Dealing with toxic people’s behaviors is bad enough on its own, but when it comes to passive-aggressive narcissists, you’re on another level.
On the scale of narcissism, you never want to be at the top. Well, you don’t want to be on the low end either. Anyway, narcissism is in all of us, to a degree, but balance is what we all must achieve.
Now, there is a certain type of narcissist that can be particularly outrageous. The passive-aggressive narcissist can be even worse because they can come across as bland, reserved, and even seeming idealistic. Similar to the passive-aggressive personality, the narcissist operates in a covert manner.
The passive-aggressive personality traits of the narcissist
If you want to dig deeper into what the passive aggressive type of narcissist is, you have to understand “the perfect mate,” “one of the best people I have ever met,” or “she is absolutely perfect.”
Yes, if you haven’t met an Earth Angel yet, you probably haven’t come across the passive aggressive toxic personality. This type of personality would make you think that they are absolutely perfect in every way.
Listen, I’ve met people who sounded too good to be true, and I’ll tell you, about 98% of them were. I’m sorry. I hate to be negative, but it is so.
Our world, our genes, and our upbringing have created many wolves in sheep’s clothing. So, if you encounter these people, how do you feel? I bet some of you feel pretty spoiled.
Signs and behaviors of a passive-aggressive narcissist that are destructive to others
- It’s too good to be true
If you thought the average narcissist wore masks well, you’re in for a surprise. The passive-aggressive narcissistic personality type can cause everyone outside of your family to believe they are perfect.
Now, here’s where they win outrageous prizes. A narcissist with passive aggressive traits can cause family members, apart from their mate, to also believe they are perfect. Their poor fellow is the only one who knows the truth, and therefore the one who suffers the most.
A covert or introverted narcissist can also appear reserved, insecure, and sensitive at first. For example, they will be more sensitive to any criticism, including constructive criticism. They might say self-deprecating things and sound sad and vulnerable, which has a certain degree of charm in it.
guess what? This is all fake. In fact, the only thing they crave is your attention and sympathy because they feed off of others.
- Extraordinary gas lighting
I hate gassing. Oh, I hate that with a passion. A toxic person with passive aggressive traits can make the nun feel guilty and mad.
Remember when you caught your narcissistic girlfriend flirting with that other guy? Well, if you confronted her, I’m sure you’d still be apologizing even now. You might say you’re sorry about the wrong way you’ve taken things, and how things aren’t always what they seem, huh…
I’m sorry, but you are lit. They make you mad, rude and rude. This is because they are closer to madness than you. Narcissists use gaslighting for many reasons.
It could be a way to avoid responsibility for their actions and hide what they did wrong, as in the example above. They also spotlight their victims to feel powerful and in control and thus feed their sick egos.
- They don’t really care about people but pretend they do
The passive aggressive personality of the narcissist has no room to care for others. But make no mistake, most people will appear as if they care deeply about everyone. They set the character that they want to be kind, want to help people, and want to make sure everyone is treated fairly.
Now, be their wife, get into the bedroom and try to talk about how something hurt you. Oh, and just a hunch, have you ever seen your passive-aggressive narcissist scream? no?
Well, until something hurts them or threatens them, they won’t cry. And if something hurts you, well, it has to be your fault. Let me give you a little scenario that will give you chills.
Let’s say this is you, the real victim: “You know, we haven’t had any good time together lately.”
Narcissist: “Well, you are always complaining. You are never satisfied. Why would I want to spend time with you when you are constantly doing it?”
The narcissist is almost unable to take care of others. The passive-aggressive version is about the same.
Let that sink in.
- They distort, alter or manipulate facts
If you suggest something, the narcissist will say they suggested it. If it made sense to you, it would be a lie, and the narcissist would be the one to brush away any problems. When the facts are laid out on the table, the narcissist will find a way to change the facts.
Did you hear me??? The narcissist will try to change the fabric of reality by twisting and turning his words. Whatever serves their purpose will be the facts.
Whatever makes it look better will be changed to accommodate that. It will be so ridiculous that you won’t be able to believe what you hear.
But in the end, all the psychological games they play serve one purpose – feeding the ego. To make themselves feel good and powerful, they will try to convince you that black is, in fact, white.
- They don’t take responsibilities
Passive-aggressive narcissists do the strangest things along with the negative ones. They fail to take responsibility when they do something bad, and they try to take responsibility for the good things they don’t do.
They insist that they come up with all the good ideas and refuse to acknowledge the ones that don’t work. To say the least, it’s frustrating.
If you call out a passive-aggressive narcissist, he will either deflect the whole situation like in the examples above or just pretend he didn’t hear or understand you.
Yes, I know it sounds childish, but a narcissist would really rather act immature than accept the truth and take responsibility.
Oftentimes, the narcissist honestly believes they did nothing wrong. In others, they know it all too well but can’t stand the idea of being exposed. In the end, all they care about is maintaining a perfect image for others.
- They are angry
Although passive-aggressive narcissists don’t seem to have any anger issues on the surface, they mask anger.
When confronted with a passive aggressive character about something they did bad, they would throw a tantrum much like a child. If you are not used to this type of behavior, you will be surprised when it happens.
Of course, you won’t know how to respond to this kind of childish behavior. Solution? ignore them. Don’t give them any attention at all. It will starve their hungry egos. This method is known as the gray rock method and you can try it if you have a narcissist in your life.
How do the behaviors of a passive-aggressive narcissist affect you?
I think you can see how these traits can make you feel guilty if you are not used to narcissistic behavior. You can also start to feel worthless when the narcissist blames everything on you and never seems to take responsibility for anything.
The thing is, you have to remember, these traits are characteristics of a sick person. You should never take things seriously that people with personality disorders say, especially when they are obviously silly.
If you know someone who displays the traits of a passive aggressive narcissist, the first thing you need to understand is that it is not your fault for the way they act.
