Let it be known that a narcissist’s lip-smacking means they are lying.
They get ahead by tricking people into hearing whatever they want to hear…
Or…
They allow guilt to take over by making you feel bad about something you didn’t do.
Raise your hand if you know what I’m talking about here, because this is serious business now.
Narcissist lies are devastating and destructive… Here are 8 lies they typically use to get to you in the most horrific ways.
NarcissistLies
Let’s call it a day, shall we?
Narcissists live in their lies.
They can’t stay away from them for long, just like a fish out of water.
Swimming in their sea of lies is something they rely on for complete control, and doing so does nothing to their moral compass (sorry? A moral compass?!…)
Related : How to avoid picking fights with narcissists
Lying is second nature to a narcissist. They know they’re doing it, but they don’t care. They’ll tell people whatever they feel as long as they look good.
Caught in the Fog of Deception
You or I (or the innocent party) are being swept up in the narcissist’s lies. I mean, the last thing we want is to be that way, but narcissists do a great job of exploiting the people around them, and that usually involves using them as players without their consent.
You see, we get caught up in the fog of deception, but we don’t even realize we’re playing the game until it’s too late.
To us, it’s not a game.
No Conscience
When a narcissist lies, they do it for two reasons:
To make themselves look better
To make someone/everyone else look bad
But ignorance isn’t bliss, is it? A narcissist has no conscience and carries on as if nothing happened. Meanwhile, those on the receiving end of these lies end up worse off.
It’s an unfair position to be in. Whether you’re the victim of a lie, or you’re being told a lie to appease yourself.
Either way – they’re still hurting you.
8 Things Narcissists Lie About
So – what are the most common lies that narcissists like to tell?
“I’m better than them”
No, I’m not.
You think you are, but you’re not.
Of course, a narcissist can say whatever they want to an uninformed stranger or a new friend. There’s no real reason for these people to argue with them.
Related : 9 Reasons Why You Feel Unsafe in the Car With Narcissists Driving
They can also complain over dinner about their new boss or colleague and immediately compare themselves to them.
I’m so much better than them.
I can do their job with my eyes closed.
They think they’re the best, but they’re not. Nothing close.
What they do is try to repeat themselves as smart, skilled people. Anyone they talk about has threatened them and damaged their ego in some way.
It leaves them wanting, or rather needing, to re-validate themselves.
Their ego is wounded.
And they lie.
“I had nothing to do with this…”
One of the things narcissists love to do is create chaos. Whether it’s by making a mistake at work so someone else can take the blame, or causing a rift between family members or friends.
They stir up a storm, throw you into it, and then watch you spin helplessly.
Then they throw up their hands and protest, “I had nothing to do with this!”
It’s a lie, they did it.
What you have to realize is that narcissists never want to look bad. They can’t. If they do, people will turn away. They will see the narcissist coming, cross the street to stay and get away.
Instead, the narcissist lures people in, gains their trust, and then moves on and uses them for his own gain.
If the narcissist ever tells you it has nothing to do with him, you better never believe him.
“I promise”
Ah, the sweet, sweet, empty promise of the narcissist.
Of course, the promise is as sweet as lemons.
You can still make lemonade out of it, especially if you step up and understand that the narcissist’s promises never come with legitimacy.
I promise I’ll paint the picture this weekend.
I promise we’ll get married someday.
I promise we’ll go and do something romantic this weekend.
I didn’t do that, I promise.
Related : How to prevent dating yet another narcissist?
These are just words—nothing more. The narcissist doesn’t bother with the meaning behind them, they just want to appease you in that moment. They want your trust, so they can continue to lie.
Nothing more, nothing less.
“You Can Trust Me”
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard a narcissist try to reassure someone that they can be trusted, I’d be a very rich man.
What they’re doing here is very cunning.
Of course, yes, we can trust anyone. But that doesn’t mean they’ll stick to their word, does it?
Trusting others completely means giving them a promise that no matter what they do, they will always have your back.
Who wants to have a narcissist’s back?
Does anyone want to…?
“I’m sorry”
Oh no, they didn’t.
Not again.
They said they were sorry, and you believed them.
Any apology from a narcissist has a heartbreaking tone, doesn’t it? For a moment, it almost sounds like remorse. They’ve taken responsibility for what they did wrong, and they want you to see that they’re sorry.
And we do. We believe them because an apology has weight for us. It means something. It proves that there is life beneath all these layers of deception, but in reality—“I’m sorry” is a lie in and of itself.
“It’s your fault/It’s not my fault”
Why wouldn’t they do that? If they can convince you that something was your fault, they’re taking all the blame off themselves.
Yes – that means even if they were at fault in the first place.
Related : Why is it so hard to say no to narcissists?
Imagine you’re holding a really hot baking sheet. A narcissist will pass it to you and blame you for burning their hands. So you’re left with the hot baking sheet, and getting even more burned, while they leave you saying, “Hey, it’s not my fault you’re holding that.”
They don’t care, and that’s the problem with many people who are controlled by an abusive narcissist. If you’re hurting, they don’t care. If they lie, they don’t care. They live without regrets.
“I’ll change”
No. No, you won’t change. You tell people you’ll change so they’ll believe you and trust you again, but in the end you won’t change.
Believing that a narcissist will change is how they manipulate you into thinking that they feel bad about their actions. They want to treat you like a human being so that your good soul can see someone who truly wants to be better next time.
Do they ever change?
Simply put – narcissists deny that they are narcissists – so expecting them to change is always a waste of time.
“You’re so disappointing!”
You’re not actually a disappointment. You may be incredibly successful, but they don’t want you to feel or realize it. If narcissists label you a disappointment, it’s likely because you’ve done something right, good, fair, or worthy.
Their primary goal is to make you feel bad about it. Labeling you a disappointment ticks all of these boxes and more.
What do they want?
They want you to feel as bad about yourself as they secretly feel about themselves.
It’s all a lie.
