You’ve longed for and waited for this moment. Now it’s here, your freedom awaits.
You’re breaking up with a narcissist.
What’s next? Well, they’ll say a lot (or not), but I believe it’s important to prepare for every scenario.
That is, prepare yourself for how you’ll respond—if you want to at all.
Let’s take a look at 8 things narcissists say when you break up with them.
Get Ready!
As appealing as breaking up with a narcissist may seem, nothing comes without its pitfalls.
This is especially true when saying goodbye to someone who’s been so toxic in your life.
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You may have waited a long time to mutter the word “treason,” but as you say goodbye, say hello to some of the classic phrases they’ll say first.
1 “Don’t call me again”
This is the phrase the narcissist wants to scare you.
They want you to feel like you’ve crossed a line. You’ve made this decision, and it’s final.
They say it makes you feel like you’ve overdone your ideas. You’re being so brave. You’re saying something that will end it.
And after all this time, the narcissist has been sowing doubt and confusion in your mind, they’ll hope you’ll change your mind and ask them back, or ask for another chance.
This puts them in charge, and they warn you, “This is it.”
Very dramatic.
You’re absolutely right, this is it.
I won’t see you again, alligator.
2 “I never loved you, anyway”
The ultimate and most direct form of punishment is to tell you right away that your breakup with them is no big deal.
Sure, this will hurt their pride, ego, and self-esteem. It will remind them of how much they hate themselves deep down, but to hide the shock and pain, they’ll pretend not to care.
Don’t exaggerate the pain of loving someone they can’t have right now. It’s not.
This is about demonizing them and causing a small problem with their own thoughts.
Of course, let’s be completely honest here. This is about hurting you. Because they’ve been doing that ever since they met you.
At least now, they can be more open about it because they have this excuse.
You broke up with them, and now they can say or do whatever they want.
3 “I’ll hurt myself if you leave.”
It hurts to hear a threat like that directed at you when you’re trying to do the right thing.
You want it to end, you’ve had enough, and you’re being emotionally blackmailed by the narcissist to stay.
That’s the situation, and it’s a threat so severe that it makes the victim feel like they can’t take the risk.
So they agree to stay and try again.
Related : Why Narcissists Treat Others Better Than You: The Shocking Truth Revealed!
I know it’s important, but this is the information you need to share with a mutual friend.
Sharing is caring, and remember that what others may or may not do is not your fault or responsibility.
4 “I wish you the best of luck finding someone else to love you.”
It’s actually quite easy, if you give it the time.
Everyone deserves a chance at happiness, including you. And love will find you. Don’t believe a word a narcissist says when they tell you they won’t find her.
They don’t know anything; they’re just pretending.
You may have entered this relationship feeling secure and hopeful, but over time, everything has changed.
I urge you to consider how dating a narcissist and losing trust go together.
This is precisely why you won’t have any problems meeting someone new in the future.
5 “I Won’t Miss You”
It’s okay. They only say that because they’re already thinking what you’re thinking.
You’re the one who won’t miss them.
The narcissist wants to hurt you when they say this, as if they always want to hurt you.
If you leave them, they’ll dig through their pockets for insults that will stick in their mind, designed to make you feel bad about yourself one last time before you leave.
Related : What Happens When a Narcissist Is Exposed to Their Own Family?
This, too, is threatening, because if that attachment exists, you won’t like hearing that you won’t miss them.
You should let him go anyway.
6 “You’ve already met someone else.”
Well, that’s a good thing, isn’t it? It means the narcissist is off your back, and you’re free to move on.
Okay, that may not be true, but that doesn’t mean you can’t accept him at face value.
Even when you’re in the midst of breaking up with a narcissist, they’ll still want a reaction from you. They want to see the pain on your face because they’ve replaced you with someone new.
If it’s true, that’s great. If it’s not, doesn’t that show who they really are anyway?
I feel sorry for the new boyfriend, don’t you?
They’ll be going through everything you’ve been through during this time.
And if they’re lying (and they probably are), they’re being incredibly stupid for not handling the breakup like an adult.
7 “They’re just trying to break us up!”
A narcissist will do anything to assume that your best friend, or your mother, is trying to convince you to break up.
Don’t you think it’s funny that they’re trying to look at themselves anywhere but in the mirror?
Narcissist, this breakup was your fault, and yours alone.
If it weren’t for your bad behavior, we wouldn’t be in trouble here.
Related : What Happens When A Narcissist’s Partner Becomes Emotionally Detached?
They think they can control you, and that everyone else can, too.
Don’t interpret this as your decision.
8 Nothing: The Ghost
Oh my, the silence! There’s nothing worse than trying to explain nothing, right?
Who said you have to do that?
Take the narcissist’s silence and accept it for what it is.
That’s what they’re used to, remember?
They keep quiet when they want you to become paranoid, and they always succeed.
Convincing you to fall into the trap of believing you’ve done something wrong makes you chase after what’s right.
But guess what? It’s not always true!
You won’t win!
So prolonged silence will have the same effect, only more powerful.
They want you to be chased and regret your decision to break up, but this is where you really have to pull yourself together.
As shocking as it may be for a relationship to suddenly collapse, that’s what breaking up means.
If you’re doing this for yourself, you should consider silence as a signal to move on.
