If you recognize these 12 behaviors, you’re dealing with a high-level manipulator

Manipulators are dangerous and insidious. They live for the game, and the game is to do whatever the hell they want as long as they can get off without Scott.

They’ll have it their way and make you dance to the tunes of their music. Sure, everyone thinks they can recognize when they are being manipulated, but is this true?

In this article, you will either test your knowledge or you will learn exactly what behaviors high-level manipulators exhibit.

So, let’s get started!

1) the threat of negative consequences to get what they want

Skilled manipulators love emotional blackmail. They use threats to force you to comply.

But it’s not just your run-of-the-mill threats. Oh, no. They take advantage of fear or guilt to create personal threats that are chilling to the bone.

How? By manipulating your actions and making you think that serious consequences will follow if you resist.

Of course, they don’t do it out of the blue. By the time they offer these bonuses, you know them well, you know what they are capable of.

2) selectively exchange information

Manipulators strategically reveal positive details while hiding anything that challenges their story.

They make sure that they have complete control over the information so that they can shape your perception and stay away from misconduct.

This usually means that they will stab you in the back as a colleague and will not share (all) the information with you, and you will end up looking like a fool or an incompetent worker.

When you think about it, everything is very easy to do, isn’t it? You just don’t share with someone a vital piece of the puzzle.

And if you get caught, you just say that you forgot, or you act stupidly.

3) acting extra nice to manipulate you into liking them

High-level manipulators also use excessive charm, showering you with compliments and friendliness. It’s a tool to make you comfortable and more likely to comply with their wishes.

They get under your skin, and then, when you are more comfortable with them, they will make you do their bidding.

They are smart enough to know that when you perceive someone as nice and friendly, you are more likely to let down your guard and share information or compromise on their requests.

You are also less likely to question their motives or see through their manipulation.

4) pretend that you are the one who is suffering to make you feel sorry for them

Such bad people often portray themselves as victims to arouse sympathy and help from others.

They take advantage of our natural tendency to help others, even when it bothers us, by crying wolf.

By presenting themselves as helpless or in need, they want to make you feel sorry for them and, therefore, are more likely to help or support them.

They want to arouse your sympathy, which will make it easier for them to influence your decisions or actions.

5) it makes you feel guilty, even when you haven’t done anything wrong

Another thing manipulators like to do is make you feel guilty about things you may or may not have done.

Yes, manipulators skillfully use guilt as a powerful tool for manipulating emotions. Just like your mom did to you when you were a kid, you don’t want to eat your dinner or something.

But why on earth would they use guilt trips on anyone? Because they know that they work like magic.

Here are a couple of examples:

• “I think I’m going to stay home alone tonight because you’re too busy with your friends. It’s Okay, I’ll manage.”
• “I always sacrifice for everyone else, but I think my needs don’t matter. It’s Okay, I’ll figure it out on my own.”
• “If you love me, you will do this for me. It’s disappointing, but I understand if you don’t care enough.”

Ouch, right? Just reading this makes me want to do what they want me to. Alternatively, run as fast as you can from them.

So, yeah, being aware of this tactic is crucial to avoid letting their manipulation affect you.

6) send mixed signals to keep your balance

Imagine your partner, colleague, or someone who instantly responds to your messages one day and completely ignores them the next.

Or they say one thing today and another tomorrow. This is so confusing, right?

This is what high-level manipulators like to do. They like to create confusion about their level of interest or involvement. They like to send mixed signals or contradict themselves.

All this is emotionally draining, and they keep power and control over the relationship, as well as make you dependent on them.

You begin to doubt yourself, and if you put up with it, you will strengthen their control.

7) exploit your weaknesses to gain an advantage

High-level manipulators can easily identify and exploit your weaknesses, and use them against you when the time is right.

It’s your playbook to gain trust and then manipulate using your weaknesses.

So, for example, they take advantage of your fears related to relationships, work, or other aspects of your life to force you to comply.

In addition, imagine if they were aware of past traumas or difficult experiences. They will subtract these painful memories to gain emotional control and make you more vulnerable to their influence.

It’s a bad game they play, and you, me, or someone else is not equipped to deal with it at all.

We simply do not expect someone to be so despicable. This is reserved for bad guys somewhere out there, not for people close to us. Or so we think.

8) messing with your head to make you doubt your thoughts and feelings

Gas lighting. Have you heard of him? I’m sure you have. I’ve been throwing a lot lately. But what does that mean?

It simply means that someone makes you question your reality. Politicians often use this tactic, denying campaign promises as soon as they come to power.

Manipulators at all levels use it widely. They deny the things they said or did, which makes you doubt your memory and perception of events. For example, ” I never said that. You have to imagine things.”

And if you confront them about their actions, they turn the tables and blame you, making you doubt whether you are to blame for the problem. “This happens because of your behavior.”

9) overly praise you for winning in your favor

Let’s imagine something again. Imagine how someone keeps telling you how smart, beautiful, or handsome you are. How are you the best at, I don’t know, pickleball, although you hardly pass by.

Things like that. They Horn your horn all the time.

High-level manipulators expertly go about complimenting your abilities, appearance, or personality, creating a sense of obligation for you to reciprocate in some way.

RELATED:8 signs your partner’s passive-aggressive behavior is taking a toll on you

They use flattery as a tool to build connection and loyalty. Excessive compliments are aimed at hitting your ego, making you more likely to comply with their wishes.

10) blaming you for their mistakes

Instead of taking responsibility, manipulators like to blame you. In this way, they distract attention from their mistakes as you smoked and now you must defend yourself.

With them, it’s always someone else’s fault, even when they are more obviously the person they messed up.

So even when you catch them red-handed, they will say that they are not in control of the situation, show their guilt to you and others, say that they are a victim of circumstances, etc.

Many times, they will have an excuse lined up and ready to go because they never intended to do the thing they were supposed to in the first place.

So, watch out for those who always point their fingers but never look in the mirror.

11) trying to cut you off from friends and family to control you

Perhaps the most vile and harmful thing that a high-level manipulator often does is isolate you from others.

Look, in a new relationship, we want to spend as much time as possible with our new partner, right?

So we kind of neglect our friends and even our family members. The difference is that a regular partner will not tempt you to do this.

They will not talk about them, so you burn all your bridges and rely only on them for Company, love, friendship, support, etc.

Being isolated from loved ones makes you more dependent on the manipulator. Real relationships are essential for support, so be wary of anyone who tries to restrict your communication.

12) ignoring you to make you feel anxious and insecure

Purposeful or intermittent silence is a strategy to control and make you more compliant by triggering anxiety inside you. It leaves you in the dark, wondering what you did wrong and eager to fix it.

They will give you the silent treatment, deliberately ignoring your messages, calls, or presence to make you feel isolated and uncertain about their feelings.

In the end, ignoring is a control tactic. It positions the manipulator as the one in control of the relationship dynamics, leaving you to navigate their unpredictable and emotionally charged responses.

Final thoughts
To protect yourself, stay alert, trust your instincts, set boundaries, and seek support from friends or family. Educate yourself on manipulation tactics and take the necessary time to make decisions.