Narcissists often go to great lengths to maintain a certain image and protect themselves from exposure. Here are six secrets they typically try to keep hidden:
1. Their Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem
Despite projecting confidence and superiority, narcissists often suffer from deep-seated insecurities and low self-esteem. They construct a grandiose facade to cover up feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness. Admitting vulnerability would threaten the carefully crafted image they present to the world, so they protect this secret at all costs. Any threat to their ego can provoke defensive behavior, such as anger or denial.
2. Their Need for Validation
Narcissists crave constant validation and admiration to feel good about themselves, but they don’t want others to know how much they rely on external approval. To appear self-assured, they often hide the fact that they are desperate for praise and recognition. Their tendency to surround themselves with people who bolster their ego stems from this hidden need for external validation.
3. Their Manipulative Tactics
Narcissists often use manipulation to control others, but they rarely acknowledge these behaviors as manipulative. They may gaslight, guilt-trip, or charm people to get what they want, all while pretending that their actions are genuine. By keeping their manipulative tactics a secret, they can continue to exert control without being called out for their behavior.
Related : 8 Fake Stories Narcissists Tell You
4. Their Fear of Rejection and Abandonment
Beneath their exterior lies a deep fear of rejection and abandonment. Narcissists often go to great lengths to avoid situations where they might be rejected, including preemptively discarding people to protect themselves from being hurt. They may also act overly possessive or controlling in relationships, all while hiding the fact that their behavior stems from a fear of being abandoned.
5. Their Envy of Others
Although narcissists often present themselves as superior, they frequently feel envious of others. They may be jealous of others’ success, looks, relationships, or happiness, yet they will never admit to feeling inferior. Instead, they may criticize or try to undermine those they envy, while keeping the source of their resentment concealed.
6. The Fragility of Their Self-Worth
The self-worth of a narcissist is often fragile and depends on external factors like achievements, relationships, and status. They may put on a show of confidence, but their self-esteem can crumble if things don’t go their way. They may experience intense shame or self-doubt, but they will never openly acknowledge it. To avoid exposure, they deflect blame onto others or deny any responsibility for failures.
Conclusion
Understanding these secrets can help you see through the facade that narcissists create. Recognizing the hidden fears and vulnerabilities they work so hard to conceal can empower you to set boundaries and avoid being manipulated. The more aware you are of these behaviors, the better equipped you will be to protect yourself from their tactics.