHappenedToYou
They use statements like this to inflate their importance in your life.
When narcissists claim this, they’re trying to inflate their importance in your life. This isn’t a declaration of love or a compliment. It’s a power play.
They’re telling you that you’re lucky to have them, implying that you don’t deserve them. Such a statement is designed to make you feel grateful for their presence and, therefore, more willing to tolerate their behavior.
You may even begin to question your own worth. Remember, no one should determine your happiness or self-worth. You’re not dependent on them for your happiness or success.
You’re Just Jealous of Me
This phrase is often used to dismiss your legitimate concerns or objections and turn them into character flaws.
“You’re just jealous of me” is a common phrase that narcissists use to distract you from your legitimate concerns or objections and turn them into character flaws. When you raise a problem, they instinctively protect their ego and, instead of addressing the issue, they shift the blame onto you.
They’re skilled at manipulating the narrative, so you question your motives. You may wonder if you’re feeling envious instead of acknowledging the selfish behavior that sparked the conflict. Don’t fall into this trap. It’s a classic diversionary tactic to keep you distracted from their mistakes.
They turn your objections into a character flaw, effectively silencing you.
You’re Overreacting
They use this phrase to dismiss your feelings or reaction to their toxic behavior.
Likewise, if you hear the phrase, “You’re overreacting,” it’s another classic step in a narcissist’s playbook for dismissing your feelings or downplaying their harmful behavior.
This phrase is a convenient way for them to downplay your emotions and reactions, making you question your own feelings and perspective.
Their goal is to make you feel overly sensitive or irrational, which undermines your confidence in your judgment.
It’sYourFaultI’mUpset
Narcissists blame their feelings or actions on others to avoid taking responsibility.
If you’ve ever been told, “It’s your fault I’m upset,” you’re dealing with a common narcissistic tactic to shift blame and avoid responsibility.
Narcissists excel at the art of blame shifting. They’ll make you feel guilty for their negative feelings, and they’ll paint themselves as victims.
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In their world, they’re never wrong; it’s always someone else’s fault. They use this strategy to manipulate your emotions, making you doubt yourself, question your judgment, and feel responsible for their emotional well-being.
It’s a powerful and destructive tool in their arsenal, designed to keep you off balance.
I’m Sorry You Feel That Way
This is a classic apology. Rather than acknowledging their role in your feelings or expressing genuine regret for their actions, the narcissist uses this phrase to subtly suggest that your feelings are the problem, not their behavior.
Here, the narcissist avoids accepting their role in causing your distress, and instead subtly suggests that your feelings are the real issue, not their actions.
This classic no-apology apology deflects blame while belittling you. They’re not apologizing for their actions or behavior; they’re apologizing for your reaction to it. This tactic invalidates your feelings and experiences, making you question your perception of reality.
It’s convenient for them to evade accountability and shift the focus onto you. So be wary when you hear this phrase. It’s a clear sign of narcissistic manipulation and a red flag that shouldn’t be ignored.
FinalWords
That’s it. These are the things narcissists often say to their partners, and if your partner uses this repeatedly, you should be wondering if you’re dealing with a narcissist.