We live in a world full of constant competition, and it is common for us to become stuck in the need to constantly compare ourselves to others and strive to be the best.
While many people can recognize their abilities and not let the accomplishments of others define them, some struggle with constant competition within themselves. What happens if you feel the constant need to assert your superiority? Or if the battle rages between your true identity and how you look compared to others?
If you feel the need to belittle or criticize others to feel more confident in yourself, this may be a sign of a superiority complex.
What is a superiority complex?
A superiority complex is a psychological defense mechanism. This term was created by Alfred Adler to describe an exaggerated sense of self-importance and self-worth over others, masking true feelings of vulnerability.
People with a superiority complex believe they are better than others in terms of abilities or intelligence and despise individuals they consider inferior.
Developing this in a small way at some point in life is somewhat inevitable. We all do it from time to time to deal with certain situations. But some people may suffer chronically and have no idea about it.
Related: Secret To A Good Marriage Is Knowing When To Say ‘F*ck It, I’m Done’
What causes a superiority complex?
Ironically, a superiority complex arises from deep-rooted feelings of insecurity. According to experts, superiority complex and inferiority complex are just two different manifestations of the same self-esteem issues.
Another manifestation of self-esteem issues is an inferiority complex, which is an exaggerated feeling of weakness. It often hides real motives, such as aspirations for power.
Some people feel confused because many people with a superiority complex deal with a feeling of inferiority within themselves.
What do you call someone with a superiority complex?
Some of the terms used to describe people who have feelings of superiority are “exaggeration” and “narcissism,” or they can be considered someone with a god complex.
Although there is more to these terms, they convey a similar concept, which is “an attitude of superiority that masks actual feelings of inferiority and failure.”
Is superiority complex a bad thing?
While we all use this coping mechanism from time to time, and confidence and high self-esteem are a healthy part of life, a constant superiority complex can be a bad thing.
Having a superiority complex can also lead to a lack of empathy toward others, an inflated ego, and even feelings of loneliness. But that doesn’t make you a bad person.
“A superiority complex in and of itself isn’t a bad thing,” life coach Anne Papaiotti explains. “But when a way of thinking, emotion, and behavior becomes about control, power, and entitlement, it sure can be.” “Endless exaggeration and compensation create irritation, conflict, and distance in relationships, which further isolates the person suffering from the complex.”
Superiority complexes create a variety of behavioral problems and can make it very difficult for people who suffer from them to fully relate to others. Without the right help, you may end up feeling isolated.
Related: How Take Back The Power From Your ‘Relationship Saboteurs’ NOW
Common signs of a superiority complex
If you notice these patterns in yourself or someone you know, they may have a superiority complex
- They are never wrong.
They make sure to prove others wrong, not themselves. But why do they feel this way? Simply put, they are not truly happy with who they are as a person, and instead of dealing with these feelings, they instead choose to essentially “shine the spotlight” on the ideal version of themselves.
People with this complex cannot give up the image they try to create for others. However, owning their negative personality traits means coming to terms with their flaws.
Unfortunately, when someone suffers from a superiority complex, admitting mistakes will only destroy this false version of themselves that they rely on.
- They have a complete sense of entitlement.
People with a superiority complex believe that everyone is less than them and believe that they deserve everything they want. They struggle to realize that everyone deserves equal levels of respect and believe they can treat people however they want to achieve their goals.
Some link this to how these people were raised as children. Oftentimes, their upbringing compensates for the lack of care and affection by spoiling them with material gifts. This means that they lack morals and standards or do not understand the value of earning.
- They are very controlling
People with a superiority complex often seek leadership at work or in groups so that they have a justification to assert their dominance. In positions of power, they behave in ways that make others fear them rather than respect them, according to mental health expert Adina Mahli.
Losing their leadership status can wreak great devastation on these individuals. If they lose control, they feel they have lost their superiority. Their self-importance depends on their ability to control.
Related: 7 Critical Ways To Avoid Relationships With Unsafe, Toxic People
- They constantly compare themselves to others
Because their sense of self-worth is dependent on others, a person suffering from a superiority complex cannot resist the urge to compare themselves to those around them. They feel defeated by the achievements of others because to them this means that they are not enough or deficient in some way.
On the surface, they will belittle the accomplishments of others to distract from their lack of self-worth which makes them feel good. They don’t see that there is enough success, that being happy for others is as good for you as it is for them.
- Their mood fluctuates quickly and frequently.
Those with a superiority complex experience a constant battle between internal inferiority and the need to appear dominant externally. So, it’s no wonder that these emotions collide to cause dramatic jumps in their moods.
They often do not realize the self-esteem problem within themselves. They also do not understand their feelings, and therefore cannot control them. This can have unfortunate effects on mental health as they struggle to connect with their true identity.
- It’s always about them.
When someone suffers from a superiority complex, it is easy to view them as selfish. They think in terms of “I” and “me,” and rarely think about how their actions affect others.
They often devalue the achievements of others by praising themselves. They may tend to interrupt and brag about themselves. This stems from their anxiety about not being liked or highly appreciated.
- They lack empathy
People with a superiority complex usually struggle with empathy for others. They are immersed in their insecurities and are too busy formulating their self-perception to try to understand others.
Their lack of empathy makes them seem cold and sensitive, or as if they are too concerned with their interests.
What to do to overcome the superiority complex
Despite all the negatives, having a superiority complex does not make you a terrible person. It is simply part of complex emotional pain and feelings of inadequacy.
Unfortunately, there is no standard treatment for the superiority complex because it is not considered an official diagnosis.
But for some, therapy can help overcome these feelings and regain a sense of self-love. “Through mentoring, they can address underlying issues, remove the mask, and learn healthy ways to deal with hidden feelings of inadequacy and mediocrity,” says Papaioti.
Related: How To Immediately Tell If A Guy Is Emotionally Unavailable
