Have you ever heard the old saying “The eyes are the window to the soul”? This is especially true when it comes to attraction.
Here’s the thing.
Attraction is a funny thing. It can be so obvious or so subtle that it’s almost invisible. And when it happens at work, between colleagues? That adds an extra layer of complexity.
So how do you know if your friendly coworker is just being nice or if there’s a deeper attraction at play? Enter psychology, our handy guide to decoding the human mind.
Okay, let’s get to the heart of the matter.
1) They Find Reasons to Be Around You
Here’s our first sign.
You know that feeling when someone always seems to be right next to you? Maybe they always stop by your desk or magically appear in the break room when you’re there. This isn’t just a coincidence.
Psychology tells us that people tend to gravitate toward those they’re attracted to. It’s a subconscious thing. We want to be around people we like—or in this case, are attracted to.
But remember, context is key.
If your coworker happens to sit next to you in meetings because that’s where the empty chair is, it may not mean anything. But if they’re constantly “bumping into you” at the office? That’s a different story.
So keep an eye on them. If they’re always there, it may be because they want to.
2) They Remember the Small Details
Well, here’s another one.
You’ve probably experienced this. You casually mention something about your life, maybe a hobby you enjoy or a favorite band, and then days or weeks later, they bring it up again.
This happened to me once. I casually mentioned my love of indie folk music in a meeting. A few weeks later, my coworker recommended an indie folk band she thought I might like. It was a small gesture, but it showed me that she was attentive and interested in my interests.
This, my friends, is a classic sign of attraction.
Psychology suggests that when we’re attracted to someone, we tend to remember even the smallest details about them. That’s because we subconsciously attach importance to the things they say or do.
3) Body Language Speaks the Truth
Now, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty.
Body language is a powerful form of communication. And oftentimes, it says more than words can.
Here’s what I mean.
You’re in a meeting, and you notice that your coworker is staring at you, or maybe leaning in when you talk, or constantly mirroring your actions. These are all classic signs of attraction.
Let’s be clear here.
We’re not talking about those unintentional gestures we all do. No, we’re talking about subtle but consistent signs of attraction.
Psychology suggests that when we’re attracted to someone, our bodies tend to respond reflexively. This could be through prolonged eye contact, repetitive behaviors, or even subtle touch (like a pat on the back or a brief touch on the arm).
4) They Initiate Conversations
Let’s move on to the next sign.
Have you noticed how some people, regardless of their usual personalities, seem to take the initiative to start a conversation with you? It’s not just about work-related discussions, it’s also about your weekend plans, the book you’re reading, or your thoughts on the latest Netflix series.
Attraction is funny that way.
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Psychology suggests that when we feel attracted to someone, we want to know more about them. And how do we do that? By initiating conversations, of course.
So, pay attention.
If your coworker is frequently initiating conversations with you, it could be their way of showing interest. They’re taking the time and effort to interact with you outside of work responsibilities. That’s something to note.
5) They Compliment You A Lot
Here’s something to ponder.
Compliments. Compliments aren’t just meant to boost our ego or make us feel good. They mean more than that.
Did you know that complimenting someone makes us like them more? That’s true. One study found that giving compliments can make us more attracted to the person we’re complimenting.
So, think about your interactions with your coworkers.
Do they compliment you a lot? He might compliment your work, your clothes, or even your sense of humor. If he’s showering you with compliments left and right, it could be a sign that he’s deeply attracted to you.
6) They Offer a Helping Hand
Now, let’s explore this sign.
Work can get stressful. Deadlines, presentations, last-minute changes—we’ve all been there. But here’s the thing. When you’re swamped with work and a colleague steps in to help you, it’s more than just teamwork.
We’re talking about those moments when they go above and beyond their job description to help you. Maybe they stayed late to help you finish a project or offered to take on some of the workload during a particularly busy time.
So if your colleague comes to your aid frequently, it could be a sign that they have deep feelings for you. It’s not just about offering help; it’s about showing that they care.
7) They Show Genuine Interest in Your Personal Life
This is the final sign.
When a colleague starts showing a genuine interest in your life outside of work, pay attention. It’s one thing to ask about your weekend plans for the sake of a chat, but it’s another thing to ask about your elderly grandmother’s health or how your pet’s vet appointment went.
This level of interest often stems from attraction. It’s about wanting to understand you beyond your professional persona, to find out what motivates you.
Conclusion
If you find yourself empathizing with these signs, take a moment to reflect. How do you feel about your colleague? What does this attraction mean for your professional relationship? It’s important to think about these questions before drawing conclusions or making any decisions.
Ultimately, clarity often comes from open and honest communication. If you feel comfortable and it’s appropriate, talk to your colleague about your feelings.