The ideal thing when dealing with a narcissist is a no-contact policy.
However, if you have children with him, not contacting him will be impossible. It may seem like you will be stuck with a narcissist for the rest of your life.
But this doesn’t have to be the case.
There is one thing you can use to deal with co-parenting as your boss with a narcissist.
Since you can’t use complete no contact when you have children with a narcissist, the Gray Rock Method will help greatly in keeping your contact with him to a minimum.
When co-parenting with a narcissist, the gray stone method will be helpful. The gray rock method is all about being unopinionated, uninteresting, and boring.
You don’t want to be the center of attention and attract your narcissist with drama.
You have to make it seem like your life is boring like nothing is going on, like there’s nothing to see.
The only topic you should talk about is children.
You should talk about the grades the children get in school, their achievements, school performance, etc. You don’t owe your narcissist anything more.
You see, the narcissist doesn’t care about you and he doesn’t care about the kids. He is using children so that he can be involved in all the drama that is happening in your lives. Drama is what he loves.
When co-parenting with a narcissist, keep in mind that using the gray rock method will be a bit difficult.
He will express his opinions about children, and it will be difficult not to get into a fight because no matter what you say, he will have the opposite opinion.
It will be very difficult, but don’t get caught up in self-defense!
The truth is that narcissists don’t have any real opinions about anything. They want to say the opposite of what you say just to be different.
Remember to always stay calm and never show him your feelings!
No matter what he says or does, just act like you’re not bothered, and act like you’re completely indifferent!
It’s completely normal for you to get angry and want to argue with him, but there’s no point in doing so.
If he sees that he’s making you angry with his opinions, he’ll probably enjoy it. And he will, once again, be the one who wins.
You will also look like a crazy person in front of your children.
Your children should not see you arguing in front of a narcissist because they can easily turn it to their advantage.
You cannot let your narcissist turn your children against you. The first thing you should do is talk to them honestly.
You need to be honest and tell your children that you and your narcissist don’t get along but that you are trying to do whatever it takes to make them happy.
The second important thing is that your personal life should not be brought up when talking to the narcissist about children.
You should never share information about your personal life with him. Sharing is the limit. If you share anything, he will use it against you.
He doesn’t need to know what’s going on in your private life. If you share that you are happy about something, it will make you feel bad.
If you share that you are sad, it will make you feel even more miserable. They love doing it. They are master manipulators at that.
Once your narcissist realizes that he or she cannot cross your boundaries, he or she will become upset and angry.
But every time you set and enforce boundaries, they become stronger. You gain more self-confidence and more self-esteem.
And one more important thing: you will be a healthy role model for your children.
They will learn how to enforce healthy boundaries early in life.
And the most important part of it is that you will become like a gray rock – plain and boring. That’s when your narcissist leaves you alone.
He will start looking for a new victim, someone who will feed him with the energy you decided to deprive him of.
It takes a lot of hard work to master the art of gray swing. But once you get the hang of it, it will be worth your time.
Your narcissist will have to honor the legal agreement of shared custody—and you will be seeing him a lot. But with the method you’ve mastered, he stands no chance.
