Have you ever heard of that time a narcissist told you something that surprised you in a pleasant way?
What do you mean by no?!
To be fair, you’re right. Narcissists have a strict list of things they never tell anyone. Luckily for you, I have this list.
You can use it as a checklist against potential narcissists. If they check every point – you’ll know who you’re dealing with.
Related : Things That Make Narcissists Lose Their Mind
So, pens ready? Here are 8 things a narcissist will never tell you.
1 When They’re Wrong
Check!
Narcissists have an internal oath. It states:
One should never admit to being wrong because they are never wrong.
Such impossibilities for a narcissist are actually quite possible. Everyone is wrong sometimes, but narcissists aren’t everyone. They’re a special kind of reed, above us ordinary peasants.
A narcissist might tell you that the circle is square, and they won’t accept anyone who challenges them.
If you’re unlucky enough to question their “truth,” their patience will come at you like something from outer space.
Understand that your role is to always be wrong, and you’ll succeed.
Note: Don’t get that. You’re not always wrong.
2 What They Really Feel
I feel really insecure about myself.
I wish I was more attractive.
I wish I was you.
I want the life you live.
I treat you unfairly.
Just use your imagination in these comments for a moment. Really understand what could happen if a narcissist allowed their vulnerabilities or true feelings to show.
If they could stop using anger and resentment as their primary emotions, wouldn’t everything be so much better?
Breaking news – they won’t. Narcissists hide their true feelings for fear of appearing weak. They don’t want you to know that they despise themselves. They just want you to do what they say so that everyone’s life will be better.
Instead, narcissists enjoy hearing and seeing how you feel, so they can use those things against you.
3 How Sorry They Are
Narcissists don’t feel sorry for anything, so why would they apologize?
They don’t care enough to stay sorry. Needless to say, if they did, they would do one of two things.
Their apology would be an admission that they did something wrong. Apologizing means they caused hurt and pain.
Related : 10 Things Narcissists Will Blame You For
Apologizing for something means they have completely lost control over you. They can’t and won’t. By clinging to you even when they’ve hurt you, they are holding onto control for another day.
4 They Are Narcissists…
I know what you mean when you tell me I have these traits.
I get what you’re saying, and you’re right.
I need to take a good, long, hard look at myself.
I cause a lot of trouble wherever I go.
I laugh as I write this because this is so far from anything you would hear from a narcissist.
Admitting that they are a narcissist.
The term narcissism itself carries so many destructive attributes. It not only harms others, but it can literally change lives. People cut off contact with family and friends. Entire identities collapse after being in a narcissistic relationship. Sometimes, it can take years of therapy to overcome this.
No narcissist will admit that they caused these things by stating their truth.
5 Their Secrets
You don’t have to be a narcissist to have secrets, but secrets don’t have to be bad. They can be embarrassing, funny, or romantic. They can also be negative, like hurting someone, cheating on your spouse in the past, etc.
We’re usually happy to confide in our secrets to people we trust. We can even open up to therapists in a confidential setting. Telling these people things we’ve never told anyone before can help us discover who we really are. It can also help us heal the past or explore why we have internal patterns.
Narcissists will keep their mouths shut. If someone is going to therapy, they will intentionally withhold important things from them. The idea is that the therapist doesn’t delve into their secrets.
Therapists don’t look at their clients with perfect or imperfect eyes. People are human, and humans go through experiences.
Related : 10 Things that Trigger Narcissists
Wherever narcissists are, their secrets are usually under lock and key.
No one can know the truth.
6 The Truth
By the way…
The truth is denied in the narcissist’s mind. Were they late? They were stuck in traffic, and they didn’t watch season 3 of that TV show.
Are they not listening to you? They have a headache. They weren’t “disinterested.”
You see where I’m going with this. Narcissists hide the truth because the truth doesn’t always put them in a positive light. Sometimes it’s creepy and makes them look really bad, but they won’t accept that.
Instead, they’ll sugarcoat it with lies and fabrications to please you and maintain their perfect image.
7 “It was my fault”
Wait, did they just say those four horrible words?
Of course they didn’t, my ears must have been playing!
For a moment, I thought I heard the narcissist say, “It was my fault.”
Nope.
The reason I didn’t hear it is because that’s a statement no narcissist, you, or anyone else would ever say to me.
Admitting that they made a mistake would do great damage to the image they work so hard to maintain.
If someone knows that a narcissist has done something wrong, from that moment on, it will be about them.
Do you remember that time he did that horrible thing? He did it because he told me it was his fault.
Do you know when he cheated on you? I know, because he told me it was his fault that your relationship ended.
No – it never happens.
Narcissists are perfect. They will not let you tell the world anything that was their fault.
And they won’t say it either.
Wait a minute…
Before you think you’ve figured out the narcissist’s tricks…there’s something you need to know…
8 Be Prepared to Hear All of the Above!
What? Hear what you’re asking.
Make it Make Sense!
Okay.
Sometimes you can just take the first seven points and throw them in the trash.
Hear me out!
Narcissists are the most deceitful people alive. They will do anything to keep you hooked. They don’t want to lose you because you provide a special kind of supply that they enjoy stealing from you.
Related : What to Say to a Narcissist to Shut Them Down
So… though…
Narcissists will apologize. They will say it was their fault. They will tell you how they feel. They will tell you the truth. They will raise their hand and say when they are wrong. They will tell you their secrets. They will even tell you that they are a narcissist.
Why?!
Because they know that by showing a little of their vulnerable side, you will feel sorry for them, you will cut them some slack. You will give them another chance. You will forgive over and over again.
The number 8 is a scam. Narcissists are not soft-hearted, so don’t fall for their sell.
