When we first start dating someone, they’re usually on their best behavior.

They show you the positive aspects of themselves, rather than the hidden, intrinsic qualities that would get you right out the door.

But over time, once you start falling in love with someone, you may notice that these bad habits are more than just quirks. So is he an idiot or just a misunderstanding?

Related: 13 Acts Of Emotional Abuse Commonly Misinterpreted As Love

  1. You start to wonder if he’s an idiot

He may refer to women in a derogatory way.

Or maybe he didn’t contact you after your first date, even though he showed all the signs that he really liked you.

Related: 5 Ways To Stay Cool And Win At Divorce (Even If You Hate Your Ex)

  1. You wonder if he’s just doing this to himself

He may leave you wondering if he cares about you or if he just wants to have sex with you.

It can be hard to tell, especially when the only time he calls is at 1:30 a.m. after a night out at the club.

  1. You see him mistreating others

When you go out, he treats the service staff like his personal slaves.

The dinner conversation usually revolves around how bad his ex was behaving for no reason at all.

Related: 4 Essential Lessons About Loving Yourself After Leaving An Abusive Relationship

  1. Tell your friends how huge it is

One of the biggest signs that you love a jerk is the way you talk to your friends about them.

He may have convinced you that you’re an idiot, or he’s treating you like trash because you (like all assholes) need to be treated that way. Creating doubt and making you think you are the problem is what fools do.

Bottom line: If you think he’s an idiot, you already know what to do.

The fact that you are reading this shows that you do not want to believe it and that you are looking for some kind of external validation for your decision. Do yourself a favor and get rid of that big jerk.