Do you sometimes feel like you’re just going through the motions, settling for less than you should?
You’re not alone.
Sometimes, without even noticing, we overlook little things—a bad habit here, a concession there—and they start to undermine our standards.
Let’s change things up!
This article will highlight eight ways you might be lowering your standards without even knowing it.
It’s time to wake up, spot these sneaky habits, and ditch them.
Are you ready to stick to what matters and keep your standards high?
Let’s get started right away!
1) Excusing Bad Behavior
We’ve all done it at some point—making excuses for someone’s bad behavior, brushing it off as a “one-off” or “the way it is.”
Deep down, you know something’s wrong but you find yourself justifying it anyway.
Maybe they’re being disrespectful, inconsiderate, or simply not treating you with the respect and appreciation you deserve.
But instead of acknowledging it and taking action, you’re making excuses. You tell yourself it’s not that big of a deal, that everyone has flaws.
What you may not realize is that this is a clear sign that you’re lowering your standards.
By accepting less than you deserve, and allowing someone to treat you badly without consequence, you’re telling yourself—and them—that it’s okay.
It’s not.
You deserve better. And you need to start expecting better—from others and, most importantly, from yourself.
2) Settling for less in relationships
I remember when I first started dating my ex.
He was charming, funny, and seemed to tick all the boxes. But over time, I started noticing things that didn’t quite make sense.
He would cancel plans at the last minute, make promises he wouldn’t keep, and seemed to put everything else before me. I wasn’t a priority, I was an option.
But instead of confronting him about it or even thinking about ending things, I started making excuses for him. I told myself that he was just busy, that he had too much on his plate.
Looking back, I realize that I was settling for less than I deserved in that relationship. I was lowering my standards without realizing it at the time.
The worst part is that I was doing it willingly—convincing myself that it was okay when it was completely different.
It’s a hard truth to believe, but it’s an important truth to acknowledge.
When you find yourself settling for less than you deserve in a relationship—whether romantic or otherwise—it’s a clear sign that you’re lowering your standards.
3) Ignore Your Feelings
There was a time when I found myself in a job that looked great on paper. It was in my field, paid well, and had a good reputation.
But something wasn’t right.
I remember feeling uncomfortable every morning when I went to work. I wasn’t excited about what I was doing, and I didn’t feel appreciated or valued.
But instead of listening to that inner voice, that gut feeling that was telling me something wasn’t right, I ignored it. I told myself that I was being ungrateful or overly sensitive.
I now realize that ignoring my inner feelings was another way to lower my standards.
I was settling for less than I deserved because I was afraid to step out of my comfort zone or upset others.
Jobs’ quote is especially true here. It’s important to listen to your inner voice and not let other people’s opinions or societal pressures drown it out.
Your inner feelings are there for a reason – don’t ignore them.
4) Accept mediocrity in your habits
Did you know that it takes about 66 days to form a new habit?
That’s over two months of consistent effort to make a change in your behavior.
Now, let’s apply this to our lives.
What kind of habits have we formed over time?
Do they push us toward excellence or do we settle for mediocrity?
For example, you might have a habit of always being late.
You ignore it, saying, “That’s just who I am.”
But is that true?
Or have you simply lowered your standards and accepted that as your norm?
The same goes for habits like procrastination, negative self-talk, or settling for less in any aspect of life.
By accepting these mediocre habits and not striving to improve them, we lower our standards without even realizing it.
The good news is that since it takes about 66 days to form a new habit, we also have the power to change our habits.
We can raise our standards by consciously choosing better habits and sticking with them until they become second nature.
5) Losing sight of your values
We all have a set of values that we hold dear.
These are the principles that guide our decisions, our actions, and ultimately our lives.
But sometimes, under the pressures of life or in the quest to fit in, we can lose sight of these values.
I remember a time when I found myself drifting away from my values. I was so focused on pleasing others and fitting into a mold that I began to neglect what was truly important to me.
I found myself agreeing to things that didn’t align with my core beliefs simply because it was easier than standing up for what I believed in.
This was a clear sign that I was lowering my standards.
6) Neglecting Self-Care
In the hustle and bustle of life, self-care tends to take a backseat. We get so caught up in our to-do lists, our responsibilities, and our commitments that we forget to take care of ourselves.
We skip meals, we give up on sleep, and we ignore our mental health. We convince ourselves that we’re too busy to take a break and that we’re too important to rest.
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But when we neglect self-care, we subtly lower our standards. We tell ourselves that we’re not important enough to care for and that our well-being doesn’t deserve priority.
That’s not true.
Your health—physical, mental, and emotional—is paramount. You can’t pour from an empty cup. You need to take care of yourself first before you can take care of anything else.
So if you find yourself neglecting self-care, it’s time to reevaluate your standards and make yourself a priority again.
7) Letting Fear Drive Your Decisions
Fear is a powerful emotion. It can keep us safe, but it can also keep us from reaching our full potential.
There was a time when I allowed my fear of failure to dictate my decisions.
I was avoiding opportunities that came with the risk of failure or rejection and instead chose the safer, easier path.
But in doing so, I was lowering my standards. I was limiting myself and settling for less because I was afraid of what would happen if I stepped outside my comfort zone.
What I’ve learned is that fear is a part of life.
But it shouldn’t drive our decisions. It’s okay to feel fear, but it’s not okay to let that fear stop you from going after what you want.
If you find yourself hesitating because of fear, it’s time to reevaluate your standards and start taking calculated risks.
8) Compromise on Your Dreams
We all have dreams—big, bold visions of what we want our lives to look like. But sometimes, in the face of obstacles or setbacks, we may find ourselves backing away from those dreams.
I remember once having a grand vision to start my own business.
But in the face of challenges and doubt, I found myself downsizing that dream, thinking that maybe I wasn’t cut out for it after all.
But in doing so, I was subtly lowering my standards. I was telling myself that I wasn’t capable of achieving my original dream and that I should settle for less.
However, our dreams are a reflection of our standards. And if we downsize our dreams, we downsize our standards, too.
If you see yourself in these signs, you’ve probably been subtly lowering your standards without even realizing it.
But here’s the important part—realizing this is the first step toward change.
Awareness is a powerful tool. Once you identify the areas where you’re lowering your standards, you can begin to make conscious changes.
Ask yourself—are these compromises and concessions truly serving me?
Do they align with my values, goals, and dreams?
Your standards are a reflection of how much you value and respect yourself. They’re the boundaries that define what you’re willing to accept in life.
Don’t be afraid to aim high. It’s not about being unattainable or unrealistic—it’s about knowing your worth and not settling for less.
