Have you ever had a moment of pure joy, only to have it crushed by a narcissist in your life? It’s like their joy raining down on your happiness parade.
You may find yourself scratching your head wondering why someone would want to ruin such a moment. Here are 9 reasons why narcissists want to ruin your happiness and even take away your joy.
1 Power and Control
Spoiling other people’s joy gives them power, giving them control over other people’s emotions and experiences.
A narcissist’s need to ruin your happiness isn’t about you; it’s a twisted form of self-empowerment that gives them control over your emotions and experiences.
They are masters of manipulation, using their cunning and charm to dictate the mood of any situation. They can steal the spotlight and assert dominance by casting a shadow over your joy.
You may find them belittling your accomplishments or belittling your joy. They don’t do it because they’re unhappy for you.
It’s their twisted way of maintaining control. They feed on your disappointment, using it to prove their power.
2 Attention Seeking
They crave constant attention, and their trampling on other people’s happiness often turns the focus on them.
Just as they use power and control to overpower your happiness, the constant need for attention drives their behavior, causing them to trample on other people’s happiness to ensure the spotlight stays on them.
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Narcissists are attention addicts. They can’t stand having someone else in the spotlight. They will do anything, including ruining your happiness, to shift the focus back onto them.
They have an insatiable need to be seen, heard, and worshipped. They are like emotional vampires, sucking the joy out of your moments to feed their own ego.
They can’t stand the idea of you enjoying happiness, not because they hate you but because they need your attention.
They are playing a twisted game, and understanding this can help protect your happiness.
3 Lack of Empathy
Their inability to empathize with other people’s happiness often manifests itself in the form of a desire to ruin it.
Because of their lack of empathy, narcissists often find it difficult to share in your happiness, which leads them to ruin it instead.
They can’t put themselves in your shoes to feel the joy you’re experiencing. This lack of empathy leads to a profound inability to understand or appreciate your feelings.
Whether it’s your promotion, your wedding, or just a good day, they can’t mirror your happiness.
Instead, they may minimize your accomplishments, make negative comments, or divert attention away from you. Why? They can’t understand what you’re feeling.
4 Envy
They often can’t stand to see others enjoying success or happiness that they don’t have, which leads them to try to ruin it
While their lack of empathy can dampen your joy, their intense envy also fuels their need to ruin your happiness.
If you’re successful or feeling joyful, a narcissist can’t stand it. They simply don’t want to be in the spotlight; they can’t stand seeing you in it. They feel that any happiness you experience should be theirs.
5 Insecurity
They may feel threatened by other people’s happiness, and so they try to downplay it in an attempt to boost their own sense of self-worth.
Narcissists harbor deep-seated insecurities that can make them feel threatened by your happiness, leading them to downplay it in an attempt to boost their own fragile self-worth.
When you’re happy, it’s as if the spotlight is shining on their own shortcomings. They can’t stand that.
Instead of dealing with their insecurities, they’ll try to steal your happiness. They may downplay your accomplishments, minimize your feelings, or create drama to distract you from your own happiness. It’s a way for them to feel better about themselves.
6 Superiority
They derive satisfaction from feeling superior, which may include putting others down.
They may try to put you down in their quest for superiority, and derive satisfaction from your misfortune or failures.
You may notice them undermining your accomplishments or highlighting your shortcomings. They relish any control they can exert over you, and use it to boost their own self-esteem.
They will use manipulation and guilt to keep you in a position where they can feel superior. When you’re down, they’re on top, and that’s exactly where they want to be.
This constant power play is exhausting, but it’s important to recognize it for what it is: a desperate attempt to feel superior at your expense.
7 Bridging the Gap
If they can sabotage someone else’s happiness, it narrows the gap between their own misery and the other person’s joy.
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If a narcissist is able to sabotage your happiness, it often narrows the gap between their own misery and yours. As you can see, the inner world of a narcissist is usually a dark place filled with dissatisfaction and resentment.
Unable to find joy within themselves, they seek to fill this gap by stealing it from others.
If they are able to distort your happiness, it makes their own sadness less noticeable. It’s about their need to feel less miserable.
8 Eliciting Reactions
They often enjoy eliciting emotional reactions from others, which they see as a form of control.
You may often notice a strange satisfaction in their eyes when they are able to elicit emotional reactions from you, and they see it as a twisted form of control. This satisfaction isn’t about real connection; it’s about power.
Narcissists thrive on the chaos they create, using your emotions as a playground.
They will push your buttons, knowing exactly what will hurt or upset you. It’s a mind game, and unfortunately, you’re the pawn. They’re not interested in your feelings except to use them as weapons.
Every reaction you give feeds their ego, reinforcing their sense of superiority. It’s a vicious cycle, but understanding their tactics can help you break free. They’re not looking for a solution; they’re looking for feedback.
9 Distract from Their Own Problems
By ruining someone else’s joy, they can divert attention from their own insecurities or failures.
Why do narcissists ruin someone else’s joy?
It’s a diversionary tactic to avoid their own insecurities and shortcomings. They feel threatened when you’re happy because it inadvertently highlights their own unhappiness.
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They’re experts at diverting attention to themselves, even through negative means. They’re so caught up in the drama they’ve created that they can’t stand focusing on someone else’s success or happiness.
They will do everything they can to ruin your happiness because it takes away from their problems. The happier you are, the more obvious their concerns become.
FinalWords
Don’t let a narcissist steal your happiness. Recognize their behaviors as attempts to control, seek attention, envy, or divert from their problems.
Understand that their lack of empathy and desire to feel superior often drives them to ruin your happiness.
Don’t feed their need for feedback. Your celebrations are about you and your loved ones, not them. Stand strong, don’t let them fill your happiness gap, and always reclaim your happiness.