Many people do not realize that narcissism is the result of deep-rooted insecurity.
This is hard to imagine because the narcissist often seems conceited, full of himself, and cares more about himself than others.
These are defense mechanisms acquired to cover up deep feelings of shame or shame.
A narcissist has been hurt in a major way that makes him feel weak, helpless, and insecure.
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#Here are 6 painfully honest signs that you are in a relationship with a narcissist:
1. They consider themselves the main character.
Insecure people do not have a strong sense of their worth or worth. A person who is feeling insecure will make self-deprecating comments or talk negatively about themselves.
On the other hand, the narcissist will try to cover up this lack of self-esteem by trying to appear very important. They will brag about their accomplishments or how they are the ones who solve unsolvable problems.
They will gloat about things or make sure you know about them. They want an ego boost. They don’t just praise themselves. They hope to get your praise too.
2. They do not admit their mistakes.
Insecure people respond greatly to mistakes. When an insecure person makes a mistake, they make a big deal of it.
“I’m so sorry” comes to them more easily. They say that often and seem to apologize for their presence.
On the other hand, the narcissist rarely apologizes for any of his actions. They will not take the blame for something going wrong but will find someone else to blame for the problem.
They often become angry or aggressive when others try to criticize them for mistakes to put themselves in a more powerful position.
3. They take advantage of you
The insecure person is using you to feel better about themselves. An insecure person asks you questions and seeks positive feedback.
“Do these pants look good on me?”
“I hope I didn’t cause you too much trouble when I asked you to do that for me?”
They hope that you will receive some amount of praise or encouragement so that they will feel better about themselves.
Narcissists will use you differently. They will build a case against you about how much better they are than you.
When you share a story, they will have a more impressive story. When you succeed, they will share with you one of their successes that (in their mind) is better than yours.
If you choose a restaurant to meet them at, they will suggest a better restaurant because it’s not good enough for some reason.
Related: Two Words That Can Immediately End Narcissistic Abuse
4. They escape conflict.
Insecure people are not good when it comes to conflict. Insecure people will defer to your judgment in disagreements, believing that your opinion supersedes theirs.
They will not resist because they underestimate the value of their claims and they certainly will not confront them. These people are known to be people pleasers.
Narcissists are known for creating conflict but running away from it. They constantly tell people how others are wrong and how they are right.
They rarely listen to different points of view, and will only continue to convince opponents of their views.
Even if direct evidence could be presented against their conclusions, they would not back down, and it would only fuel their attempts to prove themselves. For example, they will claim that there are “flaws in the study.”
They will also negatively attribute things to people as if they were being personally attacked – someone cuts them off while driving, then road rage ensues, the waiter gets their order wrong, and not only do they express that, but they also feel entitled to a free meal.
5. They are not self-aware
Insecure people are often the first to sign up for every self-help seminar or buy all the self-improvement books. They constantly feel inadequate, no matter how much investment they have made in themselves.
They cannot see the truth because their judgment is shrouded in a veil of inferiority.
Narcissists don’t need any self-help, this applies to people who are weak and unable to face life’s difficulties on their own (their way of saying they’re too good for it all).
They want to believe that they have elevated themselves and become successful on their merit and may believe that they are as healthy as possible, which is why narcissists rarely seek treatment.
Related: 4 Biggest Signs You’re In Love With A Clinical Narcissist
6. They lack empathy
In either case, it is difficult for insecure people to empathize with others. Insecure people are so preoccupied with their inferiority or vanity that they conclude that other people’s negative experiences are because of them.
When someone is upset, they will conclude that they did something that upset them. They take it as their responsibility.
Narcissists don’t think about others, except when it comes to what they can do for them.
#What is a narcissist?
According to Psychology Today, a narcissist has “a hunger for recognition or admiration, a sense of exclusivity, a desire to be the center of attention, and an expectation of special treatment that reflects a perceived higher status.”
