Shortly after I met my first husband, he announced that I was the woman he had been waiting for his whole life. Once we were married, he declared his love for me every day — while exploiting my talents, running my credit cards, and managing relationships with several other women.

I divorced my ex-husband, who was later diagnosed as a sociopath, in 2000. A little more than a year later, after consciously focusing on my emotional recovery, I met a new man. We dated for four years, got to know each other, and then got married.

We are now celebrating our 18th anniversary. I can honestly say that I am as happy and in love today as I was on our wedding day.

Related: If A Guy Does These 7 Things, He’s An Emotional Psychopath

Here are the differences between true love and social love:

What’s the difference between true love with a normal, caring person, and “love” with a sociopath? Almost everything. This is what I learned.

1. True love is peaceful.

I don’t have the stress, drama, and doubt that I felt when I was married to a sociopath. Instead, I feel calm and content with my new husband.

2. True love is supportive.

My sociopathic ex was demanding and indifferent to how his demands affected me. Now when I need help, compassion, or just someone to talk to, my husband is there.

3. True love is teamwork.

I’m not the only one who works. You are not the only one who bears the burdens of life. My husband and I are in it together.

Related: 3 Powerful Ways To Deal With People Who Dominate Conversations

4. True love is balanced.

Yes, we face ups and downs. When one of us backs down, the other is there to provide a boost. It’s a real give-and-take process.

5. True love is exciting.

Sex with the sociopath was exciting at first and then became routine. With my new husband, beyond the physical pleasure, I feel a deep, emotional connection, and a much stronger experience.

6. True love is companionship.

My ex traveled a lot (I later learned I saw other women). Honestly, I was glad he was gone. When my new husband travels or even goes to work, I look forward to his return.

7. True love is happiness.

When I was with my ex, I was miserable. Now, even as my husband and I deal with daily problems, I feel lighter and cheerful.

8. True love is easy.

I no longer struggle in my marriage. I know I can trust and depend on my husband, and he knows he can count on me. We share, laugh, and travel the path of life together, hand in hand.

Related:11 Honest Signs Your Parents Might Not Love You The Right Way
Experience true love after enduring social love

Yes, there is love after the sociopath. how did you find it?

First, it is essential to commit to emotional recovery. A relationship with a sociopath, narcissist, psychopath, or other exploiter is brutal. Confusion and betrayal create deep emotional wounds that must be healed.

This is not easy or fun. I spent a lot of time curled up in a ball, crying, or hitting pillows to get rid of my anger. But this is necessary. When I got rid of my emotional pain, I felt more focused and willing to try again.

Will you encounter another sociopath? Maybe because millions of them live among us. But your intuition will warn you if there is a dangerous person.