For your personal growth and well-being, it is a good idea to re-evaluate the people you surround yourself with from time to time.
Who is holding you back? Who is constantly jealous of your success? But one thing that gives me hope is knowing that for every toxic person I shut out, I’m making room for a more positive, caring person to fill it.
So, without further ado, here are 7 types of people you need to leave behind (for your own good):
1) People who constantly criticize you
We all have that friend or family member who always finds things to criticize….
Either your hair is too short or too long. You have gained weight or you are not eating enough. And why, in God’s name, did you think that jacket was a good idea?
Look familiar?
People like this tend to be very insecure. They criticize you to make themselves feel better about their lives.
But hanging out with someone like that long enough will end up making you insecure too.
This process can be difficult. I know this, because I’ve been through it many times.
Surround yourself with people who provide constructive feedback instead. People who truly care about your happiness and well-being. You will quickly notice improvements in your mood and mental health!
2) People who are never happy for you
At a family gathering one day, my sister-in-law announced her engagement to her boyfriend, who is also the father of their 8-month-old child.
I already knew about it, so I didn’t respond immediately, instead letting the family take priority.
However… things didn’t go as planned. There was complete silence. You can hear someone’s stomach growling and the baby sucking on his dummy.
In short, they never received a “Congratulations” or a “So happy for you guys!”
Even though it’s family, I would advise my sister-in-law to keep her distance, because they were clearly not happy with her!
This applies to you too.
People who pull their faces or look for negativity when you have good news don’t deserve a place in your life. Unfortunately, it’s a sign of the following point:
3) People who are jealous of you
Usually, if someone is never happy for you, it’s because they’re jealous or resentful.
For your own good, you should limit time with these people or cut them off completely.
Jealous people see no further than their unhappiness. Often times, they will do everything in their power to sabotage your success or happiness.
You may feel guilty when good things happen to you, just because of their reaction.
Unfortunately, I experienced this within my family – growing up I was always hurt by their snide remarks or belittlement of my accomplishments.
But since I moved away and disconnected, I actually feel safe and content. proud of myself. And not worrying about what others will say or think.
You can achieve the same thing.
4) People who gossip behind your back
Do you want to know the quickest way to lose trust in everyone around you?
Hang out with the gossip.
People like this won’t think twice about spreading lies, embellishing stories, or creating drama just for the sake of making noise.
But the worst part is that it may end up making you feel like the center of a crazy conspiracy theory where everyone is out to get you.
This is because talkative people rarely admit their mistakes. They will blame everyone first.
Where does that leave you? The center of chaos, you’re not sure who you can trust or believe anymore.
So, I think it’s pretty clear the damage that can come from keeping someone like this in your life – run for the hills as quickly as you can!
5) People who drain your energy
I made the mistake twice of making friends with an energy vampire. I’ve learned my lesson now but at the cost of my patience, energy and sometimes my sanity.
Energy vampires will cling to you, feeding off any positivity you have and turning it into something negative.
They like to complain about their lives. They complain about everyday problems as if it were the end of the world. They expect you to listen to them for hours and hours.
- If there’s one that comes to mind, think about this:
- Do you feel exhausted after hanging out with them?
- Do you rarely get a chance to talk or share your news?
- Are they always the victim in every situation?
If the answer is “yes” to everything, then you are suffering from a drain of energy in your life. Cut it off immediately.
This may sound harsh, but having someone like that around is very harmful to your mental health. Not to mention they don’t really care about you anyway, it’s all about them.
6) People who manipulate
Have you ever had a friend who never takes no for an answer?
They will guilt trip you, try to get sympathy, negotiate, or even emotionally blackmail you.
Let’s say you’re exhausted after a busy week and all you want to do is relax at home. But your friend insists on going out with her.
Completely ignoring the fact that you’re tired, you might say something like: “If you really loved me you’d come with me” or “A good friend wouldn’t let me get bored on a Friday night!”
In fact, a good friend respects her friend’s emotional and physical needs!
You have to leave such people behind because they don’t care about you. They don’t have your best interests at heart.
Make no mistake, manipulation and guilt-tripping tactics are toxic.
7) People who resist change
Finally, you need to leave behind people who resist change. Because these same people will hold you back when it comes to developing yourself.
They will discourage you from taking risks. They will tell you to stop moving forward in life.
And 99% of that comes from their fear or insecurity. Or because they feel threatened by the changes you’re making – you’re no longer the safe, ‘comfortable’ friend they once had.
But that’s a good thing!
We have to develop and change, not stay stuck in one place.
That’s why whenever someone from the past says to me: “You’ve changed a lot,” I take it as a compliment and think: “Thank God!”
But I know it can be difficult to exclude people, especially if they are family or old friends.
In the end, you have to know who supports you and who holds you back. Even if you can’t do without them, setting aside time with them will make a huge difference!
