Are you just another friend, or are you the girl he loves?
I get it if this is one of those questions that keeps you up at night. In a way, it’s one of nature’s great mysteries.
Men can fall madly in love with a girl, and yet not stay with her because they simply don’t see a future with her.
Stories like this are heartbreaking, to be sure.
And for someone who has put everything into their relationship only to have others leave them, it’s also a huge waste of time.
That’s why, if you’ve been dating someone for a while, it might be a good idea to check out the intentions of the guy you’re in love with.
Find out if he sees you as his soulmate by looking out for these 11 subtle behaviors.
1) He gives you keys to his apartment
It’s not that you spend a lot of time there — you have your apartment — but he gave you your own set of keys anyway.
Take it as a sign: He sees you as his soulmate.
It’s more than just a token of trust; he’s saying, “It’s not just my apartment anymore, it’s our apartment.”
This is because he doesn’t see you as someone he can go on dates with for fun, but rather someone he can build a home and a life with.
2) He lets you carry his wallet
When you’re out and about and have to pay for something, he hands you his wallet and lets you carry cash or use a credit card.
To him, this makes sense because you’re already his life partner!
Sharing your money is inevitable anyway.
Perhaps most importantly, he also talks to you about finances!
Money can be an awkward topic, even for married couples… but there’s no denying that it’s something that couples need to be open with each other about.
So the fact that he lets you access his money simply means that he envisions a future with you in it.
3) You’re his secret keeper
And only you!
He’s not usually an open book, but he’s with you because you’re special.
Knowing the most intimate things about him shows that he’s fully allowed you into his life, and there’s a good chance that he thinks you’re the one.
Sharing a life with someone means sharing all the good and the bad — so he may be sharing his deepest, darkest secrets with you right now.
4) He jokes about your marriage
When you start complaining, he’ll pinch your nose, kiss you, and say, “I think you’d make a terrible wife… but I’m marrying you anyway!”
You might think, “Well, that’s just a joke.”
But ask yourself: would you feel comfortable making these jokes with him if, deep down, you don’t think he’s the right person?
I wouldn’t. That would be rude.
He’s probably just gauging your reaction.
If you say, “Pfft. I never want to get married,” he’ll at least have an idea of where he stands with you.
But if you respond with something like, “I’d like to annoy you until death do us part,” he may take that as a sign that he’s the right person for you, too.
5) Most of his plans start with “we”
Making plans together is a big part of becoming a couple.
So, of course, it makes sense that many of his plans include you, too, and vice versa.
But if he sees you as his life partner, you’re almost certainly part of his plans, as if they don’t need any discussion or explanation at all.
“We’re going to see a movie this weekend.”
“We’re saving up to go to Barcelona.”
“We’re going to talk about buying a house.”
When he says “we,” he means you and him.
As for the other people in his life, they don’t even need to ask. They know he means you because you’re the one he’s making plans with.
6) He’s constantly asking about your friends and family
“So, did your mom call?”
“How did your brother’s date go?”
“I heard there was a hurricane in your hometown. Are your parents prepared for it?”
You’re not just another date anymore, you’re not even a friend… you’re now a life partner (as far as he’s concerned, anyway) and he invests in her connections and relationships as well.
His interest and love for you is greater than yours!
This has led him to genuinely care about the people and things you love.
Why?
Because he sees you as his life partner, he can’t help but love what you love too.
7) He befriends people closest to you
He knows you’ll be happy to be with him and your friends, or with him and your family… so he goes out of his way to establish a relationship with them.
He’s putting in the effort to form a true friendship with your loved ones.
What’s his motivation?
Well, it has to be you.
You’re the right person, so he knows he’ll meet a lot of your family and friends in his life. So, he better get along with them. Or better yet, let them grow into his loved ones too.
8) He consults you before making big decisions
He doesn’t make big decisions without telling you first.
He’ll ask for your opinion, and listen to what you have to say.
For you, this is one of those things that just happened in your relationship. You didn’t ask for it, but to him, you have the “right” to know and interfere in his decisions, especially when it comes to big decisions.
After all, he no longer considers himself a lonely bachelor.
He found you – his life partner – and it makes sense that you decide important things together.
9) He feels hurt when you don’t take him into account in your decision-making
If a man truly sees you as his life partner, he will want the opportunity to step in and act like a real partner.
This means that he wants some reciprocity in your relationship – so that you can also do for him the things he does for you.
If he shares everything with you and consults with you before making big decisions, he likely expects you to do the same.
After all, commitment involves trusting someone else with the big things in one’s life.
10) He shares the burden
Are you sick? He rushes to your side to take care of you… even if he has deadlines to meet!
Are you broke? He offers to lend you money, without you asking.
He sees you as his life partner – which means he accepts that he should be there for you in good times and bad.
And the great thing about him is that he never makes you feel like a burden!
For him, that’s how life partners should be.
A person who doesn’t see you as his life partner is likely to slowly fade out of your life at those moments when they’re no longer relevant.
This makes sense because they don’t see you in their life for the long term anyway. So why should they take on your problems?
But if a man is committed and shares your burdens, it’s probably because he intends to stay with you for a very long time.
11) He motivates you to become the best version of yourself
This is a no-brainer: you want your partner to be happy.
Yes, because you love him, but also because sharing your life with someone means sharing in his happiness and misery.
If he’s unhappy, that will make you unhappy too, and vice versa.
So, if a guy encourages you to pursue your passion, try new sports or hobbies, or take the risk of changing careers (if you’re unhappy with your current job), chances are he sees you as his life partner.
A guy who’s simply attracted to you will still care about you, but not as deeply as a guy who sees you.
So…does he sometimes nag you to work on your goals?
Does he nag you to eat healthier?
Is he able to tell you the hard truths when you need them, so you can work on yourself?
It sounds like a lot, but a guy who sees you as an ideal person has your dreams, goals, and well-being in mind.
He knows that the best version of yourself is one where you’re happy and able to define success on your terms, and he’ll try to help you get there.
Final Thoughts
If you notice that your partner exhibits a lot of the behaviors on this list, that’s a good thing for you!
You have already found your true life partner.
Tell them how lucky you are to have them. And more than that, show them that you consider them your life partner too.
