We all have emotions, but mastering the art of managing them is a feat not everyone can claim to have accomplished.
Do you marvel at those individuals who seem to remain calm in the face of chaos? Do you wonder how they manage every situation with a poised clarity that seems beyond your reach?
What if you could unlock the secret to their emotional intelligence and apply it to your own life?
After extensive research and drawing on the wonderful field of psychology, I’ve identified 7 key habits of people who are exceptionally skilled at managing their emotions.
If you’re keen to boost your emotional well-being and move through life with greater peace, this list might be a good place to start.
1) They Practice Mindfulness
You’ve probably heard the term “mindfulness” in self-help books and wellness blogs, but have you ever stopped to consider its true power?
Mindfulness is the foundation upon which excellent emotion management is built. It’s not about suppressing your emotions or pretending they don’t exist.
It’s about acknowledging them, understanding them, and then deciding how to respond.
People who excel at managing their emotions don’t let emotions get to them. They’re always in tune with their emotional state, observing their feelings without judgment.
This doesn’t mean they’re constantly in a state of internal contemplation, but rather that they have a heightened sense of awareness that allows them to identify and process their emotions when they arise.
This proactive approach prevents emotions from building up and overwhelming them, allowing for better control and healthier expression.
2) They Allow Themselves to Feel
It may seem counterintuitive, but those who manage their emotions effectively don’t shy away from them—they embrace them.
Yes, you read that right. Contrary to popular belief, managing emotions isn’t about avoiding or suppressing your feelings.
It’s about giving yourself the space and permission to feel, even when those feelings are uncomfortable or painful.
People who are good at managing their emotions recognize that every emotion has a purpose and carries a message.
Whether sadness signals a need for healing, or anger signals an injustice that needs to be addressed, every emotion has value.
Allowing themselves to sit with their emotions and truly feel them helps them healthily process their feelings. As a result, they can avoid emotional buildup and potential outbursts.
This practice promotes emotional resilience and fosters a deeper understanding of self. Which brings me to my next point…
3) Understanding the relationship between the brain and emotion
Have you ever thought that our brain is like an orchestra, with each section playing a vital role in creating the symphony of our emotional responses?
People who are skilled at managing their emotions recognize this interesting relationship between our emotions and the way our brain works.
More specifically, the amygdala, often referred to as the brain’s “alarm system,” plays an important role in processing emotional reactions, while our prefrontal cortex, the brain’s “conductor,” helps regulate these reactions.
Now, I’m not saying that people who can manage their emotions know this down to the details. But they do understand the gist of it—that some physical reactions, like a racing heart or sweaty palms, are just the brain’s way of responding to stressors.
Being able to recognize these responses for what they are—physiological responses designed to protect them—helps them not get carried away by their emotions.
It guides them toward healthier ways of managing their emotional responses.
4) Engage in regular self-care
Talking about healthy ways to manage emotions brings me to self-care.
It’s not about indulging in expensive spa days or taking luxurious vacations (although those can be part of it).
Self-care, at its core, is about tending to your physical, emotional, and mental needs on a consistent and intentional basis.
They prioritize activities that promote well-being, like regular exercise, a balanced diet, adequate sleep, and moments of relaxation.
But self-care extends beyond the physical realm. It also includes activities that nourish the mind and spirit.
This could be anything from practicing meditation or reading a good book to spending quality time with loved ones or pursuing a passion project.
By prioritizing self-care, these individuals ensure that they are in the best possible state to deal with their emotions effectively.
After all, it’s very difficult to manage your emotions when you’re physically or mentally exhausted. Regular self-care acts as a preventative maintenance for emotional well-being.
And if that wasn’t enough…
5) They’re Not Afraid to Ask for Help
We live in a world that often glorifies self-reliance, which can lead us to believe that asking for help is a sign of weakness.
But the truth is, reaching out to others when we’re struggling is one of the most courageous things we can do.
People who are exceptionally good at managing their emotions understand this. They recognize their limitations and aren’t shy about asking for support when they need it.
They know that outside perspectives can often provide them with clarity that they might not find on their own, which is why they may turn to a trusted friend or seek professional guidance from a therapist.
By embracing vulnerability and reaching out for help when needed, these individuals can navigate their emotions more effectively, while also creating stronger, more supportive networks around them.
6) They Don’t Seek Happiness
Sounds strange, doesn’t it? After all, isn’t the pursuit of happiness what we all strive for?
However, those who are good at managing their emotions recognize a key paradox: the relentless pursuit of happiness can sometimes lead to the opposite.
They recognize that life is a spectrum of emotions, and that sadness, anger, or anxiety are as much a part of the human experience as joy, love, or excitement.
They don’t run away from these “negative” emotions; they accept them as natural and inevitable aspects of life.
Chasing a state of happiness can lead to disappointment and stress when reality isn’t quite right.
On the other hand, accepting that every day won’t be filled with sunshine and rainbows can lead to a more balanced emotional state.
Allowing themselves to experience the full range of human emotions helps them cultivate a more realistic and healthy relationship with their emotional lives.
This acceptance serves as a powerful tool in their emotional management toolbox.
7) They Maintain a Positive Outlook
We’ve all heard the phrase “look on the bright side,” but can it have an impact on our emotional management? As it turns out, yes!
People who are successful at managing their emotions tend to cultivate a positive outlook on life. They recognize that while they can’t control every circumstance, they can control their attitude toward it.
Now, this doesn’t mean that they ignore the negatives or brush off their problems with a sunny disposition.
They simply choose to focus on solutions rather than dwelling on the problems. They acknowledge the challenges, but they also recognize the opportunities for growth and learning that come with them.
This positive mindset helps them navigate their emotional landscape with resilience and optimism, making it easier for them to recover from setbacks and maintain emotional balance.
Embracing Your True Nature in Emotional Management
In our quest to manage our emotions effectively, we must honor and embrace our emotional nature.
What does this look like in practice? It starts with recognizing that you are an emotional being. You experience a wide range of emotions, and that’s normal.
It’s okay to feel happy, sad, angry, excited—all of these emotions are part of the human experience.
Next, understand that your emotions are unique to you. Just as no two people are alike, no two emotional landscapes are the same.
Your emotions may not always match what others expect or what society deems appropriate, but that doesn’t make them any less valid. Honor your emotions for what they are—true expressions of your inner world.
Embracing your true nature also involves permitting yourself to be imperfect. Managing your emotions isn’t about achieving perfection; it’s about growth and progress.
There will be times when your emotions get the better of you when you react in ways you wish you hadn’t. This doesn’t mean you’ve failed, it simply means you’re human.
Above all, embracing your true nature means accepting yourself as you are—with all of your emotions—while striving to become the best version of yourself you can be.
In doing so, you pave the way for a more emotionally balanced and fulfilling life.