Oh my God. What happened? Does the narcissist want to sit down and talk about it? Do they need to cry?
Let’s give them all a moment.
Okay.
They don’t deserve any of our time, but it’s really funny watching them go through their various stages…
Oh my God. What do I do now?
Let me explain these stages.
With pleasure!
Mistakes? What do you say?
Don’t even try to tell them they made a mistake; they’ll just deny it and blame you for being silly or toxic (oh, the irony!).
Instead, I always find it fun to just sit back and watch them. And for me, it goes through stages that are worth watching.
Related : 4 Things Narcissists Do When You Finally Stand Up To Them
Once you learn what they do when they make a mistake, you’ll have covered almost every narcissist by now.
First: Who Saw?
This first stage is usually a lot of fun.
A narcissist makes a mistake, and they’ll want to look around and make sure no one sees them.
But what if they see someone?
What if they’re spotted?
They’re paranoid. Their cover can’t be blown, so they have to track down whoever saw them before it’s too late.
Damage control.
But the problem with a narcissist is that it can often be too late, and that’s when panic sets in.
2: Can I smooth things over?
I don’t know, narcissist. Can you smooth things over?
You’ll no doubt try your best. After all, smoothing things over and pretending your mistakes didn’t happen is your strength, right?
Listen, if a narcissist could cover up their mistakes, they would. If they could make excuses, they would.
If they could run away from the situation and let someone else intervene, they would.
Narcissists are gracious, and many of them are able to talk themselves out of impossible situations.
Step_Three: Who Do I Blame?
Okay. It’s over, and the narcissist is in real trouble now. People are starting to suspect their involvement, so there’s only one way out…
…the narcissist has to blame someone else.
Could it be you? In fact, it probably is. If you’re the one who always sees their downfall as a blow, you’ll be in for another one.
Related : 9 Things Narcissists Say To Avoid Any Blame (And Blame You Instead)
Narcissists always need someone to declare their loyalty to them whenever they get the chance. They always want:
I’ll never abandon you.
I’ll always stand up for you.
You have my word.
Happy days, right?
Not so happy for you when everyone surrounds you without them. Suddenly, you’re like a deer in headlights, having to deal with the fallout while they happily run off into the sunset.
There’s always someone to blame in a narcissist’s world, which is why they make sure to have plenty of people around them.
Four: Back off and pretend it had nothing to do with me
Oh, how wonderful!
The narcissist is so adept at starting a fire, lighting the fuse, and watching the smoke turn into a spark, and the spark into a flame.
They do it so skillfully that you don’t even realize anything is happening.
Suddenly, you see flames, enormous flames. In no time, the night sky is lit up with flashes of yellow, orange, and red, burning fast and furiously.
But where is the narcissist now?
They’re long gone!
As far as they’re concerned, you can eat their dust!
Five: If all else fails: Laugh and ignore
When you get caught, you get caught. There’s not much you can do about it if all eyes are on you, and sometimes the narcissist gets caught in a room full of people.
When this happens, what choice does he have? He has to ignore it and laugh it off.
He does this by pretending it’s no big deal, even if he’s terrified inside.
What you need to consider is how important it is that they don’t want you to change your mind. If they have no way out, watch for embarrassment.
Of course!
I don’t know why I did that!
I must have forgotten my coffee this morning!
I swear I didn’t even mean to cause this (nervous laugh).
The problem is, mistakes can be big. They can be brutal. They can even be hurtful.
What does a narcissist do? They belittle them!
But wait! Does that seem fair when literally everything you do is criticized?
Absolutely not!
Narcissists never forget your mistakes because they’re too busy constantly reminding you of your flaws.
But that’s proof that theirs are there too! (To their disgust.)
“I Try Not To Hate Myself”
Any mistake made is a simple reminder that anything less than right always means room for self-loathing to creep in.
And it will happen, and it will happen!
They try hard every day to hide their hatred, but it’s there. Mistakes highlight the impossibility of getting rid of some things.
I feel sorry for the narcissists here, because they simply can’t love anything truly about themselves.
I sometimes wonder what it’s like to live this kind of life, and how sad and lonely it makes them feel deep down.
I don’t feel sorry for them enough to want to love them, but I see it as a daily, negative battle they fight with themselves.
That’s why their victims are forced to feel this way too. For the narcissist, that’s only fair.
Size Of The Mistake: “Should I Move On and Reinvent?”
Let’s start off by saying that size sometimes matters.
It’s well known (and I know some) that narcissists will get up and move on if their mistake is big enough. I mean, “There’s no way back from this.”
Narcissists would rather start over in a completely new place where no one knows them than get up and face the consequences.
Do you believe that? They would rather quit their jobs, relationships, and connections and move to a new town or city than do the right thing.
The reasons for this could be:
Embarrassment
Knowing there’s no going back
The desire to build their reputation and image with a new audience
Unable to get over the fact that people no longer see them as perfect
It’s pretty funny how far they’ll go, isn’t it?
