In a classic similar move, a narcissist will leave things in your home to test your sincerity and use it as an excuse to come back again. They know they’re annoying you; they know that their presence in your home means you can’t do what you want, but none of that bothers them.
They exert their presence in the most obvious ways and will keep you on your toes, wondering when you’ll hear them knocking on your door. It’s impossible to keep the peace when you’re constantly anticipating chaos, right?
4 They Lurk
The root of all narcissism is entitlement, so if you live with a narcissist and have friends, they’ll automatically feel as entitled to be around as you are. Their space is yours, their friends are theirs to impress, and their time and presence completely monopolize the moment.
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The narcissist can rock the boat, which can be embarrassing for all of you.
This is because they control certain conversations, comments, or even actions.
They don’t care about your need or desire to spend time with your friends, because they lack boundaries or the idea that they know how sacred those things are.
5 They Keep You Away From Your Friends
Isolation is a fun game that narcissists play. If you try to do something about the awkwardness of having friends over – they’ll make it harder for you to visit.
The reasons are?
“I’m not feeling well. Will you stay and help me?”
“I have a ride coming up, and I need you to stay with me.”
“I was thinking about (insert horrible thing that happened 10 years ago here). Can you stay and talk to me about it?”
What if you said no? There would be hell to pay, and at the very least, the guilt trip would make you feel obligated to cancel your plans with friends to be with them.
If we’re talking about the really dark ways that narcissists waste your time – they’ll go right ahead and hide your car keys, so you can’t get out even if you want to. Arguments are also important here, making you feel so exhausted that you don’t want to go out.
6 They don’t let you breathe with your friends
Despite their attempts to impress you and others, narcissists don’t do much. They like to pretend they’re busy and needed, but these are empty ways to fill time because they can’t afford to do anything.
When they see you with your friends, they want admiration, love, support, and all the things that inflate their ego.
If you’re with friends, they’ll constantly try to annoy you. This makes you feel exhausted, and over time, you’ll eventually learn to choose not to see them because history repeats itself.
This is another tactic to drain your time and make it all about them.
7 “The Surprise!”
Narcissists will feel like you’re drifting away from them, and they won’t like it. As a result, they can sometimes use surprises as a ploy to lure you back in and give them the time they feel they deserve.
Their effort in doing this will make it difficult for you to refuse their offer, and if you do, expect fireworks because this is where the narcissist’s true colors will come out.
Related : Unmasking the Secret Life of a Narcissist!
“After everything I’ve done for you!”
“You’re so ungrateful!”
“Why do you always have to ruin every nice thing I try to do?”
Where does that leave you; a nice party? In the pits of guilt, wanting to say or do anything to make it better, and giving in to their offer to spend more time with you amidst their latest surprise.
8 “Can I come too?”
Narcissists don’t care about your feelings, so if they invite themselves to where you’re going, they don’t want to miss out on something that might benefit them. They can be so overwhelming that saying “no” makes you feel uncomfortable.
Related : This is Why Narcissists Are Experts in Faking Empathy!
There’s likely to be an “Oh, I’ll come!” — a direct insistence that they have to go with you. If they ask you to, you might as well say no, and no is the worst word a narcissist can hear.
As you know, a narcissist won’t hesitate to remind you of your guilt if you say no, and they’ll also enjoy pressuring you to say yes and give them what they want.
9 “Me, Me, Me”
If there was a book called Conversations with a Narcissist — it would be the shortest, most misleading book you’ll ever buy.
Why, I hear you ask?
Because conversations with narcissists don’t exist!
Narcissists talk to you. They don’t want to hear what you have to say unless it’s full of compliments and gushing reviews about their character or intelligence.
Getting hold of one requires listening to their words and enjoying the time that passes while they say what they want.
They soak up your time like a sponge, making it all about them.
