The world of dating can be a complex labyrinth, but when narcissists find each other, their relationships often become a unique and intriguing blend of drama, passion, and power struggles. It might seem contradictory for two people with such self-centered tendencies to be drawn to one another, but there are surprising reasons why narcissists often end up in relationships with other narcissists. Let’s delve into the six reasons why narcissists enjoy dating each other.
1. Mutual Admiration Society
Narcissists have an insatiable need for admiration and validation, and who better to provide this than another narcissist? When two narcissists come together, they create an endless loop of mutual admiration. Each partner showers the other with praise, compliments, and adoration, feeding their egos in a way that feels satisfying. This constant exchange of flattery serves as a powerful bond, as both individuals feel like they’ve found someone who truly appreciates and understands their greatness.
In this dynamic, both narcissists feel like they’re basking in the glow of someone who is just as extraordinary as they believe themselves to be. It’s a cycle of self-congratulation that allows them to feel validated and superior, at least in the early stages of their relationship.
2. Shared Values and Goals
Narcissists are often driven by a desire for status, power, and external validation. When two narcissists date, they quickly realize they share similar values and goals. Whether it’s a thirst for social status, financial success, or simply being seen as the most attractive couple in the room, they find a sense of kinship in their ambitions.
This alignment can create a powerful sense of unity. They work together to achieve their goals, often becoming a power couple that others envy. They thrive on the perception that they are exceptional, and being with another narcissist who understands this drive can make them feel like they’re an unstoppable force.
3. Intense Chemistry and Passion
The relationship between two narcissists is often marked by intense chemistry and passion. Both individuals are highly charismatic, charming, and confident, which can lead to a whirlwind romance. The excitement and drama of their relationship often fuel their need for stimulation, and they enjoy the constant highs and lows that come with dating someone who is just as self-assured and unpredictable as they are.
This intensity can be addictive, as each partner feels a thrill from the power dynamics and emotional rollercoaster. The dramatic highs make them feel alive and important, while the lows provide opportunities to assert dominance and control, which feeds their narcissistic tendencies.
4. Power Struggles and Competition
While this might seem counterintuitive, narcissists often enjoy the power struggles and competition that come with dating someone just as self-centered as themselves. They thrive on conflict and are drawn to situations where they can assert their dominance and control. When two narcissists date, their relationship becomes a battleground where each tries to outdo the other, whether in terms of career success, social status, or simply winning arguments.
This constant competition keeps the relationship exciting and engaging. It gives them a sense of purpose and allows them to feel superior when they “win.” For narcissists, being in a relationship with someone who challenges them and pushes them to be their best (or most ruthless) can be highly satisfying.
5. Validation of Self-Importance
Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe they deserve the best in life. When they date another narcissist, they feel validated in their belief that they are worthy of someone equally exceptional. The fact that they’ve attracted another person who shares their grandiose sense of self reinforces their own self-perception of being special and superior.
This validation is a powerful motivator for narcissists, as it confirms their belief that they are deserving of someone extraordinary. It’s not just about finding a partner; it’s about finding someone who validates their sense of being “better” than everyone else.
6. Lack of Empathy Makes It Easier to Navigate
Empathy is often in short supply in narcissistic relationships, but when two narcissists come together, this lack of empathy can actually work to their advantage. Neither partner expects the other to be emotionally available or supportive, which means they’re less likely to feel disappointed or hurt by the other’s behavior.
This lack of emotional investment allows them to navigate the relationship without the burden of deep emotional connections. Instead, they can focus on what they enjoy most – the thrill of the chase, the power dynamics, and the sense of superiority. In this way, their relationship can be more straightforward and less emotionally taxing, which suits their self-centered nature.
Final Thoughts: A Match Made in Narcissistic Heaven?
While it may seem surprising that narcissists are attracted to each other, it actually makes sense when you consider their need for validation, excitement, and power. They feed off each other’s egos, share similar values, and enjoy the intensity and drama that comes with their dynamic. However, this type of relationship is often unsustainable in the long term. The very traits that draw them together – competition, lack of empathy, and the need for constant admiration – can eventually lead to conflicts, resentment, and a power struggle that neither is willing to lose.
In the end, the relationship between two narcissists is a fascinating dance of mutual admiration, competition, and validation. It’s a complex and often tumultuous connection, but for as long as it lasts, it provides both partners with the excitement and self-assurance they crave.
