Leaving a narcissistic relationship is different from leaving a normal relationship, because narcissists are different beings.

There are many things you do after a breakup that are acceptable for people with normal personalities. However, they are not acceptable when dealing with narcissists, because they have different mindsets and motivations.

In this article, I’ll share six things you should never do after leaving a narcissist…

Check_His_Social_Media

Checking a narcissist’s social media accounts after a breakup is a bad idea, as it doesn’t lead to any good and will likely have negative consequences.

Related : This Sneaky Way Gives Narcissists Access To Your Phone

Narcissists are masters of manipulation and will expect you to check their social media accounts. They may post things that trigger you, such as their latest love projects, sarcastic messages to you, or photos with their new lover, in places they know you like.

A narcissist may post upsetting things as revenge, especially if you ended the relationship. Your responses may open up communication channels, allowing them to return to your life.

If they want you back, the narcissist may hint that they’ve changed. They’ll post details about therapy sessions, new jobs, joining the church, and so on, hoping you’ll regret your decision to leave.

Checking their social media accounts is a bad idea because it exposes you to their psychological tricks and gives them the opportunity to manipulate your emotions, hurt you, and possibly lure you back in. So, don’t be tempted to check their social media accounts after you’re free.

Agree To Be Friended

It may seem like a good idea to stay friends with an ex. But if they’re a narcissist, it’s not worth it. It only benefits them, not you. And their gain is usually your loss.

Narcissists approach their relationships transaction by transaction. They aim to take more than they give. So, if you have things that benefit them, they may want to remain “friends” to exploit you. This could include money, relationships, possessions, services, etc.

Furthermore, narcissists prefer to have options, even in romantic relationships.

Narcissists hate being single. So they often keep their exes “friends,” just in case their relationship deteriorates. Then they have alternative options.

Related : 70% of People Falling For Narcissists Have These Traits

Being in the background with a narcissist isn’t good for your soul, and that’s what you’ll likely do if you remain friends. They may sabotage your future relationships just to keep you free for them.

Tell Them What You Give

It can be tempting to reach out to your narcissistic ex and tell them what you think. Once you’re free, you’ll more clearly understand the wrongdoings they’ve done. This is emotionally stimulating.

But telling them what you think doesn’t solve anything. The narcissist doesn’t care about your hurt. In fact, they may take pride in the profound impact they’ve had on you.

Also, the narcissist won’t admit they’ve done wrong, neither to themselves nor to you (unless they’re pretending to win you back). So they won’t learn from their mistakes. So what’s the point of confronting them?

Even worse, communicating with a narcissist usually works to their advantage. It opens up communication channels and allows them to reenter your life, manipulate your thoughts, and possibly exploit and abuse you. They may also use your “attacks” as “proof” that you’re the crazy one, not them.

Communicate To End The Relationship

At the end of a normal relationship, people often end the relationship because they want to know what they did wrong and how they can improve next time.

However, a narcissist is unlikely to be honest. Rather than admitting their mistakes, they’ll likely blame you. Therefore, you’ll achieve nothing when you try to find a solution to the problem.

In fact, seeking a solution to the problem may do more harm than good. They may convince you that you were wrong—when you weren’t. These false doubts may affect your next relationship.

Narcissists are known for not offering a solution to the problem, even after long-term marriages. Because for them, the relationship never ends. Therefore, they often keep the door ajar, in case they want to get back together in the future.

The best solution you can achieve is to get to know the narcissist as much as possible, as this reveals more about your relationship than the narcissist will admit. You’ll discover why they behave in certain ways and what their true motivations are. Furthermore, you don’t need to contact them for this purpose.

Ask For Money You Returned

At the end of a narcissistic relationship, the other person likely owes you money or owns some of your possessions.

Unless it’s extremely important, it’s usually best to let go. Your peace of mind is more important than money and possessions.

Related : 14 Ways How Narcissists Are Paranoid

If a narcissist knows you want something from them, it gives them power. They may use this as a carrot to gain your favor. For example, they may threaten to destroy things unless you do as they ask. Or they may only return one item to you each time you meet, forcing you to see them constantly.

If they owe you money, the narcissist may repay you in small installments. In cash, they may be able to see you regularly. Or they may withhold payment when you don’t comply.

Withdrawing with a complete detachment gives you back your power. Because they don’t have what you want. So, there’s no need to see them or dance to their tunes.

Get_Back

Never go back to a narcissist! Once a narcissistic relationship ends, don’t look back. Because no matter how bad a narcissist is, they’re likely to be even worse the next time.

If you go back to a narcissist, they’ll see it as an acceptance of their previous bad behavior. Because, in the end, there were no consequences; they took you back.

They may treat you nicely at first. But once the initial love-bombing phase is over, they’ll likely treat you even worse than before. Because, in their mind, you’ll still get them back. So, there are no consequences for their bad behavior.

So, please don’t be fooled into thinking they’ll treat you better this time. They won’t.

Conclusion

If possible, cut off contact completely after you break up with a narcissist. This gives you time and space to heal, without the narcissist ruining things with their mind games and manipulations.

Related : Why Do Narcissists Start Fights For No Reason?

If you leave a narcissist, they’ll likely feel wronged. They may see themselves as a loser to you. And they’re not a good loser!

To combat this, many narcissists try to win their partner back, just to end the relationship this time. While this may seem childish, it’s surprisingly common.

There’s no point in staying in contact with a narcissistic ex. Narcissists view people as objects to be used, rather than shared companions.

So, if you’ve managed to break free from a narcissistic relationship, don’t look back. Walk away, stay away, and minimize contact as much as possible. Because that’s what’s best for you.