Narcissistic abuse is one of the worst types of psychological abuse a person can do to another person, but unfortunately, many people are stuck in this type of relationship.
Whether it is a child and an emotionally abusive parent, or an adult with a narcissistic partner, the effect is the same – narcissistic abuse can leave more than just emotional damage.
According to recent studies, neuroscientists have discovered that long-term narcissistic abuse can lead to actual physical brain damage.
(Below we also talk about 7 ways to deal with narcissistic abuse.)
#Long-term narcissistic abuse: Effects on the brain
It is known these days that sustained emotional trauma over a long period can cause victims to develop PTSD and PTSD.
For this reason, anyone in a destructive relationship with a partner who cares little about their family’s emotional well-being should leave immediately, especially when children are involved.
However, some people do not take this warning seriously, due to its emotional basis. What many fail to realize is that emotional and psychological distress is only one side of the coin that victims of long-term narcissistic abuse experience.
There is also a physical aspect to brain damage: when victims suffer sustained emotional abuse, they experience shrinkage of the hippocampus and swelling of the amygdala. Each of these conditions leads to devastating effects.
The hippocampus is crucial in learning and developing memories, while the amygdala is where negative emotions such as shame, guilt, fear, and envy come to life.
#Understanding the hippocampus
The hippocampus is the Greek word for “seahorse,” and is a part of the brain hidden within each temporal lobe, clearly shaped like two seahorses.
One of the most important functions that the hippocampus is responsible for is short-term memory, which is the first step toward learning. Information is first stored in short-term memory before being transferred into permanent memory.
Without short-term memory, there can be no learning.
The damage to the hippocampus is more worrying than scientists initially thought. In a study from Stanford University and the University of New Orleans, they found that there is a close relationship between high levels of cortisol (the stress-induced hormone) and decreased hippocampal volume.
The more stressed people are, the smaller their hippocampus becomes.
#Understanding the amygdala
The amygdala is known as the reptilian brain, because it controls our primary emotions and functions, including lust, fear, and hate, as well as our heart rate and breathing.
When stimulated, the amygdala is where the fight or flight response takes place. Narcissists keep their victims in a state where the amygdala is on constant alert.
Ultimately, these victims fall into a constant state of anxiety or fear, as their amygdala reacts to the slightest signs of abuse.
Long after the victim has escaped the destructive relationship, he or she will continue to live with symptoms of PTSD, increased phobias, and panic attacks, due to an enlarged amygdala that has become accustomed to living in a state of fear. To protect themselves from their reality, these victims often use defense mechanisms that distort reality and make it easier to deal with, such as:
Projection: Victims convince themselves that the narcissistic abuser has positive traits and intentions such as compassion and understanding, when in reality this may not be the case.
Compartmentalization: Victims focus on the positive parts of the relationship, separating them from the abusive parts and thus ignoring them.
Denial: Victims end up believing that their situation is not as bad as they feel, as it is easier to live with it than to confront it.
Damaged hippocampus: paralyzing everything we know
The hippocampus is perhaps the most important part of the brain when it comes to cognition and function. Everything we do, understand, read, and learn depends solely on the hippocampus working properly.
This is because the hippocampus is involved in the formation of new memories and is also associated with learning and emotions
However, the hippocampus is damaged when the body secretes cortisol, a hormone secreted during times of stress. Cortisol effectively attacks neurons in the hippocampus, causing them to shrink.
The amygdala is then stimulated by cortisol, which shifts our thoughts and neural activity from mental acuity to anxiety and stress.
When these painful feelings are pushed to the extreme, our brain activity is pushed “beyond its effective zones.”
But remember: long periods of moderate stress can be just as harmful if not worse than short-term severe stress. Even if the narcissistic abuser doesn’t take it “too far,” he’s certainly still wreaking havoc on the victim’s brain.
[Buddhism not only provides a spiritual outlet for many people, but it can also improve the quality of our interpersonal relationships. Check out my new no-nonsense guide to using Buddhism for a better life here].
# Rebuild your hippocampus and calm your amygdala
But there is always a way back to a normally functioning brain. Through certain methods such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy, or EMDR, victims who show signs of PTSD can regrow 6% of their hippocampus in just a few sessions.
EMDR can also calm your amygdala at the same time, allowing your brain to react more rationally to situations.
Some other proven methods include aromatherapy and essential oils, guided meditation, altruistic acts, and Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), which is useful for normalizing biochemical short-circuiting, which is commonly observed in chronic anxiety.
But the first step is ultimately the most important: getting out of the destructive and abusive relationship. Before any progress can be made toward recovery, the victim must acknowledge the situation and accept its reality.
So, if you’re looking for ways to deal with narcissistic abuse, check out the seven tips below:
[Buddhism not only provides a spiritual outlet for many people, but it can also improve the quality of our interpersonal relationships. Check out my new no-nonsense guide to using Buddhism for a better life here].
