What are the signs of a narcissist, a toxic relationship, or red flags of toxic love?
A narcissist, in its basic definition, is a highly selfish or self-centered person.
Being in a relationship with someone like this may seem like a terrible idea, but many people unwittingly fall in love with a narcissist for a variety of reasons.
Related: A Narcissist Is Really Just A 13-Year-Old In An Adult Body
Whether love is blind, emotionally vulnerable, or something more complex, it is certainly possible to fall in love with this type of person, even if you are self-conscious or in a positive frame of mind.
Here are four ways you could be accidentally getting yourself into a toxic relationship, so hopefully you can spot the signs before diving too deep.
If you have these four traits, you are probably accidentally attracting narcissists into your life:
- You believe in the best in people and are willing to forgive and forget
If you are the type of person who sees and believes the best in people, you are very likely to fall in love with a narcissist.
Narcissists can be very persuasive, and if they convince you to feel or think a certain way, you may trust them simply because you are a good person.
When you see the best in others, you are easily convinced – and perhaps even yourself – that things are not as bad as they seem.
(Even if others try to show you otherwise).
Related: 7 Traits Of The Golden Child (And How They’re Influenced By Narcissistic Parents)
- You are consumed with passion about the reality of the relationship
The phrase “blind by love” rings true if you fall in love with a narcissist.
Whether you’re overwhelmed by the intensity of attachment (narcissists are very dramatic people!), caught up in emotions, or driven by lust, you may continue to stay in a toxic relationship because you foolishly believe this person loves and values you.
- You are convinced that this person will change
Narcissists are extremely manipulative.
No matter how many times they mess up, they have an uncanny ability to convince you that they will change their behavior and never hurt you again.
Related: 3 Dead Giveaways Of How Narcissists Act In Romantic Relationships
- You are being manipulated and the warning signs are disguised as something else
Narcissists are able to hide warning signs and red flags through their conniving behavior.
For example, instead of taking responsibility for your infidelity, they may manipulate the entire event and say you were “too clingy” or not giving them space.
Often times people can indulge in this toxicity because they do not recognize the real warning signs and manipulation tactics.
They have normalized these behaviors, or become immune to their partner’s behavior altogether.